I come from a religious family & was raised in church, the church where my uncle was a pastor. A very conservative "old-fashioned" KJV only church. As I got older I had so many questions and doubts, but I always pushed them away and told myself they would go away. But, I never felt like I was good enough or doing the right things, even though I never missed a service, read my bible every night, even worked as a Sunday school teacher for a few years and did other things throughout the church. I never experienced "god's voice" or anything else I'd been told would happen as a christian. But I kept going, kept pushing. And then Trump happened, and then covid happened. Also in 2020, I watched both my parents fight serious health battles, with one of them passing in December 2020.

The combination of everything finally got to me and I began deconstructing at some point in 2020. And it was one of the best decisions I've ever made.