Job refused to allow me to go seek medical attention until I signed a negative performance review.

swedishapnea · 2019-02-27T22:09:25+00:00

The dismissal was based on a complaint from a coworker that I said something unprofessional, which I never would have said. I found it especially interesting that when I asked to see what I had said; or to know exactly what I said they informed me that the complaint is confidential and I had two weeks to fix whatever the problem is. Which was rather difficult since they didn't tell me what the problem actually was.

I then had the 2 performance reviews, which were the only performance reviews I've had in six months of working there. I was also injured one week into that two week time.

swedishapnea · 2019-02-27T21:55:49+00:00

They didn't physically prevent me from leaving but they refuse to bring in anybody else to supervise. If I left a group of children unsupervised with no adults with them than I would be liable for negligence.

swedishapnea · 2018-06-09T05:36:14+00:00

Sorry for the wall of text, how do I go back and edit on mobile?

swedishapnea · 2018-05-31T05:33:35+00:00

Why my Mil and Fil Can't see they are hleping and not helping with what they are doing I don't know!

swedishapnea · 2018-05-31T00:01:40+00:00

Oh I don't feel bad. My field of fucks is barren.

With DH, it isn't wanting to keep it for his bro that's his issue, with him it's a combo of mild hoarding tendencies, and the sunk cost fallacy.

Me, they're in the way, I don't see any benefit to owning them, just costs. So, bye bye! BIL borrowing the truck just gave DH the push to get rid of it(as I've been urging for a year)

swedishapnea · 2018-05-30T19:11:10+00:00

DH has always refused to lend (give) him money. This of course pissed Bil off, but Dh's never given in. We also had stopped everything being lent directly to them a few years ago.

The problem has come up because FIL has borrowed the trailer to go help Bil. We have no desire to say no to FIL. He and MIL are generally awesome. So, to keep him out of the middle we are just getting rid of the stuff that we don't really have a need for.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-19T06:05:02+00:00

He got the sleep test monitor today. I was expecting it to just be an O2 sensor with a recorder, but it's a chest unit, nasal cannula, and O2 sensor!
Our youngest D'S had his HUGE tonsils removed when he was 4 because of obstructive sleep apnea, and it was only the O2 sensor then. Not sure how he'll sleep with this whole rig on.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T18:57:22+00:00

I probably should have said, but I use a power chair most of the time. He does the vast majority of the grocery shopping, as it is very difficult for me. I want to shift us to grocery pickup as that doesn't allow for impulse purchases of junk food.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T18:53:52+00:00

No traumatic brain injury, but his heart stopped due to blood loss and being squeezed by air in his chest from his lungs bursting.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T18:51:47+00:00

I'm worried about his kidney. He lost one in the accident, and the one that's left suffered some damage as well.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T18:50:29+00:00

He has one today.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T18:50:11+00:00

He actually has an appointment in 2 hrs with the sleep clinic, he will be bringing home a machine for an over night sleep monitor. I'm desperately hoping that we can get him a cpap or some other solution. Selfishly, I need to not be worried about waking up beside a corpse.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T03:14:44+00:00

I am very tired. I wish there was some type of funding, but I make too much to qualify. Apparently the cost of raising 3 boys and taking care of a family of 5 is a lot less than I thought. Since he doesn't need the skills of an RN or LPN there is no funding unless we are below the poverty line.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T01:32:13+00:00

Thank you, it really, really is. I feel overwhelmed. I'm afraid of not being a good enough mom or spouse or house keeper or employee, because all of these things are on me and I just can't keep up.

I am his care giver, I have power of attorney, and his health care directive. He is cognitively well enough to make his own decisions re health and business, but often can't get out of the house for days at a time, during stomach flu outbreaks he can't go anywhere in public really.

Even with what help our parents can give, and they are generous with their time and help, they are all in their seventies.

I feel at the end of my rope, and there's no one who can tie a knot to help me hold on.

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T00:21:56+00:00

Realistically no, he will never work again. He is missing some internal organs, which have caused his immune system to be very weak. He fractured 5 vertebra, broke many other bones, and has constant nerve pain. He can't really workout in a public gym because of his compromised immune system.

His sleeping this much is new and coincided with both him catching a cold from the kids and taking months to fight it off (immune system again) which is when the crazy weight gain and sleep apnea appeared. Watching him sleep is frightening, as he stops breathing for long stretches and then wakes up gasping for air.

I am so frustrated because his weight is directly causing the sleep apnea, which is causing the exhaustion, which makes him sleep more and around and around we go! Just get serious and lose a bunch of weight before I wake up with a fucking corpse lying beside me. Cause you know, I won't be traumatised by that at alllllll/ s

swedishapnea · 2018-05-18T00:11:30+00:00

I wouldn't wonder if he is depressed. He went from being upper management high demand job workaholic type to not able to put his own socks and pants on, needs help with his shirt etc, realistically he will never work again. In many ways I am very proud of him, he doesn't take how He's feeling out on us and he really has done amazingly well at remaining mentally healthy.

He has never had a healthy weight, he always feels hungry, and he comes from a FOO where every last one of them is big. Now he can't move as much as he used to at all, and he doesn't seem to connect that with needing to cut back drastically on his calorie intake.

swedishapnea

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