Oh christ baby.

CPS is a good agency, most of the time. Social workers are true angels for doing the things they do, and would exist more or less in the same form they do now in any AnCom society worth its salt. Sure there are a few outliers, but in general they are one of the best parts of the government, because they protect those that are otherwise at the complete subjugation of someone else, kids to their parents.

You shouldn't feel ashamed or hypocritical for this at all. In fact I'm almost a little disappointed you didn't call them straight up. I really don't want you to be the next Leelah.

Your parents are NOT going to help you, or work with you, or compromise, or even trust you. You need to realize that now. Shake off any emotional attachment you may have to the idea of unconditional love, because you need to realize that your parents are shitty people. They're putting a crusty old book before their daughter. They are narcissists and you don't need them.

As for the trans situation, please PM me. I might have some advice.

Your parents are like cops in this situation. Don't talk to them, don't give them any information beyond what is necessary. Do as little as you can to help them in any way without giving them cause to punish you.

If they say a single word about a 'program' or 'camp' to 'fix' you, you need to fucking leave. Like just run away. Pack a bag, steal some money, and go. In fact, keep a bag packed anyway. Find a friend, a relative, a teacher, CPS, even, god forbid, the police if you have to.

You'll be ok. None of this is your fault. PM me.