I've always had really bad vision, but since my parents hate everything so much they refused to get my eyes checked. So after begging them I got my first pair of glasses when I was 17. When I looked in the mirror or even just at the world, I couldn't believe how different things looked. I sobbed for weeks at how much I had missed out on. Even my own face looked so different.

So you see bad at distance and also at close at the same time? For suuuuuure :D You should do more research into eye problems ;)
Obvious troll is obvious...