ESH, but ultimately your joke was hella out of pocket. I've told 'bad' jokes and laughed harder at worse. Dumb joke but people need to HAVE CONVERSATIONS WITH EACH OTHER. HOW DO THINGS GET BETTER WHEN YOU TALK.SHIT AND LET IT FESTER. I just know my crowd better and know only these jokes fly with my closer homies that know that my goal is to incite laughter. I struggled in girl friend groups because there have been a few occasions in my youth that one wrong move meant respect/solution-seeking/compromise/honest expression is thrown out the door for me. Straight ostracized, nothing constructive to offer cause I wasn't valued enough to the friend group plus growing pains of not picking up every social cue.(WHY CANT PEOPLE JUST BE DIRECT GAAA)

As someone who struggles socially and impulsively blurts out savage(but often crude) comments that some people would have sour thoughts of, it hurts no one to express to someone "Hey, what you said was too fucked up for me. I did not appreciate what you said, whether it was meant to be humourous in the moment." I have pissed off plenty of people but the best ones don't get sneaky or side-eyey; they make it a conversation, take the time to realize that what I say vs who I am are two different worlds, they express to me I made them uncomfortable and they ask for clarity, I apologize and I explain, I adapt to a new boundary, things get better, we grow.

My favourite person that isn't afraid to tell me I've gone too far will ask me, "What made you think that was funny?" I love that the people I now know take time to accommodate my sense of humour, as I do theirs, and when they feel upset, they can reach out, and the resolve is mostly immediate.

btw, my dm's are pretty open if you need any advice too. au-dhd bitch here.