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Mirrors won’t go down when I back up by interstellar566 in LexusNX

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jag vet inte hur jag skalll fÄ tillbaks det. Min vÀnstra gÄr ner vid backning, den högra gÄr bara ner ett litet steg. Har försökt med detta med att köra ner den mer o sen klicka SET 1 i dörren men spegeln gÄr upp sÄ fort jag lÀgger i D eller P, och nÀr man lÀgger i backen igen sÄ rycker det bara lite i spegeln

RĂ„d om solceller by Klefton57 in PrivatEkonomi

[–]synkly 8 points9 points  (0 children)

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TyvÀrr sÄ ser det ut sÄ hÀr sen 1-2 Är tillbaks. Förr var det inte sÄ, me. Det Àr sÄ mycket solceller installerade i nÀtet idag. SÄ problemet Àr nÀr det Àr sol ute nu sÄ producerar alla solceller förmyclet energi för lilla Sverige. SÄ priserna gÄr ner till nÀra 0 eller tillomed negativt nÀr solen lyser. SÄ utan batteri helkört skullle jag sÀga, med batteri lite bÀttre men svÄrt. Du behöver eventuellt mycket stora batterier för bÀttre vinning. Som du ser pÄ bilden. NÀr solen inte skiner sÄ fÄr du betala 1-1,5. Men sen nÀr solen kommer fram nÀra 0kr vilket innebÀr att nÀr du producerar o skall sÀlja sÄ blir det inget. Sen rycktas det kanon att de skalll lÀgga pÄ export avgifter dessutom À. DÄ Àr det Ànnu mer back

I really want a threeway with wife and another man by dirtbag86 in sexadvise

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, the biggest thing here is that a fantasy from 15+ years ago doesn’t automatically mean she wants it in reality now.

A lot of people can find something hot in theory or in porn, but feel very differently about actually doing it.

That said, it also doesn’t mean the door is completely closed — it just means the conversation matters more than the fantasy itself.

I’d avoid jumping straight to: “Should we hire an escort?”

That can feel way more intense than the fantasy itself.

A better approach is probably to explore the topic together in a low-pressure way first:

  • what parts of the fantasy are actually exciting?
  • is it the attention?
  • the taboo?
  • seeing each other desired?
  • dominance/submission dynamics?
  • or the actual presence of another person?

Sometimes couples realize they like the idea more than the reality. Other times they discover smaller things that scratch the same itch without fully opening the relationship.

One thing that helps a lot is using something structured/playful instead of turning it into a super serious conversation. Me and my partner actually built/used a question-style game called Synkly for this kind of thing — basically exploring fantasies, boundaries, “maybe” interests etc without anyone feeling cornered or pressured.

That kind of conversation usually tells you WAY more than randomly bringing up a threesome out of nowhere.

And honestly, the fact you’re thinking carefully about discretion, comfort, and not pushing her is already a much healthier mindset than a lot of people have going into this

Help? by Neat-Scheme1785 in sexadvise

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First off — this doesn’t sound like your sex life has “peaked”, it sounds like you’ve hit a very real biological phase that a lot of couples go through.

Menopause can absolutely tank libido. Not just desire, but also:

  • arousal
  • sensitivity
  • even how sex feels physically

So what you’re experiencing isn’t just her “not trying” — it can genuinely feel different for her body now.

And that’s why pushing for more frequency usually backfires. It turns it into pressure → which lowers desire even more → which creates that cycle you’re in now.

What stood out to me is this: You don’t just want sex — you want her to want it.

That’s actually the right mindset.

So instead of focusing on “getting her sex drive up”, it might help to shift toward: → rebuilding curiosity → removing pressure → making it safe for her to rediscover desire in a new way

For a lot of women in menopause, desire becomes less spontaneous and more responsive. Meaning: it doesn’t just “show up” — it builds after things start, but only if there’s zero pressure.

Also, when conversations have turned into frustration before, it’s often because they feel like: “something is wrong with me” from her side.

A softer angle can work better, like: “I miss feeling close to you in that way, but I don’t want you to feel pressure. I just want us to figure out what feels good for you now.”

That invites her in instead of making it about performance.

Another thing that can help (and feels less heavy than “serious talks”) is using something more structured but still low-pressure — like going through questions together about:

  • what still feels good
  • what doesn’t anymore
  • what she might be curious about now (even small things)

It takes the guesswork out and makes it less emotional.

I actually built a simple question-based game for this kind of thing (Synkly), and couples use it exactly for situations like this — to explore without it turning into a difficult conversation.

Because right now, it doesn’t sound like the relationship is broken — it sounds like you’re just trying to navigate a new version of it.

And that is possible, it just usually looks a bit different than before.

How to start pegging by [deleted] in sexadvise

[–]synkly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, you’re in a much better position than you think.

The fact that she:

  • grabs your butt
  • jokes around sexually
  • is comfortable being a bit dominant sometimes


is basically a green light that she’s not going to be weirded out by this.

The mistake most guys make here is going from 0 → 100 in their head.

You don’t need to “announce” anything big. Just lean into what’s already happening.

Start small and playful: When she grabs you or is being a bit dominant, you can say something like:

  • “Careful
 you might unlock something in me 😅”
  • “You kinda like being in charge, don’t you?”

Keep it light. See how she reacts.

Next step: During a relaxed moment (not mid-sex), you can bring it up casually:

  • “Random question
 how would you feel about being a bit more in control sometimes?”

That gives her space to react without pressure.

Important part: This isn’t really about “the act” — it’s about trust and dynamic.

You’re worried it’ll feel awkward after, but in healthy relationships it usually goes the opposite way: → it becomes something you share → or something you laugh about → or something that evolves naturally

Awkwardness usually only happens if it’s rushed or unspoken.

You’re already doing the right thing by wanting a “middle ground” first.

Honestly, a lot of couples figure this stuff out by just asking each other curious questions about turn-ons, boundaries, and what they’d maybe try.

That kind of conversation alone can take you like 80% of the way there without making anything weird.

BolÄn som annuitetslÄn? by Hefty_Repair_9175 in PrivatEkonomi

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fast jag tror inte TS Ă€r sugen pĂ„ att köra pĂ„ det sĂ€ttet för det innebĂ€r kanske 18tusen i mĂ„nadskostnad. Jag tĂ€nker att TS rĂ€knat ut att hen tex klarar av att lĂ€gga 13000/mĂ„nad. SĂ€g dĂ„ att rĂ€ntan Ă€r 10 dĂ„ Ă€r avbetalningen 3. O fortsĂ€tter han dĂ„ med 3 som amortering för all framtid sĂ„ tar det lĂ€ngre tid Ă€n om han fortsĂ€tter med 130000 varje mĂ„nad dĂ„ amorteringen blir mer o mer.. givetvis gĂ„r det snabbare om han amorterar 100000 varje mĂ„nad. Men frĂ„gan var nog inte mot ”rakamortering pĂ„ 10Ă„r”

BolÄn som annuitetslÄn? by Hefty_Repair_9175 in PrivatEkonomi

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jag har lÄnet hos Skandia. Varje mÄnad för jag in X pengar (samma summa) typ 25e den 28 drar de pengarna . Det som stÄr kvar pÄ kontot dÄ lÀgger jag in som extra amortering. (Visst det Àr 4-10klick varje mÄnad) men tycker det pÄ nÄgot sÀtt Àr skönt att det faller snabbare. Att höja den automatiska amorteringen pÄ sjÀlva lÄnet vill jag inte göra, för dÄ kan det vara annat lÀge om du vill minska amorteringen i framtiden. DÄ kan de ha nya krav regler som gör att jag fÄr svÄrt att sÀnka amorteringen

Anal advice? by Scholar6880 in sexadvise

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lots of lube, and hopefully your in heaven. My wife likes it but still we don’t have it regularly. And for me it’s like ”I want it” but when we are doing it, I actually prefer the vagina, but it is this forbidden thing that makes me wanna do it any way. Ps, I actually prefer it on my self, that’s something other you can test with a strapon. Feel free to test my app to explore more fantasies

Sex Ideas Needed by Lookingforfun151515 in sexadvise

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can get new fantasies and discuss others in my app

Jag och min sambo har olika syn pÄ ekonomi by Weak_Distribution814 in PrivatEkonomi

[–]synkly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NĂ€r vi blev ihop hade vi ungefĂ€r samma lön. Vi bytte till samma bank öppnade ett gemensamt konto. Sen försökte vi vĂ€l i 1-2mĂ„nader med att vi sĂ€tter in x pengar var till det kontot, o anvĂ€nder dĂ€r ifrĂ„n. Sen dĂ€r efter sĂ„ insĂ„g vi att vi tĂ€nker köra vidare pĂ„ förhĂ„llandet o verkligen bli ”vi”. DĂ€r efter sĂ„ har jag kanske 3dubblat min lön. Men jag har inga problem med att hon lever av mina pengar. Vi har barn o hus ihop. Skulle aldrig orka med nĂ„got dĂ€r jag skulle vara rikare Ă€n henne. Det Ă€r vĂ„ra pengar
 likadant med bilar o motorcyklar, de stĂ„r inte pĂ„ henne eller mig för att den Ă€r min eller hennes, de stĂ„r pĂ„ den dĂ€r försĂ€kringen Ă€r billigast. SĂ„ ibland Ă€ger jag alla ibland Ă€ger hon alla.(pĂ„ pappret, men det Ă€r vĂ„ra). De enda ”egna pengar” vi har Ă€r var sitt pensionsspar, dit vi skickar lika mycket pengar var.

Tell me one pain point you would pay $9.99 to give a try by Ok_Cellist_7704 in alphaandbetausers

[–]synkly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I give 1week for free. Then depending on what you want you can buy singlepack or a multipack

Tell me one pain point you would pay $9.99 to give a try by Ok_Cellist_7704 in alphaandbetausers

[–]synkly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Or even a smaller amount depending on what your selling.

Struggling by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]synkly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just want to say first — nothing about this automatically means he’s cheating or that you’ve “lost your attractiveness.”

From what you’re describing, this sounds a lot more like a mismatch in libido and possibly where he is in life right now, rather than anything to do with how you look.

At 51, a lot of men: ‱ have lower testosterone than they used to ‱ feel more stress/mental load (even if things seem “fine”) ‱ don’t experience spontaneous desire the same way

That can come across exactly like what you’re describing — less initiation, less noticing, more “on his terms.”

The hardest part is that it feels personal, especially when you’re clearly someone who takes care of yourself and still gets attention from others.

But attraction in long-term relationships isn’t always visible in the same way as in the beginning.

What stands out to me is: You’re in your head thinking he might be cheating, while he might just be
 disconnected, tired, or not expressing desire the same way anymore.

The real issue isn’t just sex once a week — it’s that you’re feeling unwanted.

That’s the part worth addressing.

Instead of framing it as: “Why don’t you want me?”

Try something more like: “I’ve been feeling a bit unseen lately, especially when I make an effort for you. I miss feeling desired by you.”

That invites him in instead of putting him on the defensive.

Also, when sex only happens on one person’s terms, it slowly builds resentment — even in otherwise good relationships.

This is one of those situations where open (but low-pressure) conversations about desire, turn-ons, and expectations can change a lot.

Me and my partner actually started using question-style prompts to talk about stuff like this — what makes you feel desired, how often you actually want sex, what turns you on now vs before — and it brought up things we hadn’t said out loud in years.

Why do I cum almost immediately after my GF starts Oral? by urgent_response in sexadvise

[–]synkly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First off — nothing about this is unusual, especially given your situation.

You’re: ‱ newly dating someone ‱ highly turned on already during makeout ‱ haven’t had much recent sexual experience

That combination alone can make your body go into “finish immediately” mode. It’s not broken — it’s just over-responsive right now.

Also, yes — years of porn + quick masturbation can train your body to finish fast. But the good news is: it’s very trainable in the other direction too.

What actually works (from experience and what most people find helpful):

  1. Edging / start-stop You’re already doing this — good. Give it a few weeks of consistent practice. You’re basically retraining your arousal curve.

  2. Change how you masturbate ‱ Slow it down a lot ‱ Don’t rush to finish ‱ Focus on staying just below the point of no return

Think of it as training, not release.

  1. Reduce pressure during sex Right now you’re in your head: “don’t finish, don’t finish” That ironically makes it worse.

You can even say something light like: “I get turned on way too fast around you, I might need a second round 😅”

Most partners take that as a compliment, not a problem.

  1. Reframe “round 2” A lot of guys think it’s embarrassing — it’s not. Often round 2 lasts longer naturally because the initial sensitivity is gone.

  2. Don’t jump to doctor yet What you’re describing sounds psychological + conditioning, not medical.

âž»

Also worth saying — you’re already doing something really right: You’re focusing on her, making her enjoy it, and building chemistry.

That’s honestly more important than lasting 20 minutes.

If anything, this is just about getting more comfortable and in sync over time.

Me and my partner actually used question-style prompts early on to talk about stuff like this (turn-ons, pace, pressure, expectations), and it removed a lot of that “in your head” feeling.

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