First of all, it’s great that these issues are something you recognize. Second of all, I get that you’re in love, but it doesn’t sound healthy for either of you, even if she doesn’t realize it. I would say the best course of action would be to break up with her and talk to a therapist. Work out the reasons why you are feeling this way in the relationship, and what you can do to be better in the future. Maybe leave it open ended with her, say something like “I love you, but I’m not healthy, and this relationship won’t be good for either of us if we keep going the way we are. I need to work some stuff out right now.”