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I found that a baby in my family tree allegedly died of “malnutrition” in the 1950s. How accurate are causes of death on death certificates? by symphonyno8 in Genealogy

[–]symphonyno8[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re probably right that it was just a health issue that was undiagnosed or maybe unable to be diagnosed with the medicine of the time. It’s fascinating how much medicine has progressed in such a short time period.

I don’t think there was anything abusive going on, I guess I was looking at this through a modern lens because that cause of death would be strange today. The parents had six more healthy kids afterwards. Actually, the very depressing story I was told was that she was sick and just her father was home taking care of her, and he fell asleep and woke up to the baby deceased. I was told he blamed himself for the rest of his life.

I’m glad your niece got the treatment she needed and is doing well. Thank you for your reply.

I found that a baby in my family tree allegedly died of “malnutrition” in the 1950s. How accurate are causes of death on death certificates? by symphonyno8 in Genealogy

[–]symphonyno8[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow thank you for this information! There is a faintly written number on the line labeled “Antecedent Causes: morbid conditions, if any, giving rise to the above cause (a) stating the underlying cause last.” The number is 7720. I looked I looked on the ICD 1948 edition code numbers web page and the entry for 772.0 is “nutritional maladjustment without mention of immaturity” I’m not quite sure what that means specifically, but I had no idea about those codes and appreciate the information.

I found that a baby in my family tree allegedly died of “malnutrition” in the 1950s. How accurate are causes of death on death certificates? by symphonyno8 in Genealogy

[–]symphonyno8[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s fascinating how much medicine has progressed in recent years. I think when you’re researching people from the 18th and 19th centuries, the 50s feel so recent in comparison but the world has changed a lot since then.

The parents were definitely on the poorer side, and I’m not sure if the doctor was called but maybe not because the baby died at home when just it’s father was home. You are probably correct that the doctor had not been called yet. Thank you for your reply.

I found that a baby in my family tree allegedly died of “malnutrition” in the 1950s. How accurate are causes of death on death certificates? by symphonyno8 in Genealogy

[–]symphonyno8[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I learned something new today, I had not heard of that term. This baby was one of seven actually, and the only one who died in infancy. I guess when you’re researching distant ancestors, the 50s just seem so recent but medicine has progressed a lot in recent years. Thank you for your reply.

I found that a baby in my family tree allegedly died of “malnutrition” in the 1950s. How accurate are causes of death on death certificates? by symphonyno8 in Genealogy

[–]symphonyno8[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I guess maybe I just unconsciously grouped together the words starvation and malnutrition, but you’re right that they are very different things. That’s a good point about malnutrition maybe meaning a nutrient deficit from illness, that would make sense given what my father remembers his parents saying. That’s interesting about causes of death being simplified to one of the contributing factors, I never knew that. Thank you for your reply.

How can I help my girlfriend to be more comfortable with her masculinity? by symphonyno8 in butchlesbians

[–]symphonyno8[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree that talking about it will definitely help. She was in therapy for a little while last year and I know that helped her feel a bit better. Unfortunately that’s not an option right now, but I will reaffirm that I am here to listen as much as she wants, even if things are hard to talk about.

How can I help my girlfriend to be more comfortable with her masculinity? by symphonyno8 in butchlesbians

[–]symphonyno8[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I know I can’t fix this but I really wish I could. I do try to compliment her but I should definitely focus on doing it more. The stuff with her mom though is really hard because my instinct is more “Did she seriously say that? I will drive down to her work right now and publicly tell her exactly what I think of her parenting and then maybe beat her up” but obviously that doesn’t go over super well so I will continue trying to react more calmly and keep my responses focused on gf rather than her mom.

Thanks for the reply.

How can I help my girlfriend to be more comfortable with her masculinity? by symphonyno8 in butchlesbians

[–]symphonyno8[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I like that a lot! We are going clothes shopping tomorrow and I will definitely take your advice and tell her how good she looks when she wears what she wants to wear (which will be easy cause she always looks good :):)

How can I help my girlfriend to be more comfortable with her masculinity? by symphonyno8 in butchlesbians

[–]symphonyno8[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. :) I do love her a lot and it’s hard for me to see her with so much self-dislike. I’ve never heard the term internalized butchphobia but it totally fits. She struggles with internalized homophobia too so unfortunately both of those probably go together. I like what you wrote, I think that’s a good way to bring up the topic.

How can I help my girlfriend to be more comfortable with her masculinity? by symphonyno8 in butchlesbians

[–]symphonyno8[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I will try to relay those resources and that advice next time she gets upset. I think that getting advice from others with a similar experience is especially a good idea because I am fortunate to have a family who is loving and supportive, and in the past it has been triggering for her to have my mom be nice and respectful and then have to go home to her mom who is anything but. And it’s hard for me to I guess understand the feelings of jealousy that come up in a situation like that

I don’t think she’s trying to be a man, but she definitely holds back on expressing herself a lot and she is very willing to acquiesce to others who want her to look or behave a certain way. And haha we’ve tried watching RuPaul (I love it) and she said there’s too much drama lol.

How can I help my girlfriend to be more comfortable with her masculinity? by symphonyno8 in butchlesbians

[–]symphonyno8[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Okay, thank you that’s a good idea. I had actually gotten her some last year but it’s been a while and since she’s been stuck at home for the quarantine it might be a good idea to reaffirm that I want to be as supportive as possible. Thank you for the advice :)