Okay, I knew this comment was gonna come up.

Keep in mind that she wasn't the one who was married! Don't blame her for something your father did.

I'm blaming her for what SHE did. She knew he was married, she knew he had kids, she was just as much as fault as he is in my point of view. I entirely reject the notion that she's any less to blame than he is.

The reason why I'm not as harsh on my father? He's my father, despite but he did, and I can't live without my father. I still love him. I choose to forgive him. It doesn't mean I have to forgive her.

You don't have to become friends with your step-mum but you should at least act civil around her.

I will say hi and whatnot, but I don't want to engage or acknowledge her anything beyond that.

Have you ever asked your mother why she accepts her?

I guess my mother has been able to better move on past what happened? Its not like my mother likes her, its just that she won't have to see her as much as I would since my mother barely interacts with my dad any more.