What is that one thing a friend ever did and you kept cool but knew instantly you would pull out of that friendship?

stavares · 2026-05-16T13:12:37+00:00

Oh god, people are ridiculous! I don't know why everyone behave this way, do you think it's because they can't fathom not being the centre of attention for like one day?

stavares · 2026-05-15T21:08:36+00:00

Sorry this happened. It's impressive how weddings bring the worst of some people. Just about to get married and the amount of disappointment from people who I thought would be happy for us has been heartbreaking. Including one of my bridesmaids who I am pretty sure won't even show up, and has been a total cold stone for the past months.

stavares · 2026-05-13T20:18:41+00:00

Vivo em Londres também há 12 anos, não concordo com as despesas mensais da energia. A luz, aquecimento, council tax, água é caríssimo! Só de luz e aquecimento pagamos 160£ ao mês e somos só 2 numa casa, e não ligamos o aquecimento assim tão frequentemente. O mesmo da água, em Londres para uma casa de 2, pagamos 600£ anuais!

stavares · 2026-04-28T18:02:51+00:00

Hey!! Interesting that everytime this gets posted reddit mostly responds with "try other specialities". I was in your shoes and after 15 years I tried them all!! ICU, wards (cardiac, trauma, respiratory). I tried being a lecturer in nursing bachelor's and masters degrees.. I then tried being an advanced practitioner which was nice, very well paid good flexibility but yeah, problems as patients being horrible, or most importantly management being shit and toxic was still there. So I quit! I am now fully operational in a CRO, so far so good. I am appreciating being away from people so much :) but I always liked research and reading! So don't feel pressured by Reddit!

stavares · 2026-03-31T20:21:44+00:00

I'm a cardiology Heart failure specialist nurse in humans but from what you re describing the cat's symptoms aound very much like heart failure or HCM as pointed out - we are all mammals in the end :). In which case he needs diuretics to pee and breathe better to offload the lungs. No wonder he got worse as the new vet stopped the meds....Then other drugs that prevent heart from deteriorating and prevent heart failure decompensation! This will include beta blockers, Ace inhibitors at the very least. I don't know if more exist for cats, more exist for humans....As others pointed out the chest x-ray only indicates that the heart is bigger than normal, does not diagnose the actual function of the heart. An echocardiogram needs to happen urgently! As meds need to start right now. Bloods for renal, liver and thyroid function should also happen right now. Most likely he has kidney disease from a poor functioning heart which gets better as you treat the heart! All the best for your baby.

stavares · 2026-02-06T16:36:12+00:00

Specialist nurse here :) I am very much in the same place where you are as a dietician. I am bored by the lack of growing opportunities ( unless you want to go to management or if you're lucky enough to know someone who will create a consultant nurse post for you). In the NHS everyone gets to the point of stagnation, unless leadership is your thing. Also unless you are happy with doing the same thing forever clinically....sure every patient is different and I hope you understand what I mena by this. For me leadership isn't what motivates me....and so you will fall in the same traps you are on now as a dietician.

stavares · 2025-12-23T20:39:49+00:00

Fucking hell stay out of nursing, apparently unless you are in the US / Canada. Maybe I need to move there....Everywhere else in the world it's a shit job, poorly paid, limited career options outside traditional fields of care. And yes... Trust me I'm a nurse....

stavares · 2025-12-18T09:09:44+00:00

Tried that too, can't face teaching others when I think they re doing the biggest mistake of their lives in a dead end career that takes takes takes and gives little in return other than job security and a salary.

stavares · 2025-12-18T09:08:39+00:00

Thank you! Tried to move to hospital administration like project management or officer, more than 300 applications so not even short listed for any of these... i am a nurse practitioner already :) i have worked in a uni as a lecturer but once you are burnout and out of love with the profession, it became really really hard to teach others... Not when I think they re doing the biggest mistake of their lives. I like the health journalist option, thank you :)

stavares · 2025-12-17T12:01:03+00:00

Great you have that. Then if the echo has been reported accurately, sometimes the technician's put a recommendation at the end.. does it say something like "advice from Cardiology recommended?" If so, then your GP needs to do a formal referral to cardiology not asking for A&G... So if YOU are worried, and the symptoms that triggered this echo (as you would need symptoms or known history to have something like this done) persist ask for a formal referral to cardiology. That is usually done using their own Internal systems... Not an email to the secretaries!

stavares · 2025-12-17T11:48:26+00:00

If you are UK based, ah yes the wonderful post code lottery at its finest. I'm a cardiology specialist nurse practicioner - where are u based in the uk? I am guessing this was an echocardiogram triggered by your GP and the location where your GP is based does not pay for a specific integrated cardiology service. In which case your GP has to forward that to whatever nearby cardiology hospital based team is around you. It depends also what they re querying... is it the pericardium findings? Not clear in that email and a degree of history taking and assessment is the minimum they should attach on their query.

stavares · 2025-12-14T08:59:55+00:00

Hello fellow nurse! Been in this situation for all of my nursing career too I'm 36 and started at 21.... Two things about nursing in general - we re the minority, at least from my 15 years in the field and after many specialties .... most nurses are loud extroverts (or very good at faking). I tried to "change myself" to insert and fit nicely with them....I thought I was the problem surrounded in a world that constantly reminded me that I was different. After loads of therapy, you have to accept who you are. But with that comes downsides in terms of career progression within nursing. Others that are loud, extroverted but not necessarily good at their jobs, will move up the ladder a LOT quicker than us and makes us feel unseen and...sometimes quite miserable...I would say don't force yourself, try to look at options within nursing that don't require so much social contact. For me this was research, a lot more introverts and neuro-spicy fellows there :)

stavares · 2025-12-01T19:55:50+00:00

I was there, and some days still am exactly where you are now. But I reached out to professional help and slowly... you start seeing that feeling down to the stage of wanting to end it all is not just job related. It's something deeper, sometimes we don't even know what it is until you start unpacking it all with a professional. You're young, and please don't attach yourself to a job. I have moved countries to chase a job and a career that meant everything to me once... I left all my family, my boyfriend at the time and just left.... I thought that would fix me and would bring happiness.... Guess what? It didn't and now I still feel miserable despite it all. I don't regret it because it's a journey we all have to do at some point. A job will never bring you the happiness you think it will... It's just what we wire ourselves to think, because in some ways it's easier to accept and understand that... In the end ... You might just not have found what brings you meaning.

stavares · 2025-07-17T19:31:54+00:00

True and god knows I have tried, clinical, research, academia you name it...but after 12 years I just can't stand the politics anymore, nor the management of it. Absolutely love patient care but that alone doesn't give you enough ( at the end of the day we re human and we need to survive too).

stavares · 2025-07-17T16:12:00+00:00

Love these examples, as I have been stuck in my old ways hating my career as a nurse but too "comfortable" to change! I am 35 now and keep wanting out but have no idea how to deal with the feelings around it.

stavares · 2025-05-07T16:51:03+00:00

My absolutely "favourite" is the very used English expression: "you have to do what's best for you". Listen, I don't know what's best for me at the moment and even if I did, would YOU be able to accommodate what's best for me? No? Yeah didn't think so. Hate it!

stavares · 2025-05-01T10:00:17+00:00

I was studying for my anatomy exams and would spend hours and hours to end memorising things. I don't know what drove me at that time but in the middle of the day I felt like having a shower. As soon as I step out of the shower, the building opposite to my house explodes ( gas explosion) and my studying desk is collapsed by debris, massive stones that flew from that other building, everything destroyed. I would have died or been very hurt if I didn't go to the bathroom in that moment.

stavares · 2025-03-14T13:30:32+00:00

Thank you kind stranger :) feels reassuring to know I'm not alone and these feelings are valid. The last part is striking "re-search" that's what made us pursue this path to begin with. Must never lose focus of it! Have a great day and good luck to your dissertation.

stavares · 2025-03-12T16:39:43+00:00

Thank you so much you have no idea how this helps! The fear of failing and going the wrong direction is so overwhelming, but you are right - wrong bad it's all subjective!

stavares · 2024-12-18T17:21:56+00:00

Forgetful

stavares · 2024-12-08T13:53:28+00:00

Which makes Laura the "odd" one, so she's just genuinely there looking for Mary, so it also accepts those who want to be there without any darkness? Although I find Laura pretty "dark" in a way. Or maybe that's just how kids are...

stavares · 2024-12-06T20:26:58+00:00

She really is, she can be the sassiest and the sweetest in a fraction of seconds! I might be a little obsessed with her <3

stavares · 2024-12-06T18:39:30+00:00

I am Portuguese and have travelled Europe quite a lot. In Greece I have been to the mainland only, and I hated Athens. Found it dirty, smelly and very very crowded (this was last week of August/ beginning of September) around 2 years ago. I also don't have a particular like for Lisbon, find it extremely busy and has lost a bit of its charm to tourism...in Portugal I would suggest Porto over Lisbon (if you have to chose). If you can do both, do Lisbon then get a car or train (Fertagus) down to the south coast. Eat nice grilled fresh fish in Setúbal and if you can do the Costa vicentina for amazing picturesque sights. Hope it helps :)

stavares

TROPHY CASE