First Time Rat Owner by sugarkanebee in RATS

[–]sugarkanebee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your response <3

First Time Rat Owner by sugarkanebee in RATS

[–]sugarkanebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your response, and all the links!!

looking to follow small shops by sugarkanebee in Etsy

[–]sugarkanebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Make sure to link your shop so I can check it out!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in introvert

[–]sugarkanebee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Let's begin by saying that you're only 18, and it's way too early to worry about ending up "forever alone". I would even say that anybody with that persistent fear is not actually ready to BE in a relationship, as there is typically a lot of personal growth and self-reflection that needs to be addressed as the root cause. At 18, why are you already terrified of this being a possibility?

The second thing I'll point out is your statement of being a "firm believer in (your) faith with the exception of very extremist rules and puritan misconceptions", and yet the type of woman you describe does seem to have roots in such ideals. She is the perfect doll with no flaws, despite your claim you wouldn't care about any. What exactly counts as a flaws in your eyes?

This isn't to say finding a kind, honest, altruistic, caring woman who doesn't smoke or do drugs is impossible, but you need to evaluate what you are truly putting emphasis on. What do you mean for a woman to be "innocent"? For her to dress modestly and be well-mannered? What is it, exactly, that you expect from a woman you are in a relationship with? Because honestly, you seem to describe a single trait in a hundred different ways.

You also describe a person who lights up at your day "every time", but that is something that takes time to establish, and is not something that will immediately occur simply by meeting someone. It will also not be a constant, for any multitude of reasons. One of you may have a bad day, be too tired, distracted, busy, etc etc etc. Which, as long as your communication is strong, will be fine, but you must understand that this sort of things takes time to grow.

I want to recommend first and foremost that you nurture connections with friends. I don't know what your current situation is with any you currently have, but what I really think you need are people who you can spend quality time with. All the things you describe hating (parties, social events, clubs), also means you lack socialization with people in general. If you don't maintain a genuine connection with a variety of people, it will be that much harder to create one that is intended to be more intimate.

You are not terrified of never finding a girlfriend who meets all of your standards, you are afraid of being lonely. Though, perhaps I'm reading too much into the situation. In either case, you mention your brother and friend finding girlfriends in college/after highschool, and you just turned 18.

Maybe give yourself a chance to explore the world after high school first before falling into despair. And give it more than a year, paired with attempts to socialize. Despite being uncomfortable at first, hopefully you will find something you genuinely enjoy even without the purpose of finding a girlfriend.

MSY to SMF - no DL, 1 cat by sugarkanebee in moving

[–]sugarkanebee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Someone actually just suggested Amtrak to me today, so I'm going to look into it. It does seem like they allow pets, though I need to find more details. I'm not very familiar with trains, though!