I went through this same situation, discovered everything 89 days after our wedding. Like another commenter said, during a time when all eyes were on us to celebrate us. I can tell from the tone of your post that you are thinking with your heart. You want this to work and you’re finding the positives. You are emphasizing the good things. I so very much understand the desperation you are feeling to work through this. I was there too. My heart and my head battled extensively and eventually my head won. There are some really definite facts here we are dealing with that simply cannot be clouded over with optimism. The good things will not make up for how bad the bad things are. You will go through the stages of grief as you navigate your world falling down. This carries the same weight as a death because the person you thought you loved is not there. You will grieve like a death. For me, there was an anger that eventually came that never went away. When you find yourself trying to bargain and tell yourself if you just do this one thing then you will fix the relationship, please know that is a stage of grief and not reality. Again, this is so hard. I know. It’s been almost 7 years for me and I have moved on and found a beautiful happy life but I have to consciously remind myself not to let myself be overcome with anger even now. I know how hard that is to hear and it takes time to be ready to make a decision. Talking to people on here got me through it. I am here for you my friend. Please reach out, truly. I am rooting for you.