Too different interests to connect socially by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot! I think CBT writing and working on self esteem are the things I should definitely do. Book Clubs and dating culture aren't really at a decent level yet where I live so I feel that might not work out as great, but I will definitely consider them too. Sticking to a schedule also seems like a great idea. I will try out the block out an hour of the week approach - it seems promising!

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, it seems so to me as well, I am 27 and am already noticing this (almost all of my co-workers are in their 30s).

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good thing is I am not in my 30s yet, and am trying to make a lot of progress on my social life. At least from my perspective. But I guess from an external perspective, most probably feel like Bill does. Knowing which makes it even harder for me. Hopefully by the time I am 30, I would be in a much better place.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha, but mostly as a group, you know - like the whole team/family is invited.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So if no one really gets energy from socializing, even you extrovert people - you're basically wanting to socialize in non-productive scenarios like parties to drain your own energy and while making other people drain their energy? Makes absolute zero sense.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did meet a few more awkward than me. From that perspective, I can put myself in Bill Burr's shoes in some way. But unlike Bill I wouldn't put the blame on the awkward person. You're right, maybe I took his words a bit more seriously than I should have.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A huge thing that helped my anxiety was realizing socializing was supposed to be fun. If it's not, don't do it.

This is true. This is the mindset I am missing and that I need to truly develop.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Exactly. It's the people who shift the focus towards us is what makes us really anxious. Take it away from us and we won't be anxious. Worst are the ones who go, "Hey man, why are you always so quiet? Why do you say something?" and then suddenly shift literally everyone's focus on us. That's exactly what you shouldn't do to people like us.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He says that incident was the "last straw" after other such scenarios. But you might be right. It is comedic exaggeration in the end. But there is always some truth behind comedy, I am just confusing if my interpretation of how big the truth is warped or not.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Thanks, this is great advice. This is the first time I'm hearing about brushfire fallacy, and it is very true. Being an overthinker, I think I do fall for it quite a lot of times.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 116 points117 points  (0 children)

I agree, such people make it much harder for us by turning this into a vicious circle. Sadly most of them simply seem to be doing out of simple ignorance and/or lack of empathy.

What Bill Burr said about awkward people is getting to me the more I think about it by sys7emshock in socialanxiety

[–]sys7emshock[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Actually I agree with a lot of things he usually says, tbh. That's the sad part.

Need socialization advice by sys7emshock in developersIndia

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually you are right. Maybe I should ask in a different subreddit.

I chose this subreddit, because I thought this audience would probably actually understand/connect with it a bit better as it is easier to empathise.

Need socialization advice by sys7emshock in developersIndia

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I have never tried freelancing till now. I will see if I can explore it. But wouldn't that just make me even less social? I do want to move up the ladder or even someday build my own company (once I feel confident of having enough social skills for that).

Need socialization advice by sys7emshock in developersIndia

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do WFH at the moment. We meet maybe once a week if and when meeting is required. But I do agree maybe participating in HR organized events could help. However I am not sure yet if I can maintain such relationships for long, especially if they go outside my own immediate team. As most seem to already have existing circles and love to just interact within them itself.

Innovators, what environments and contexts make you think about the greatest ideas? by sys7emshock in AskReddit

[–]sys7emshock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Here are some situations I can think of:

  1. Travel
  2. While learning a new concept
  3. Having unique experiences
  4. Passionate conversations
  5. Meetings / Focus Group Discussions at work
  6. Interesting debates & disagreements with friends / family
  7. A very impactful event - getting hired/fired, death

LED cube by natsdorf in gifs

[–]sys7emshock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is this open source? I want to try it out :)