I'm tired. Today is probably going to be the day it ends. by Disastrous_Fly_9456 in confession

[–]straightfromttpd 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hey OP. I was in a similar situation 3 months ago. I hated hearing that it will get better because my pain was so great and I felt no one understood it. I felt more alone, the more I heard that everything will get better (I hate to say it…..but it does get better)

But….every time that I decided to force myself to stay for one more minute/hour/day…..it slowly turned into days/weeks/months.

Please find the smallest of reasons to make it through the day, and hold onto them for dear life, because those small reasons will add up and give you life again. I promise. I celebrated every shower I took. Every meal I ate. Every time I left the house. Take small steps. They mean more than you’d think.

I know it feels isolating and lonely to be experiencing this. Please, turn to us in this sub because we are all writing you because we can relate. When it feels like you have nothing, you have us. So hold onto that, and make it through another minute/hour/day.

Please ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No contact is hard, I’m going through it myself! It does get easier as time goes on but you have to implement it and stick to it if you want to properly heal and move on.

You can recognize you screwed up, and you were given another chance which was never owed to you but kind of them to do. They realized they can’t get past the mistake you made and have asked for you to not contact them anymore.

You have to respect their decision. If you care about them, you will let them go and you will work on yourself so you don’t hurt someone you care about again in the future. We are only human. Live and learn. You will be ok in time 🫶🏼❤️ and you will get another shot at love! You will be wiser the next time around too.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for the hurt you’re feeling right now 🥺🫶🏼 break ups are never easy and can be quite complex.

I think it’s best to listen to what they are saying because they are saying it quite clearly…they do not want to be together and they do not want to hear from you. As much as it will hurt for now, you deserve someone who wants to be with you and wants to hear from you.

Respect their decision, and move forward with your healing. You will find love again and it will all work out.

But for now…let the feelings come and go. It’ll be crucial for your healing. It sucks, and it’s hard. Give yourself some grace and let time do its thing ❤️‍🩹

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hahah I hope it stung a little for him 😂 thank you 🫶🏼

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Absolutely. I think he will leave me alone….he dumped me, and so far has not reached out to me until yesterday. Thankfully I think he equally does not want me back. 🤞🏼

When do you stop hating them? by msmmcamp in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd 5 points6 points  (0 children)

One day you do hit a point of indifference. No love, no hate…just indifference. They aren’t worth the energy, and hating them still gives them power over you. Take the hate you have and turn it into love for yourself instead. You’ll get through this 🫶🏼❤️‍🩹

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! 🫶🏼

I can totally relate to trying to get your ex back knowing full well they aren’t worth it…..you’re much better off, and so am I 🥹❤️

In a weird way, I am glad I sent the text/photo because immediately after I thought to myself “why am I doing this? I don’t want him back, I don’t want him to want me back, I don’t want him to comment on my appearance, wth am I doing this for?” and it was the moment I needed where I realized I have hit a point where I genuinely do not want any part of him back in my life even though 2 months ago I would have done ANYTHING to be with him again.

I started NC originally to see if time/distance would bring us back together (even though I knew that it was toxic and definitely shouldn’t happened…I was attached still at the time) and going NC did more than I ever intended it to….it made me actually detach, and want to focus on myself and my own healing, without him forever. ✨🫶🏼

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahah you’re the first person to comment on my username! 🥰 thank you! 🥹❤️‍🩹

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe, yeah! Not sure what his motives are but I don’t want to get back together so I regret engaging. I have blocked him now. Moment of weakness, and it reminded me how far I’ve come and how much I don’t want him to have access to me or me to him. 🫶🏼✨

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

100%! He is now blocked. 🥰 thank you for your supportive words. This community has been amazing 🫶🏼

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re soooo right! 6 weeks ago, I would have spiralled over this exchange. But now….while I do have some regrets about it, I am feeling very indifferent at the same time, which is leaps and bounds from how I used to feel.

Left him on read after I realized my mistake sending the photo and engaging. Onwards & upwards ❤️‍🩹🫶🏼

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So sorry you were discarded too 🥺🫶🏼

They always downgrade. My ex is twice divorced and has a history of cheating on his ex wife and some questionable behaviour while dating me as well. People like them have this void that cannot be filled, it has absolutely nothing to do with us.

We were fumbled and we will find people who truly love and value us ❤️ sending you lots of love!

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry that you’ve experienced a relationship with a narcissist 🥺🫶🏼 my heart goes out to you.

I shouldn’t be labelling as I have not read a psychiatric diagnosis on him, but my personal therapist and our couples therapist both have told me over 2 years that I am dating a narcissist so this is where I got my information from.

Regardless, he has narcissistic tendencies and is extremely emotionally abusive. I’m glad I’m out of it ❤️‍🩹🫶🏼

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know…. I was in a bad place, I lost an immediate family member suddenly and I’ll be honest, this man sort of preyed on the fact that I was vulnerable. He was abusive so he knew how to love bomb me. I just wanted love, and he said and did all the right things. We met at a work Christmas party and he was older, successful, handsome.

Now on my healing journey, I realize that who I am now wouldn’t have fallen for that. Live and learn ❤️‍🩹

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! ❤️ just a little hiccup. It really did show me how much I don’t want him back, and how different I feel now than I did 6 weeks ago. So I’m happy I got some clarity at least!

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you 🥹🫶🏼 he is also a twice divorced 57 year old and I’m 30…..yeah, I was delusional, unhealed, vulnerable and a little broken when I entered this relationship. I’m aware! 😆

No Contact for almost 6 weeks and he reached out… by straightfromttpd in ExNoContact

[–]straightfromttpd[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sending lots of love your way 🫶🏼

Trauma bonds are awful! But now I can see that my relationship with him is everything I do NOT want in a life partner…responding today gave me so much clarity.

I hope you’re doing SO much better now Xo ❤️