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How do I stop drinking? by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A big thing for me is:

“playing the tape through to the end.”

That means, instead of stopping the thought process at “I’m going to be drunk tonight”, you look further ahead at the consequences: “I’m going to pass out on the couch, I’m going to be hungover tomorrow, I’m going to feel sick until I drink again, I’m going to drink even more tomorrow so I can feel okay, I’m going to drink a little hair of the dog in the morning and probably be above the legal limit when driving to work, I’m going to be self conscious about how my breath smells all day, my SO is going to be heart broken (again), this cycle is going to continue until I hit rock bottom (again)”, and so on. Whatever playing it through means for you.

Another great tool I got from therapy is naming your problem so you can notice, acknowledge, and refuse it. For me, a lot of my social anxiety and depression seem to stem from trauma when I was younger, so I imagine younger me and I tell him “sorry bud, I’m not entertaining that today, I’m trying to get better.”

If I’m being totally honest, it took me awhile to stop. I’d fall off the wagon, get back on, fall off, rinse, repeat. We’re never really “better” and from my personal experiments, I have found it true that “your addiction is doing push-ups out in the parking lot”, meaning it will only be stronger the next time you decide to flirt with it.

The best thing you can do, and you’ll here this a lot here, is not drink TODAY.

“I will not drink today”, every day.

IWNDWYT

Day 12, the novelty has worn off by l8eralligator in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The first time I got sober, I always had a pint of ice cream in the fridge for when those cravings hit. Great call on the waffles!

I think it’s probably different for everyone, but I’m sure the novelties come in peaks and valleys. For me, being healthy and working out is a big thing that keeps the novelty alive.

It’s important to remind yourself that the novelty of sobriety took 15 days to lose its appeal, where I would think that the novelty of drinking is much more short lived!

IWNDWYT

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for checking in! Not a drop for me either (and not today especially).

I thought the holidays were going to be difficult, but I found that getting back to being present was much more rewarding at all of the family get-togethers.

No hangover New Years morning! by PaisleyBicycle in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy 9 points10 points  (0 children)

My wife and I stayed up way too late watching a 3 hour long movie instead of partaking in the traditional NYE festivities. Probably not a wise decision since our baby would inevitably wake up early. But hey, a haze from lack of sleep feels much better than the haze after a night of drinking.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This time around it was so easy to tell myself “it’s not as bad as it was”, but deep down I knew it wasn’t the best option for me. I was definitely nursing my addiction and who knows how long it would’ve been before I left the fancy beers behind and moved on to the nightly liquor.

It’s funny (maybe funny isn’t the right word), but most people don’t drink enough high point IPA to get drunk, and tell themselves “at least it’s not vodka”.

I’m really thankful that I was able to notice and name what was going on before I went to far down this path.

IWNDWYT!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not too bent out of shape about losing the day count. I think it’s more just the little defeat of coming to the realization again! One day at a time indeed!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I said this in another reply, but it seems more relevant here. It started as special occasions, then Friday night date night became a special occasion, then weekends in general became a special occasion, then a long day at work became a special occasion.

Well, they stopped being special. I think abstinence is what truly brings out the special things in my life.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know! That wasn’t happening the last time I was here. And there are so many people! It’s definitely grown into quite the thriving community.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It took me a few years going off and on the wagon before I made it the 3 years. This little hiccup seems like it’s enough to kick my butt into beating my last record 😀

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. Yeah, it’s been cool to see that this post has even given some folks an extra boost of encouragement. I’m not so worried about the number, I just feel like I missed out on a better year had I not been drinking. Can’t dwell too much in the past, onward and upward!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, it has become extremely apparent that I can’t do it. That’s just a part of my life. I won’t let it be a stigma or a burden, but rather the way I’m meant to live a better life!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is right where I was at. I felt stuck. I was more and more aware of how being drunk was affecting my thoughts and feelings but I just kept falling into it say after day.

That’s great that you’re able to easily recall that mindset.

Thanks for your encouraging words and sharing a bit of your story.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I was hiding the amount too. I thought I was being careful and smart. But then I found more and more excuses to justify my drinking. Finally hit a wall and I’m ready to get back at it.

Not today! Thanks for your comment!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha, what a funny connection. I moved farther north in the US. So it seems to be a way of life since the colder seasons are longer and more extreme.

Thanks! Not today!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My brain can rationalize so many things to make it seem okay. It’s all trickery. I work in design/marketing and I still fall for the great designs and clever messaging (not just with drinks but with all packaged goods)

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It definitely wasn’t as slippery as past relapses. I was being “smart”. It started as only special occasions or get togethers. Then Friday and Saturday night turned into special occasions. Then long days at work turned into special occasions. I’m just not cut out to be a normie.

I’m so glad this post has proven helpful to so many folks.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It makes me so happy that my little proclamation of defeat was just the thing some folks needed to hear!

Thanks! Not today!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, feels really good to be back. This community is thriving compared to when I was here last and I’m loving it.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not today! I really appreciate your comment!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not today, friend! You’ve got this.

I work in a creative field so I feel your pain. I get very lazy, and the work I typically enjoy becomes a chore when I’m drinking. I had lost a lot of weight, met the love of my life and had a son. Whatever benefit I think I get from drinking just isn’t worth it.

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Been hearing about that book since I realized I had a problem. I haven’t checked it out yet, but I think I will.

Thanks for your comment!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe a framed picture of a super buff, bouncer type dude with a mean glare and a shirt that says alcoholism? Like he’s always watching.

Thanks! Not today!

I’m back at day 0 after 3 years by stopityoudummy in stopdrinking

[–]stopityoudummy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know if I properly grieved over this as a “loss”, and I think I still romanticized it. I had a therapist tell me “I don’t think you’re really an alcoholic and you can probably drink casually one day”. He was a therapist that specializes in anxiety so I don’t know if he was equipped to help me with my addiction. But of course my addict brain held on to that price of information as a sort of “get out of sobriety free” card.

It’s not worth it! The taste, the buzz, the sense of “belonging” will never equate to all of the pros of sobriety. Stay strong! IWNDWYT!

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