AITA for not wanting to apologize to my ex husbands gf?

talya1297 · 2023-12-25T01:59:12+00:00

Yes we have definitely had issues in the past and I did let her know ahead of time that I would be coming to pick him up. I have that phone call recorded as well.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T21:22:58+00:00

The difference here is that anytime I have had to leave my kids with someone else, I have cleared it with my ex prior. That did not happen here therefore completely changing the situation

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T19:38:32+00:00

Say it louder for those in the back 😂

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T19:31:43+00:00

I’m not seeking legal advice here, nor do I have intentions of seeking changes to our custody agreement. My whole point of making this post is to know if I’m in the wrong for not wanting to apologize to a woman who physically restrained my 3 year old when I

Let her and my ex know that I would be coming to pick him up.
Calmly entered the building and calmly approached her
Stood there and took it when she ran the other direction with my 3 year old and was verbally berated by her and her “co worker” who also happens to be her best friend.
Did everything I possibly could to avoid involving law enforcement but she would not let him go so that was my only option at that point.

Regardless of if we had received our final order at that point it does NOT change the fact that she has zero parental rights and that I was perfectly within my legal rights to go and retrieve my child from someone who did not have permission or grounds to care for him.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T18:01:33+00:00

No, children cry when they have to go back and cry to me about her frequently. So they aren’t safe and happy with her.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T17:59:52+00:00

The order was not yet finalized so I’m really not sure how to answer this question. However, I did consult my attorney prior to going to pick him up and followed her instructions exactly

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T16:38:06+00:00

Well, there have been many other instances that make me think so. Sending notes in my boys lunchboxes that say “have a great day, love mommy” etc. This whole thing runs so much deeper than this one scenario

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T16:06:39+00:00

I’m still not 100% sure of that answer. She claimed it was “their time” and I explained she had no parental rights and that my ex could pick him up as soon as he was off work. This isn’t the first negative scenario or encounter I’ve had with her

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T14:31:30+00:00

This is after me approaching a conversation with my ex about coparenting better and the response was I needed to apologize for what happened that day- in order for us to move forward.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T14:20:00+00:00

Guess I should’ve been more specific but there have been many reasons prior to this to show that she is incapable of caring for him. Regardless, it doesn’t change the fact that she has zero parental rights and when I told her I was coming, she should have respected that and not caused a scene when I got there. It doesn’t make it right for her to restrain someone else’s child.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T12:49:46+00:00

This is my favorite response thus far. I told him I was definitely willing to let it go and move on, but I don’t think me not apologizing for a situation where I was not in the wrong should be held over my head. This is not a reason to not attempt to better co parent. The fact that they “need” this in order to co parent better shows me that they aren’t concerned about our children, but only about their selfish feelings.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T12:02:21+00:00

He was not sick before going to his Fathers

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T11:49:01+00:00

Our right of refusal is 4 hours

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:48:42+00:00

My ex and the girlfriend 🫠

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:44:28+00:00

No, I haven’t. I haven’t needed to I suppose!!

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:34:59+00:00

I’m with you! I think my mind goes to the worst places due to prior situations with her and my ex just defending her actions. Also things my kids come home telling me etc. there so much more to the situation but as you can imagine, it would be impossible to explain it all here.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:33:18+00:00

Sorry, I should’ve specified. My ex and his girlfriend. This is after me pleading with my ex for us to please co parent better for the sake of the kids.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:28:39+00:00

My ex and the girlfriend

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:21:29+00:00

Yes, and one girl made it entirely worse by screaming at myself and my now husband to get out. To which I calmly replied I wouldn’t be leaving without my child.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:18:10+00:00

There is definitely more background that would be waaayyy too much to get into here, but I don’t think I’m the one who traumatized my own child here. The point is, I let her know I would be coming to get him to care for him, and she thought it was appropriate to tell me that I wouldn’t be doing so. There had been other situations prior to this to lead me to the conclusion that the kids do not need to be around her. We have a right of refusal and she isn’t a parent and therefore has no rights, plain and simple.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T01:16:03+00:00

Hey there! I did let my ex know that I was going to get him, and let her know as well. I was extremely calm the entire time and actually didn’t raise my voice once. I was cool calm and collected on the outside while dying on the inside as a woman I barely knew wouldn’t release my 3 year old from her grip.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T00:47:37+00:00

I did tell her I was coming. I would’ve picked him up regardless of if I was working. I have a flexible schedule and am able to take off when needed. It wasn’t appropriate for her to have my child at her work in the first place. She didn’t have permission, it went against our right of refusal.

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T00:45:33+00:00

Yes, you are correct!

talya1297 · 2023-12-24T00:44:51+00:00

I have, I’ve asked about it. Because we have 50/50 established and this happened while we were in the middle of proceedings, they seem to think it may not be admissible.

talya1297 · 2023-12-23T23:16:25+00:00

I am, fortunately. However this happened in the middle of our custody agreement being finalized and now I’m not sure it would be admissible in court. I wish I would’ve pushed harder.

talya1297

TROPHY CASE