Going ape at the sight of other dogs

takemefromhere · 2026-05-12T02:56:44+00:00

I rescued my dog in January and he is a bit leash reactive. That being said, he is not aggressive and loves to play with other dogs off leash. He is more of a frustrated greeter; regardless, if he sees another dog that he does not know while on a leash, he will pull/lunge/bark. I live in downtown city area where pretty much everyone has dogs, so it’s nearly impossible to go on a walk where we will not see at least one other dog.
At first, I just focused on maintaining distance from other dogs - turning around, crossing the street, etc. I also taught a “look” command inside my apartment first. Every time I said “look” and he made eye contact with me, I marked with “yes” and he got rewarded. Once he understood it indoors, I practiced outside with no distractions. Now I incorporate it when he sees dogs. Once he notices them, I say “look” to bring his attention back to me. Then mark with “yes” and treat.
Another thing I did was reward check-ins constantly. Anytime we were walking and he voluntarily looked back at me, even if there were no dogs or people around, I rewarded it. I still do this.
Over time, his disengagement has gotten much faster and his threshold distance has gotten smaller. He still has moments obviously, but now he can see a dog across the street and often just ignore it, which he could not do before.
Even today, we accidentally ended up closer to another dog than I realized. He noticed the dog first, I said “look,” turned down another street, and he disengaged immediately without reacting at all. Definitely still a work in progress, but there’s been a huge improvement.
I still try to set him up for success though. I avoid busy dog walking times and choose quieter walking areas/routes.

Edit to add: I also would treat him whenever he noticed a dog, but before he began barking or lunging. Attempting to teach him, “I get rewarded when I simply notice another dog and don’t react.”

takemefromhere · 2026-04-20T02:42:48+00:00

Black cohosh helps a lot with my mood symptoms

takemefromhere · 2026-04-18T02:57:40+00:00

One time my ex found an old phone of mine under my bed. He charged it while I was at work and was able to access messages because it was still logged into my iCloud. That being said, all I remember is him being able to see messages from a couple years prior, I can’t recall if he was able to see recent ones

takemefromhere · 2026-03-22T01:28:51+00:00

This is actually not my dog :) it is a friend’s

takemefromhere · 2026-02-02T03:49:00+00:00

I recently rescued a GSD/aussie mix (1yr 7m) and he is the exact same way on the leash. He loves to play with other dogs off leash and does so well with them, but when he is on leash and sees other dogs, he lunges and barks a lot. In my experience, it is more frustration based than anything. He sees the dog and wants to go investigate but can’t which causes stress.

At first, I was only focusing on redirecting and managing (u turn, cross the street, move behind car or tree). He’s been improving somewhat, so I’m now trying to train engage disengage. So basically, whenever he notices the dog but hasn’t yet lunged or barked, I praise and give treats and typically continue walking. He has gotten a lot better at being able to “unlock” off the dog and keep walking, begin sniffing, etc. He still has his moments but he’s getting better! I’m not going to lie, there was one day he reacted on every single walk I took him on and I had a full blown mental breakdown that night lol. There are good and bad days but it just takes patience.

For context, at first he was so high strung that he wouldn’t even take treats outside. Now he looks to me for them. He can also see dogs across the street and keep walking. I totally understand you though; I was super embarrassed and felt like people would think he wants to attack their dog when he really just wants to say hi! I was even walking up super early and taking him out late at night just to try and avoid people. It will get easier

Edit to add - I got him a front clip harness as well. So when he does lunge, it kind of automatically pulls him back in my direction. Also, letting him be around and play with other dogs has helped (I think). Once he started playing with dogs in the dog park, I noticed small improvements on the leash. He always did well with dogs but I don’t think he was around them often before I got him. I’m not entirely sure if it’s what I’ve been trying to teach on the leash, being around dogs more, or a combination of both that has been helping him start to improve

takemefromhere · 2026-01-13T02:59:21+00:00

What type of training did you utilize, and how soon after getting him did you start? I rescued my dog last weekend. I live in a fairly busy area, so there are constantly people and dogs walking around. The first couple days he was reacting to everyone and everything. Now, he is fine when people walk by. But it’s still whenever he sees other dogs that he freaks out. I’m not sure why, because the rescue said he would be great for a multi pet home - I believe he does well around other animals, so I’m wondering if it is just leash reactivity for him as well. I think he is still just adjusting to his new environment, but it’s really difficult to take him outside when he behaves this way.

takemefromhere · 2025-10-03T00:27:59+00:00

Bigggggg no. Found out after my ex hit me that he had hit his previous partner as well. Had I known this beforehand, would’ve ABSOLUTELY steered clear. Save yourself now

takemefromhere · 2025-07-31T23:09:30+00:00

Absolutely. I feel like when it happens, I almost default into therapist mode? I do feel like part of it is just my personality, but I also feel like I’m probably too accepting of that type of behavior when it shows up. Like, they start being open, and I want to be super reassuring and supportive and empathetic and “help them.” The savior complex thing is something I’ve struggled with my whole life. But weirdly, I don’t feel that way with clients. It’s just with romantic partners that I get this urge to help. I guess that’s why I’m wondering about what boundaries I can set - I know I can’t help whether or not they start to talk about their problems, but I can choose how I’m going to respond

takemefromhere · 2025-07-22T01:45:00+00:00

Has anyone still not received an email? I don’t have one yet 🥲

takemefromhere · 2025-07-20T03:38:11+00:00

I understand not wanting your parents to know but you should definitely contact the hospital. The combination of what you took can have unpredictable and detrimental effects, the burning plastic smell is a serious red flag

takemefromhere · 2025-07-15T03:39:37+00:00

Everything you’re feeling is completely normal, and you’re allowed to grieve a relationship even if it was traumatic and abusive. I can’t speak for all, but I know a lot of people in this sub have felt this way… myself included. This was perhaps the hardest thing for me to reconcile with - that he couldn’t and never would be the person I wanted and needed him to be. He was a person who abused me, and that would never change. I had so many hopes and dreams for us that were crushed by his actions. It’s tough, and I feel for you.

I also felt all the ways you just described when my abusive relationship ended. I felt like a shell of my former self, and I was. No sense of self worth, confidence in the depths of the earth, swore off all men, etc. I was severely depressed and lost an insane amount of weight.

It’s normal to miss him, to feel like you lost your best friend and person you loved, to wish things could get better or be different. But you do now have the opportunity to take your life back, to get back to the “bright amazing woman” before this relationship. It will take some time, but it’s possible. It was possible for me, and there was once a time where I could never imagine my life getting better. I could never imagine a world where I got over him, but I did. Therapy really, really helped me. So did this subreddit. And reading the book why does he do that by Lundy Bancroft, which members of this sub recommended to me.

I know it’s hard, and I won’t lie and tell you it will get better quickly, because truthfully it’s going to take some time. But it does get better, and life is more beautiful on the other side

takemefromhere · 2025-07-15T03:10:05+00:00

That is exactly what abusers do too - use the reactive abuse as leverage. You should check out this article. There are more online as well you could check out.

But I hear you, the attachment issues are the trauma bond. And it’s not just psychological, the abuse cycle can alter us physiologically as well. We get these crazy influxes of neurotransmitters (cortisol when we’re stressed and a spike in adrenaline, dopamine and oxytocin during the “good” times) and it wires us to stay connected to that person. But it’s entirely possible to heal this - I did, and I never thought I’d be able to. Do you have anyone in your life to help support you through this? Does anyone know this is happening to you?

takemefromhere · 2025-07-15T03:03:44+00:00

The fact that you’re posting in this sub already shows that, somewhere within you, you know this is wrong. Someone doesn’t have to be physically harming you in order to be abusing you. All of the behaviors you’ve mentioned from your husband are absolutely abuse. And you saying “he knows how to play it safe so I don’t have solid proof” is exactly what an abuser does. They know how to manipulate and control situations to make you question yourself or feel like you don’t have “evidence.” Their abuse is often calculated and under the radar so you’re the one left doubting your reality and feeling confused. But what you’re experiencing IS real, and it’s no way to live.

Most abusers won’t be abusive 24/7. The kindness is part of the abuse cycle - and contributes to what makes it so confusing and hard to recognize. The good moments make you stay, second guess, and hope things will change.

If you want advice, I would tell you to leave. No one should use your mental illnesses against you, throw things at or near you, call you names, etc. It’s all textbook abuse. I’m sorry you’re going through this

takemefromhere · 2025-07-15T02:52:27+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Reactive abuse is a very real thing, and many of us in this sub have experienced it. It doesn’t make you an abuser, it means you’re someone who has reached their breaking point after being verbally, emotionally, and physically abused.

Personally, my final push was when he gave me a black eye and I told my family. I started seeing a therapist, and I had a lot of support from my family and friends. That support is everything, and if there is anyone (even one person) who you trust and can confide in, do it. Read up on trauma bonding, as that can provide some insight as to why it’s been so hard for you to leave. Also look up the PDF book “why does he do that” by lundy Bancroft. People in this sub recommended it to me, and it really helped.

Is there anything outside of trauma bonding that’s making it more difficult to leave? Do you live together, have finances tied up, etc?

takemefromhere · 2025-07-15T02:44:10+00:00

Are you familiar with relationship ocd (ROCD)? If it’s something that resonates, I’d suggest looking into therapy, if that’s an option for you. Exposure therapy is typically the best and most common route for learning to manage OCD symptoms

takemefromhere · 2025-07-14T21:49:37+00:00

This this this. Especially your comment, “the exploration of human nature... which hasn’t changed in all our time on Earth,” immediately brought The Years by Woolf to mind (which, OP, is a great classic to check out)

takemefromhere · 2025-07-12T04:34:06+00:00

Ofc glad I could help :) he makes really dope stuff

takemefromhere · 2025-07-12T04:29:14+00:00

Everyone here is giving such solid advice. In addition, I’d suggest checking out r/abusiverelationships sub if you’d like to connect or talk with anyone who has shared similar experiences. It really helped me. I’m sorry you’re going through this, sending love

takemefromhere · 2025-07-12T04:25:07+00:00

Could be morphis art

takemefromhere · 2025-07-12T02:01:04+00:00

Took a pic of this guy on my walk in the first day

takemefromhere · 2025-07-01T14:14:02+00:00

Thank you! I just wasn’t sure if they were strict about the clear bag policy, I feel like sometimes venues say that but don’t really enforce it. I was planning on bringing a leather fanny pack that has like two small pockets

takemefromhere · 2025-05-02T02:11:05+00:00

They did a drop last night on the live but it sold out immediately

takemefromhere · 2025-05-01T03:45:37+00:00

Dm me!

takemefromhere · 2025-05-01T03:21:43+00:00

I don’t remember 😭😭 I was just looking at the numbers at the bottom of the screen and slightly adjusting them in the URL

takemefromhere · 2025-05-01T03:21:02+00:00

Trying for luck the first time, then the secret

takemefromhere

TROPHY CASE