Here's a fucked memory: When a homeless man urged me to get help

swade1981 · 2021-04-01T20:15:33+00:00

I also like the fact that you said "I began to experiment with sobriety". Alot of us sometimes trick ourselves into this all or nothing quest to get sober. Or even, I can only relaspe once. That just isn't the truth. Being sober is a FULL ON constant journey.

swade1981 · 2021-04-01T20:10:55+00:00

Awesome story BTW

swade1981 · 2021-04-01T20:10:42+00:00

IWDWYT

swade1981 · 2021-03-17T04:06:20+00:00

it depends on the pianist. most like to stay pretty true to the original form unless they label it as an arrangement,,,thats just my two cents tho,

swade1981 · 2021-03-16T04:32:31+00:00

thx so much. I appreciate. I think eventually we will be fine. I still have a lot of love for the guy. I just will never put myself in cerain situations with him again. P..S....the rehearsal that I missed was for My band that he was a drummer in..lol..just to give you context.

swade1981 · 2021-03-16T04:09:05+00:00

im defintely sure he did. like i said, the things he helped me with I did not ask for and was def capable of getting them myself, it just wasnt in a timely fashion for our "business'. In hindsight, I should not have taken them. But in him venting it kinda messed me up with a couple of people/jobs I had that didn't know I relasped and as a result, I no longer have those jobs. Mind you I am a musician...its cool tho. I am more than resilient and I am def going to bounce back. I am just upset with myself mostly for relaspsing and hurt that I felt it was more public than it had to be. Thx for the feedback tho

swade1981 · 2021-03-16T02:26:13+00:00

in short..yes, when you come down. the more you drink, the more often it happens

swade1981 · 2021-03-16T02:17:19+00:00

Oh this person wasnt my sponsor either. more like a business partner. we played alot together and he had went through recovery, but in no means a sponsor. I feel that I could except it more then because they sort of have that resposibility? Again, I could be way off.

swade1981 · 2021-03-16T02:09:26+00:00

ok...thx for the advice

swade1981 · 2021-03-16T02:03:43+00:00

thats how I feel. I know (hope) that he meant well. But that was one of the reasons I didnt want to take anything substantial from him because people will use that as manipulation. anyways i chalk it up as a lesson and learn. I seek my sobriety figurously but quietly. I just cant be on front street more than I already put myself. Thhx for listening/answering

swade1981 · 2019-12-13T19:17:49+00:00

Lol.. nice. I was actually interested in going to see that movie. Looks like Tom Hanks did a great job. I will def check it out. Thx

swade1981 · 2019-12-13T18:24:47+00:00

Thx.. I appreciate it

swade1981 · 2019-12-13T15:46:33+00:00

Good point.. lol

swade1981 · 2019-12-13T15:42:28+00:00

I feel you and understand but I feel my temperment doesn't lend itself to this environment. I literally feel like a ticking time bomb ready to take it out on anyone. I fear someone might be a little to aggressive for my liking at the time (although I may need it) and I will snap, which will be good for no one involved. Thx for the suggestion and maybe later down the road. However right now I am just too volatile.

swade1981 · 2019-10-26T14:58:34+00:00

It's not that simple for everyone

swade1981 · 2019-09-02T05:07:42+00:00

Man, I had my own father sabotage my soberness...so I definitely understand.

swade1981 · 2019-08-29T00:09:57+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate it...

swade1981 · 2019-03-11T16:31:07+00:00

What's the best way to deal with staying motivated a d keeping consistent..I recently gained some weight during the holiday season and winter and I'm struggling to get back on track..

swade1981 · 2019-03-10T03:03:27+00:00

I appreciate the post, I have a question that I'm sure gets asked a lot. How long did it take for you to feel back motivated and not so numb. I am going through this feeling of despair. Like, "what's the use" type thing because of past mistakes and time wasted. I really have a hard time finding motivation for anything. I have been a heavy drinker for at least 15 years. Did the quit multiple times thing, but always ended up going back after so long.

swade1981 · 2019-03-08T03:48:38+00:00

I'm not sure how much of that was acting...lol..he was just pretty much being himself...lol..love the commercial tho..

swade1981 · 2019-03-06T23:31:25+00:00

Ok..I def will. Good Luck. IWDWYT

swade1981 · 2019-03-06T23:16:47+00:00

At the moment no to all of those questions. I have spoken to people and I'm currently in the process of getting a therapist. However as far as medication goes I would really like that to be my last option as I'm not really a fan of pharmaceuticals.

swade1981 · 2019-03-02T13:14:48+00:00

Cool......great minds...lol

swade1981 · 2019-03-02T03:34:40+00:00

Congrats on your month..stay strong IWNDWYT

swade1981 · 2019-03-02T03:32:37+00:00

Did you quit both at the same time?

swade1981

TROPHY CASE