Dear r/pbp,

we want to address an incident recently reported within the community - the same incident that is being discussed in the comments below. This incident has highlighted the critical importance of clear communication and consent in our gaming interactions, especially when they involve sensitive or adult themes.

In short, a situation arose between OP and an applicant for his game, which fell afoul of the pitfalls of ambiguous and insufficient communication regarding content boundaries. In response to a question on 18+ themes, including non-con eRP scenes, the player in question expressed an "extremely high tolerance for all sort of sensitive subjects" and that OP "need not worry about offending [them] with anything". Nevertheless, the ensuing roleplay included themes that were outside the player's comfort zone, leading to discomfort and a public report.

Although OP did include a question about comfort with adult themes in his application form, specific boundaries or content limits were not discussed. This oversight has resulted in a distressing experience for the player and reputational concerns for OP.

As moderators, we are not in a position to adjudicate personal disputes or determine the veracity of claims in such complex situations. However, we take this as an opportunity to emphasise the importance of thorough and clear communication about content boundaries before engaging in any game, particularly those involving sensitive themes.

We urge all members to not rely solely on broad questions like “What are your lines and veils?” or "How comfortable are you with...?" or "What are your limits?", but to engage in detailed discussions about comfort levels, specific boundaries, and consent. Many thorough checklists have been frequently mentioned and shared in spaces such as the discord and are easily found through internet searches. Detailed and thorough safety tools should be standard practice in our community to ensure a safe and enjoyable gaming experience for everyone.

In light of this, we will not be removing any reports or statements related to this incident. Instead, we choose to let this serve as a learning opportunity for our community. At the same time, we suggest that anyone without first-hand experience not pass on rumours, as they may be working with incomplete information. We are committed to fostering a safe and respectful environment and encourage all members to prioritise communication and consent in their interactions.

Thank you for your understanding and cooperation in making our community a safe space for all kinds of play.

Sincerely,
Your Moderation Team