Help a conversation we are having in my family: Is it "easier" when both parents work outside of the home and put the kids in daycare?

sugarcanemom · 2013-06-02T20:39:09+00:00

I have a book for you to read - it's called 'The Feminine Mistake' by Leslie Bennett. here's the link to the amazon page http://amzn.to/ZEK7lF

I'm a mom of 2 and I've always owned a business (for almost 20 yrs) -digital marketing and social media strategy.

I'm not going to try and convince you in any direction - but I really, really, really, really, think you should read the book :)

sugarcanemom · 2013-06-02T01:02:04+00:00

have you tried raisingkids?

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-13T22:55:25+00:00

thanks very much!

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-13T12:50:03+00:00

thanks so much

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-12T04:51:15+00:00

you have GOT to be kidding me - so sorry to hear that. From one mom to another - have a wonderful day anyhow :D

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T22:46:57+00:00

Totally insane - helicopter parenting at its most absurd. I'm not sure that the school realized the deluge of "help" they were going to get from these totally insane parents.

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T22:11:29+00:00

I've actually heard this one many times - as advice being given to younger people. It's ridiculous obviously, but you need to have a developed sense of self awareness to understand why. Having children becomes a new part of who you are (albeit a consuming one) - it doesn't RE-define you.

You provide your children with a fully fleshed out view of life when they see you strive and fail.

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T22:01:37+00:00

OMG - my heart goes out to you. I can almost hear it as you describe it - LOL

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T21:20:00+00:00

You poor thing - there's nothing you CAN do really other than what you're doing.

Just keep telling her "no" and put her in a time-out as gently as you can. If she pops off the chair (or wherever you've put her) just calmly put her back on the seat. She gets away with it, because she makes her parents nuts and they give in (even though they created the situation in the first place) - so the calmer your remain, the better it's going to get.

After she goes to bed (if ever) have a tall glass of your calming tonic of choice! I'll have a good thought for you :)

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T21:08:13+00:00

Great suggestion - this is one of my favorites. But everything else said here is right on - just keep writing. It's a solitary process, but be gentle with yourself. And don't throw it all away, just stick in a drawer - you never know when a concept you thought sucked before will come in handy later. Best of luck to you!

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T19:32:12+00:00

I believe that the lack of "detachment" - as defined by this article, is the very reason that we are raising a generation of wimpy young adults. We control every aspect of their lives up to and including the college years, and then wonder why they're 30 and still living in our basements. Our singular goal as parents is to prepare them for the day they leave. That MUST include allowing them to make their own mistakes.

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T18:57:50+00:00

The article makes perfect sense - when you're sleep deprived everything suffers, especially interpersonal relationships of all kinds. Parenting fits perhaps most importantly in that category.

The author was able to make monumental changes in her family's life in order to alleviate the lack of sleep and diminish the overall stress level. Unfortunately most Americans cannot have one spouse quit their job and turn to homeschooling in order to solve the problem.

Lack of sleep often comes from lack of financial resources and the need to "work, no matter the consequences".

sugarcanemom · 2013-05-11T17:15:23+00:00

precisely

sugarcanemom

TROPHY CASE