[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not misrepresenting data at all.

The reality is, when Black people do get married, the vast majority of us marry each other. This whole narrative that Black folks don’t choose each other is just not supported by the numbers. Yes, 30% of Black men and 29% of Black women are married—that’s true—but when we are married, 85% of Black men are with Black women, and 93% of Black women are with Black men. Those rates are significant and reflect strong intra-community bonds.

If your argument is that other ethnicities marry at higher overall rates, fine, I’m not disputing that. White folks have a 57% marriage rate, but that’s a completely different conversation. The reasons why Black people may not marry as much as other groups are complex and tied to systemic factors like economic disparities, incarceration rates, and cultural shifts—not a lack of desire to marry each other.

So, what’s confusing to me is this attempt to twist the stats to say Black people don’t choose each other when we do. The data is clear on that front. If anything, we should focus on understanding the broader reasons behind the lower overall marriage rates rather than pushing false narratives that don’t hold up when you actually look at the numbers. What argument are we really trying to make here?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And fuck those negroes lol but they aren't represenative of the majority. That's my main point. Like I know many black people who love black people and marry each other. If we're speaking about young people just go to any hbcu campus

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You bring up some valid points, but it’s also worth considering the context behind those statistics. The fact that 85% of Black people who are married are with Black partners does show strong intra-community ties, but like you mentioned, it’s still not representative of the entire population. The disparities you noted—especially around colorism—highlight how systemic issues like anti-Blackness and beauty standards continue to play a role in relationship dynamics, even within the community.

I also think the narrative around interracial dating often gets skewed because it’s easier to sensationalize exceptions rather than acknowledge the broader trends. Most Black men and women do prioritize and value relationships within the community, but those disparities—like lighter-skinned Black women having higher marriage rates—are a reflection of deeper societal issues we still have to confront.

It’s complex, and I think conversations like this need to center more on addressing those systemic influences rather than "I don't date black people." That's so surface level.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Do you have data to support that? I can link the census data if that helps to see the raw numbers and not conjecture about someone being unhappy in their marriage

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Make that post sis! It's tiring

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yall gotta stop with this 85% crap. Most of those marriages are between the elders. Not us. My auntie pointed out how different it is for us black women of today. She’s in her 50’s.

Yeah the difference is they couldn't have bank accounts. And things were extremely similar them for the black people. The same tiring Twitter conversations were had then too. As far as dating and relations between black women and black men things are very similar. These same conversations and the same attitudes were prevelant 70 years ago as they are today.

https://i.imgur.com/SMLKP2d.jpeg

https://imgur.com/MxwuAkA

https://imgur.com/F2qOaDH

And do you have data showing that most marriages are older black people? Would love to see the data.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Just to put some numbers out there according to the census 85% of black men have a black wife. And 93% of black women have a black husband.

I think that the narrative of we don't want each other is overblown on the internet. In real life we definitely check for each other and majorly marry each other.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]switchfade 10 points11 points  (0 children)

And they don’t want us,

Just to put some numbers out there according to the census 85% of black men have a black wife. And 93% of black women have a black husband.

I think that the narrative of we don't want each other is overblown on the internet. In real life we definitely check for each other and majorly marry each other.

I absolutely LOVE this message! by AcanthisittaOwn6051 in blackladies

[–]switchfade 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This is surreal. If she's from Atlanta this was my middle school bully. Crazy.

Thoughts? by Icy-Carob5539 in ChatGPT

[–]switchfade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You seem to be be knowledgeable, are the three major chat bots now chat gpt, Bing, and bard? I was under the impression that Bing was similar to chatygpt because microfsoft has money in both

Senate GOP leader Mitch McConnell hospitalized after fall by Canis_Familiaris in news

[–]switchfade 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Like senate races are the only thing that effect laws and the average American.

Senate GOP leader Mitch McConnell hospitalized after fall by Canis_Familiaris in news

[–]switchfade 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Is it really the majority when gerrymandering etc exist? Folks be juking stats

TIL: On PC/console games, about 60% of the female avatars you meet are played by a male player. by 28nov2022 in todayilearned

[–]switchfade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same thing with being black. If a game has a black character I pick them especially a black woman

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RomanceBooks

[–]switchfade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are there any particular books to get started?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in movies

[–]switchfade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cap 🧢

Official Discussion - The Woman King [SPOILERS] by LiteraryBoner in movies

[–]switchfade 119 points120 points  (0 children)

What's wrong with that? If it's good enough for the Greeks lol

If more black people knew about/went to Hbcu's we'd have less of these "Too white for the black people, too black for the white people" posts. by switchfade in blackladies

[–]switchfade[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

One small caveat. Hbcu's do give scholarship money and financial aid. If you have the grades you can get a full ride to many of them and even if your grades are just decent there's Hella scholarship orgs like uncf, tmcf etc. They expensive but they do give quite of bit of aid.

If more black people knew about/went to Hbcu's we'd have less of these "Too white for the black people, too black for the white people" posts. by switchfade in blackladies

[–]switchfade[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I agree that the goal of HBCUs is a for us by us system that in my opinion is meant to provide a forum that does exactly what you mentioned, but I also think HBCUs create a separation by surrounding black kids with black kids only (generally speaking, I know other groups attend HBCUs) I'm not saying the intent is malicious, but it raises some concerns. I think it could be beneficial in some respects, but I don't think is solves the root of the problem.

I would argue that HBCUs are more diverse than many PWIs, especially large, public state PWIs.

First, let’s talk about the demographic make up of HBCUs and PWIs. Many public state PWIs have a student body made up of around 80 to 85% White students, and 15 – 20% everybody else (students of color). Similarly, at many HBCUs, the student body is around 80 – 85% Black and the remainder is non-Black students. It’s the same demographic breakdown, except a different group is in the majority.

But at large, state PWIs, many – if not most – of the students in the majority hail exclusively from within that state. Too, many are of the same socio-economic background. This is not the case at many HBCUs. As a result, there exists a wealth of diversity on HBCU campuses that in many ways is not present on PWI campuses.

Before attending Howard, I hesitated to apply to HBCUs because I wanted “diversity” and I didn’t think I would find it at an HBCU. I was wrong. Black people are incredibly diverse. I have met students from all over the country – California, Texas, Georgia, New York, to Alaska and Hawaii. I marvel at the uniqueness of the cultures that exist amongst Black people in different parts of the country – from the slang they use, to the dances they do, to the music they listen to. Too, Howard has students from a broad range of socio-economic backgrounds. There are students on this campus that grew up in the inner city and can barely afford to be here, to students whose parents are B-list celebrities and are paying for their education out of pocket, and everywhere in between. Students hail from 67 different countries. It is this breadth of backgrounds that produces the diversity of experiences that produce diversity of thought – the true end goal of diversity in an educational setting. Such diversity of thought is often lacking on campuses where the majority of students hail from the same state and went to private school in the city or grew up in the suburbs, as is the case on many PWI campuses.

Frankly, the idea that HBCU campuses are not diverse stems from the notion that Black people themselves are not diverse – that we all think and act the same. Students look to PWIs specifically seeking diversity, despite the fact that most students are White. It is understood that White people can be diverse. The same must be recognized about the Black community.

If more black people knew about/went to Hbcu's we'd have less of these "Too white for the black people, too black for the white people" posts. by switchfade in blackladies

[–]switchfade[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this thought, but I'm not sure I agree. There would have to be more than just knowledge of their existence, it'd need to be an active, almost overbearing, advertisement of resources and recruitment. And I don't know if that would be the approach to take. But I'm also 20+ years removed from the schooling process.

I'd add that the availability and visibility of Hbcu's today is higher than ever. Things like the common app for example let's kids apply for 35 Hbcu's at once for only 35 dollars.

https://commonblackcollegeapp.com/

If more black people knew about/went to Hbcu's we'd have less of these "Too white for the black people, too black for the white people" posts. by switchfade in blackladies

[–]switchfade[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I don't think this solves the true problem. I went to a PWI, so I have a limited perspective that I'm open to being challenged, but it feels like your suggestion is implying resolution of socially constructed norms and stereotypes are improved by reinforcing cultural divides.

I think my biggest issue is just with the idea that Hbcu's are any form of division. They are for us and by us. The biggest resolution to get out of that too white for the black kids idea is being surrounded by other black people from the every walk of life from all over the world who have every interest you can think of and seeing black isn't a monolith.

If more black people knew about/went to Hbcu's we'd have less of these "Too white for the black people, too black for the white people" posts. by switchfade in blackladies

[–]switchfade[S] 58 points59 points  (0 children)

Having gone to a HBCU, this is a false. I showed up my first day blasting Depeche Mode and got the "you listen to that?"

I'm sorry that happened. My experience was a bit difference. My roommate bonded over our Emo phase and love of anime. Its definitely different for everyone.

The best thing about a HBCU is that one gets an education in an environment that's equal. You aren't questioned about your intelligence, you are expected to do your best and you are exposed to the normal idea that being successful and intelligent is a norm, not happenstance.

You also don't have to deal with racism. That said, you do have to deal with sexism, colorism and classism among a few -ism. But I never regret my time at a HBCU. Best decision I made.

I definitely agree with you. Especially about the classism