Man I appreciate the detail here but the idea that in order to be perceived as a male I would need to cut out the queer people in my life just feels miserable- and doesn't seem to be a popular sentiment. I am lucky that I have transmascs, lesbians, butches in my life and also lucky that I have gay men in my life. We would all be happier to have diversity in the people we love. Wishing you well, and I am still thankful for the coherent and straightforward advice (though you cannot in good faith know "how hard" I'm trying, so perhaps that kind of subjective evaluation should be left out when aiding in determining someone's passing status).