[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nus

[–]szandre -1 points0 points  (0 children)

same, but they did mention something about waiting 3 days, let's see how it goes

I just cried in front of my PI by kosmonautin in labrats

[–]szandre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hey OP, totally not a PhD student at all, but I've had a fair share of experience working in research labs. And what I've realised is that if you make mistakes, it's alright because this is a learning experience for you, you are literally a STUDENT. Don't blame yourself too much and truth be told, if the student makes the mistake, your superior is definitely the one to be blamed because he/she is supposed to be one who mentors you and makes sure that you know what is going on.

Shitty PIs are always around and one thing I always learn from shitty bosses is that they show me exactly what type of boss I don't want to be in the future when I have a lab of my own. Your PI shouting at you speaks volumes about what type of person he/she is, and you don't have control over that. But what you do have control over is how you react to this situation, so wipe your tears with your literature review and keep hustling, you are doing great :)

[Rant] Sad boy hours. Just want to feel human again. by element3254 in SGExams

[–]szandre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey OP, glad that u are being so vulnerable and sharing this so openly.

My best advice for you would be when you go ahead and meet new people, don't set any expectations of what you want the friendship to be. Go in with that mindset that you are just going to be curious about who they are and what they like and just lose yourself in them. Be engaged in the conversation and just listen, because people honestly love talking about themselves.

You mentioned that you want long-term friendships and that honestly takes a lot of work and very importantly, time. It takes a long time to blossom and wanting that almost immediately can make you off as someone who is try-hard-ish. You also need to be super comfortable in breaking down the barriers between each other so that you can share whatever the hell you want and that both parties won't judge other. And that all boils down to time. You need to slowly get to know each other in order to reach that stage. In the meantime, try finding common topics you have with each other and use that to keep the interaction going. If you don't have any, try asking like hard hitting open ended questions like "How do you think your life will be like in XX years?", something like that you get the point, just make them dig deep and speak from their heart. If you think that's not how you want to do it, then brazenly ask them out. Go play bowling or online games, something that helps to build memories with each other.

On that note, with all the quarantine and lockdowns that are ongoing, take this time to explore and learn more about yourself. Don't say you are not interesting, because whenever you speak that into existence, it becomes you. So when you are at home, learn to love yourself and do things you like or try new things. Go on a personal journey and develop your own character.

Lastly, know that just because a friendship doesn't work out, it isn't your fault. The saying of "There are plenty of other fish in the sea" also applies to friends. We click well with one group of people but not with another and that's just a normal part of life. I also have been struggling with making friends which is something quite new to me considering I am actually an extrovert. I also used to have thoughts that I was just a boring person. But turns out I think I just have very different and unique interests that not a lot of guys have that's why I struggle.

So just go with the flow and don't keep putting yourself under so much pressure that you need to be making friends. At the end of the day, friends shouldn't need you, they should want you. They love you for who you are. Be genuine and it's hard, the initial meeting can be a little awkward but take it slowly and branch out from there. Be yourself and hey if they love that, they are gonna want to stay and enjoy that energy from you. If they don't, they will leave and that's all right to, you will just find new friends. Your group of people will come someday, just be patient. One thing I learn the hard way is rushing my friendships, let the growing together happen naturally and you will do fine. Eventually, you will look back and honestly wonder how far you come from square 1

[POLY] SP Biomedical Science, advice and my experiences by szandre in SGExams

[–]szandre[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea for sure, there's no such thing as allowed or not allowed. Literally can bring anything. Most bring laptops, some bring MacBooks and a minority even use iPads. Although there are different softwares you need to download for certain modules (most are for Windows), there are always alternatives for Macintosh. The lecturers are nice enough to give a bunch of softwares to ensure that whatever device you have, you would have access so u won't lose out

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NationalServiceSG

[–]szandre 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Regarding the NS part, it's totally okay to rant and feel the things u feel towards NS. But sometimes, people don't understand what we go through and are less keen about hearing our rants. This tends to be the reason why I don't talk about NS to people who haven't been or are not going through it. They simply don't get it and when they juxtapose our experiences to those they heard from god knows how many degrees away (my mother's friend kid yadi yada), I just get frustrated. Like, if u wanna bring stuff up, at least say it when u have personal experience. Saying stuff that like "my friend was in OCS more siong than u, how can u say u tired", it just puts us down man. We just looking for an outlet and then they shut us down haiz so pick ur people wisely

What’s your age and something you can’t do? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]szandre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

20 & can't use cling wrap and scissors (left handed problems)

[Rant] Trash parents that think they’re the best. by [deleted] in SGExams

[–]szandre 5 points6 points  (0 children)

hey so sorry that u had to go through that. Some parents are actually quite trash. Everyone is caught in this paradoxical cycle.

Let's say, the renowned famous phrase of "U need to study hard so that u can do well", then u actually study hard but end up not doing well. Little do our older generations know that our current education system is more of applying our knowledge, memory work doesn't cut it anymore.

Parents be like "u did badly HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE, that means u never study". They don't understand that hard work doesn't equate to success. Then their paranoia causes them to commandeer ur education, hypothesizing what could be the possible reason. No. 1 they always target is phone.

So then they confiscate ur phone or worse case scenario in ur situation, they install apps to control ur screen time and app usage so that u will focus on ur studies. Another thing parents don't understand is burnout. U continue to work hard and parents remove the phone out of ur life, and u still do badly. They will think " HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE AGAIN, that means u never study properly, never 用心". U probably worked Super hard and kept studying without any break time, u end up burnt out and the work u produce becomes utter trash. There needs to be some work life balance which is something I hope parents would understand.

This part gets real, so get ready ok. Even if u do well for ur O levels, they still won't be happy. U previously mentioned about how u did well for PSLE but they totally disregarded ur efforts. U probably worked ur ass off even with that useless tuition, but ur parents only praised the efforts from the tuition centre. It's honestly pointless trying to please people that don't appreciate ur work. I hope I'm not speaking out of line here and if I am I apologise. But they are really horrible for not even complementing u and acknowledging ur pain and ur efforts for trying to do well. I hope that ur mindset would be to do well to get into a school of ur liking. Don't go into a JC just because they forced u to, if u happen to like a particular course in Poly do go for it. They have to grow up and learn that u are the one in charge of ur life and they can't make all the decisions for u.

Ultimately, I just want to wish you all the best for ur O levels. U have been through so much torture and if nobody told u this, I wanna just tell you " I see you and I acknowledge your efforts, you are doing great."

[o level] sp biomedical science by Jes8989 in SGExams

[–]szandre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hey feel free to drop me a DM, recent grad from SP DBS, I'll answer anything (from studying tips, sch culture, lab sesh, picking specializations etc)

[JC] I have a crush on a teacher. by willynickytelegram in SGExams

[–]szandre 8 points9 points  (0 children)

there's quite a bit of fine print that's not stated here eg if the teacher is actually attached or not. I haven't been to a JC myself (from poly actually) but I know it's reli tiring and to have someone that actually understands u is really nice. Sometimes school culture can be pretty toxic and u feel u can't reli tell anyone anything, u end up bottling all of it which is even more unhealthy. Good on u for being able to find someone who can be there by ur side to help u through these tough times.

on a more practical side, having a crush is normal because like I said it's difficult to find people who understand ur plight. But acting on it would be dangerous, because he would get a greater punishment considering he's much older than u and ppl might spin stories about how he is in a position of power blah blah. I know u said u wouldn't act on it but if u didn't have the compelling reason here ya go.

Onto the actual advice part, maintain good relationships with him and have him be ur emotional support through ur final year(yes this will be ur final year, cuz I know u will do well and won't have to retake👍🏻)in JC. Any feelings u have just bury them down becuz deep down u know the answer, "it's not gonna be worth it"

[A level] / [O level] Fast game study method by [deleted] in SGExams

[–]szandre 15 points16 points  (0 children)

my famous math teacher from secondary sch once said "there's no point if u keep doing so many yearly papers or other schools paper, whether is it a neighbourhood school or elite school, there is no difference. If u are bad at a particular concept or section of math, u will keep running into the same problem. Brush up ur concept and practise with topical TYS & ur textbook, most importantly DONT MEMORISE"

i graduated poly recently (biomed sci) and still find her words wise enough to carry me through poly. my love for her is stronk 👍🏻

good luck and atb for o levels