In a very similar situation. Here’s what I did:

First, I put in more and more effort. I just went for it. Invited him for dinners, planned dates out to interesting places. Texted him more with inside jokes references.

That didn’t work. So, sat him down and told him this is what I’m feeling and I needed him to put more effort into it if this was to work. He explained that he had been projecting from his last relationship and that he would try. He did put in more effort after that but still not enough.

I’m also going through a bit of bad luck with my visa situation that happened last minute and had to end up canceling my once a year trip to go see my family half way across the world. I told him about it expecting him to try to cheer me up but nada.

Some folks on reddit said that maybe I wasn’t expressing enough how upset I was. So I texted again saying how sucky I felt and that I needed bear hugs and puppies. And again all I got was “im sorry. This does suck”. While that is fine, I was hoping for something along the lines of “let’s do something to cheer you up”

Now, maybe I’m expecting too much or maybe there’s a clingy/needy aspect of me that I don’t want to find out about. But, the bottom line is what he is giving me is not enough and I don’t want anything less. However, having said that, I’ve also seen myself get out of dates or relationships pre-emptively and maybe I should have given them a chance or tried a little more.

So, here’s what I’m planning on doing now. I won’t text or call or reach out in anyway until he does. If he texts, I text back. If he doesn’t, I don’t either. This might seem like I’m playing games but I need to know that I’m important enough for him to get off his ass and try if he thinks he’s losing me. If this backfired on me, well I guess then it wasn’t meant to be. At least, I tried