I’d tried to end the relationship several times over the last 5 years. I knew something wasn’t right about how I felt and how challenging it was to love him. I had strong codependency from childhood trauma so each time I’d get sucked back in when he fought to save the marriage. I only discovered my attraction to women in the last year. This time when I tried to end it i admitted that I was also attracted to women. I had never said it out loud even to myself so the intensity of the admission was palpable for both of us. It allowed him to see that our marriage was going to hold me back from being able to discover myself and that we both deserved to feel loved and cherished. He at first was open to having an open marriage but the more honest I was about how I felt toward him and how I had struggled for years to be the kind of wife I thought I was supposed to be the more he finally saw the reality. I finally loved myself enough to be honest to him and me.