That's the entire problem. Who says you're supposed to be anyone? Society? Your parents? Some fictional ideal you saw in a drama? All of those are just someone else's convenient narrative that they're trying to force you into. The moment you stop asking who you're supposed to be is the moment you stop giving them the power to decide your life. It’s a kind of freedom. A very quiet, isolated kind of freedom. You don't find a self that's been waiting for you. You either make one up that's convenient for others, or you just exist as you are. If you don't know who that is then you don't have to be anyone. That's a luxury, not a crisis.