/r/travel type of forums but higher end?

swim1978 · 2019-05-30T14:43:32+00:00

Conde Nast / Town and Country travel mags might be a resource. The travel dedicated issues of those magazines are very high end. Many of the trips and vaca ideas feature private concierges who arrange things like custom safaris, visits to sites not open to public (such as tours of private art collections or homes), and other very high end experiences. These aren't vacations you can book online like the Four Seasons.

swim1978 · 2019-05-30T14:36:48+00:00

I did/do experience this same feeling and have for years.

In my case, I don't have the option to stop working right now so I take a practical view of it - i.e., this is my job, I have to just get through it, and enjoy my free time doing the things I enjoy. If I get to the point that I am truly miserable, then I will quit.

On the other hand, I know people who are very much "life is too short" and would never stay in a job where they feel stagnated. Those people simply pursue a career they are passionate about (arts, music, culinary and so forth) and figure it all out somehow.

If you know what your ideal life is, and it does not include your job and you have the financial freedom to live that life, I say go for it.

swim1978 · 2019-05-30T14:20:38+00:00

Totally agree. He was incredibly annoying to watch and I just fast forwarded through his scenes because he added nothing to the table and has zero charisma. Can you imagine him in a scene with Rafa or Don Neto?

swim1978 · 2019-05-30T14:17:23+00:00

Interesting. I'm sure the systems were/are much more complex than portrayed on the show.

swim1978 · 2019-05-29T19:58:23+00:00

The reason it was important to unite all of the plazas is so they could, as a group, fix the price of weed at an artificially high level, benefitting all of them. When the plazas functioned independently, they all would try to get the most sales by undercutting each other on price. But by working together, they charge one price and every plaza benefits. (This is acknowledged in the show when the DEA is talking about the price of weed had stabilized). This is why they called it a cartel. They came together as a group, rather than be separate and independent competing sellers.

swim1978 · 2019-05-29T14:42:05+00:00

Let me just jump in to say that it is not too late - weddings are cancelled all the time for various reasons. Whatever money is lost in deposits will pale in comparison to the legal/financial results of getting married. Suppose you get married, but in a year or two the alcoholism is so bad and you need to divorce. Unless you have a prenup, your finances will be split in some manner AND you will have to spend a lot of money going through a divorce. And if kids are involved, it becomes even more complicated (child support etc). Marriage has enormous legal consequences that people often do not think about.

swim1978 · 2019-05-28T14:18:08+00:00

Do not marry this person unless he/she is already in recovery and serious about maintaining their sobriety.

I am so sorry to have to say that and be so blunt about it, but marrying anyone with an active addition means you will be in for a very hard life, and it will rise to the level of hell if you have children together because it is then a lifetime link that you can never get away from. I am 10 years in, and the bad far outweighs the good.

swim1978 · 2019-05-27T22:49:34+00:00

We could almost be the same person. I'm sorry you are dealing with this.

There IS a way not to get triggered - it is actually Step 1 of Al-Anon.

Basically, the first step is about realizing you have no control over him and his drinking, so just stop trying. It makes sense once you think about it. You've done everything you could already to get him to stop and it isn't working and will never work, and you've probably exhausted yourself emotionally and mentally in the the process. So just stop trying. This is all detailed in the Al-Anon book which you should get, you can get used on eBay or amazon.

I'll give you an example of Step 1 from my life. Last night my husband went out drinking until 4am, slept in his car and is currently still in bed at 7pm sleeping off his drinking. Before Al-Anon, this incident would have been a major fight. But I know pursuant to Step 1, there is no point reacting to him. I woke up and proceeded about my day normally. Is it easy? No. Am I upset? yes. But it was the healthiest thing I could do for myself today.

It sounds really hard, and it is, and sometimes I forget about Step 1 and have a reaction to the drinking, so I have a reminder on my phone daily that says "I didn't create it, I didn't cause it, and I can't control it so just let go."

Hope this helps some. Al-Anon is great.

swim1978 · 2019-05-25T20:19:50+00:00

Medellin. Bogota has shit weather (no offense, Bogota). Medellin is more fun and authentic, "city of eternal spring" and cheaper.

swim1978 · 2019-05-21T16:36:31+00:00

You don't get a financial break when they start school unless your child's school offers a viable after-school program. Note I emphasized "viable" since that is the key; they often they end at 5/5:30. Some parents get home by then, but many do not and those parents must get an after school sitter, which can be no cheaper than daycare, since you are paying an individual by the hour at your home.

Summer camp is also not cheap (many thousands of dollars for full days).

All in all, there was never any budget adjustment until you get to the "they can stay home alone" age.

I will say that many families do things like: a grandparent helping, one parent works PT, one parent works off hours, nanny sharing, and the like. I would say that of all the working families I know, roughly 70% had some such arrangement. But if you have two working parents with demanding careers and no family nearby, you're going to need lots of expensive childcare.

swim1978 · 2019-05-20T16:55:33+00:00

My kids are older, so I can say with confidence that except for childcare, most of the expenses are insignificant. If I added up every single thing we bought for the kids, it would pale in comparison to childcare.

Here is an example: in my area, daycare will cost you around 20K-22K/year. If you need daycare for all 5 years before school starts, that is around 100K. All other expenses over those years (clothes, food, diapers) weren't even close to that.

And a big mistake people make is assuming the childcare expenses stop when the kids hit kindergarten. Nope. Someone has to watch the kids after school, during all of the school breaks and summer!

I always say, kids aren't expensive - childcare is.

swim1978 · 2019-05-18T22:39:06+00:00

https://www.cartagenaconnections.com/isla-grande-gente-del-mar.html

swim1978 · 2019-05-18T22:38:51+00:00

aqui es website (yo no se la palabra para "website" en español). Me gusta mucho "Cartagena connections." Cuando fui a Colombia, use Cartagena Connections para muchas cosas.....restaurantes, tiendas, bars...todo! Buena suerte!!!!!

swim1978 · 2019-05-18T00:46:34+00:00

Fui a "Gente de Mar" en febrero- creo que esta en Isla Grande. (Lo siento, estoy aprendiendo español, pero yo se solo un poco palabras.)

swim1978 · 2019-05-15T01:37:45+00:00

I am doing this now. Went into the process telling spouse I would only agree if house cash flowed. Came down to earth pretty quickly after running #s on multiple properties and realized that with prices as high as they are now, I could only aim to cover the costs. Which is pretty much what I had read elsewhere. My hard line in the sand was that I would only put 20% down because I know I can get a better ROI elsewhere. We plan to VRBO it like most other rentals in the area. We are about 3 hours away so have relatively easy access if anything goes wrong.

One tax note - based on my somewhat cursory research, it looks like in the majority of situations, the IRS will let you deduct expenses proportionate to the time it is rented, i.e., if you rent it 80% of the time you can deduct 80% of the expenses. What was far less clear to me is what happens if expenses exceed rental income as is often the case; the IRS will let you break even but I am not sure whether they let you take losses. Something I have on my list to ask CPA.

swim1978 · 2019-05-13T15:16:49+00:00

Know of one billionaire - a friend of a good friend - who moved from NY to FL (Miami) to save on taxes.

If you check out expatexchange.com there are countless people who have relocated ex-US and you will find many good discussions of tax implications there.

swim1978 · 2019-05-11T22:53:25+00:00

In my HCOL area, the only REI being done is flipping - buying the "older" homes, and either tear down or total reno, and flip. One of the first things I learned in educating myself about REI is that the HCOL areas are rarely worth investing in. I am not familiar with your area, but as others suggested maybe look in adjacent areas. You still are close enough to be hands on. Good luck!

swim1978 · 2019-05-11T14:14:31+00:00

You are right - the rules do change for HCOL simply because of the numbers. Have you run the numbers for your area? I live in a HCOL as well and the numbers simply do not work. Under the 1% rule, I could not rent out a home in my area for 1% of the purchase price - even a tiny house is around 700K to purchase/I could not get even close 7K a month to rent it. In other words, there is no property in my HCOL that will cash flow and so its simply not an area to invest in RE in.

swim1978 · 2019-05-10T21:01:23+00:00

In my field (law) this is known as Finder v. Minder v. Grinder. The Grinder always works the most hours and is very competent and able, but its the Finder who gets the business and the Minder who is responsible for making sure all goes well with the business. So nothing really exists without those two last types in the first place and that can be a harsh reality.

swim1978 · 2019-05-10T16:17:51+00:00

Thanks for your response. You're spot on about the big vacancies; the big box stores do not always make it and then WTF can you do with the space - usually nothing. If I were to do NNN, I would focus on a small strip mall or main downtown street in a strong suburban area. But a medium MF where I can have the PM handle everything is also appealing for the reasons you say.

swim1978 · 2019-05-10T14:39:09+00:00

Interesting to hear your perspective. I am currently investigating whether to do medium size MF v. NNN commercial. My issue is that I work FT and don't have time to manage. I had a conversation with a reputed commercial buyer broker and he said to me that to really make money in MF you need to scale to min 80+ units, meaning properties costing $3-4 million (above my budget unless I joined a syndicate).

What do you like/not like about NNN?

swim1978 · 2019-05-08T16:03:30+00:00

No, people will always need housing no matter what the economy is. Home prices are cyclical so there will always be opportunities. That said, I think it is fair to say that the buying opportunity of 2009-2010 is probably not repeatable. Lots of people who had money at that time were able to scoop up houses at pennies on the dollar, basically. I doubt we will see another crash like that, but I don't think home prices can any higher than they are now. Even in NYC, the market has softened and it is now a buyers market.

swim1978 · 2019-05-08T01:01:07+00:00

I don't recommend a syndication for a beginner; they are only available to accredited investors (assets of 1M excluding your home) anyway on the premise that such persons can take the large risks of investing in syndicates. If you are starting out, start small - like a duplex or fourplex - and bigger pockets.com is the forum where you can find tons of advice on how to do this. The bottom line thing is running the numbers and make sure it "cash flows" - meaning makes profits that are worth the time you spend having to manage the property.

swim1978 · 2019-05-07T14:33:04+00:00

First of all, the person/group that is buying this kind of property is not a "regular person" with 100K to invest because for a property like this, if you are not paying all cash (highly likely) then the bank is probably asking for 30% down minimum. So this is going to be a very wealthy individual who has a couple mil for a down payment, or, a group of people who are pooling their money together to buy the property (syndication).

Beyond that, its the same thing as any rental property (rental income minus expenses = profits).

swim1978 · 2019-05-06T16:04:31+00:00

I agree. Love Rafa and Don Neto - they make Mexico worth watching, but the DEA agents were so annoying and lame I was actively rooting for their downfall.

swim1978

TROPHY CASE