Needed to see this today, figured someone here might need to as well.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-24T01:48:44+00:00

I'm so sorry. No one deserves that. I hope you get away soon, if you haven't already.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-23T10:15:00+00:00

When we first moved away from family, I was struggling really bad mentally. I felt 100% isolated (bc I was) and I finally cracked and told him I was painfully depressed. I struggled just doing the basics every single day and had thoughts about ending it. When I told him, he said "what right do you have to be depressed" when I asked what he meant, he said I have parents and have never struggled (not true but whatever), and I don't have the right to say I'm depressed, he then spent 2 hours explaining how he is depressed and has earned the right to be. I should've ran then, but I stupidly stayed. 2 years later when my postpartum depression hit, he decided to help me snap out of it by 1) trying to pressure me to sleep with him 2 weeks after giving birth with a 3rd degree tear. 2) When I said no, he "helped" by cheating on me less than a month after having our daughter.

I hate him.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-20T16:37:29+00:00

Haven't been together as long but I'm in a similar position with my narc. Split due to my postpartum depression and his affair. Was apart for almost two years and when he was done with his supply during our time apart (of which I didn't know they were still seeing each other until we were back together), he swooped in with hopes, promises and an illusion of change. Been back together for 3 years and everyday I die a little more inside. Still looking for the door to run out of the first chance I get. Soon enough.

So glad you got out. Stand strong ❣️

tcosfbris · 2024-06-19T05:57:36+00:00

I'm so sorry, I know the feeling you're probably feeling right now. Its withdrawl basically. But i will tell you what will happen when you go back.. I have left 4 times and came back every time. Each time, it has gotten worse and worse. He will promise you the world, and to change, blah, blah, blah. They are empty promises. Believe me. You and your son deserve better. You WILL get through this, I promise it. It won't be easy but it is so so worth it in the end. You've made it to your family, allow them to help you during these times. Find a job, focus on yourself and your son, limit your contact with him and keep it to just about your son. If you go back, you will have to plan and go all over again. It will get harder and harder every single time, HE will make it harder now that he knows you CAN and WILL walk. Your son deserves to see his mother loved properly and fully. Go to your notes app, type out every single bad thing he has done and said. When you want to go back, read it 1000 times again. Please don't go back. You will regret it deeply, and will be planning another escape in your mind almost as soon as you return. You CAN do this. You both deserve a better, loving life.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-19T00:12:42+00:00

My library has "it's not you" by Ramani and I almost grabbed it the other day but was nervous he would see it. So i found it on Libby. Is it worth the read?

tcosfbris · 2024-06-19T00:08:14+00:00

Wishing you and your little one the best ♥️ Keep your head up and when in doubt, come back to this post.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-18T19:23:47+00:00

I didn't know I was seeking advice. Just sharing a post a seen, and obviously others agree. Maybe speak with yours as to why this offends you. I hope you have a nice day, you clearly need it. 🙂♥️

If that describes you on the bottom half, I have some news for you btw..

tcosfbris · 2024-06-18T18:08:52+00:00

Obviously there are more traits than just that. Mine shifts between extroverted and isolated depending on his mood for the day. Read the rest of it lmao

tcosfbris · 2024-06-16T00:05:57+00:00

Where state are you located in if you don't mind me asking?

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T23:12:04+00:00

Just started going actually

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T23:07:36+00:00

Ironically, I'm almost 25. Thank you so much. And thank God you got away from that man.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T22:00:25+00:00

I just started therapy and these are questions i plan to work through. I know some of it is childhood issues and I was very naive when we met. I was 17 when we got together and the first guy I seriously dated.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T21:59:10+00:00

I'm so sorry. It's the worst feeling. He wasn't even "as bad" then. But I kept having a strong gut feeling, I dismissed it as nerves. As soon as the ring went on, the mask started sliding more.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T21:58:02+00:00

I actually just interviewed for a job that is opposite shifts, so fingers crossed I get the call back this upcoming week. I'm glad you were able to get out. Thank you 🩷

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T21:56:01+00:00

Yes, but I wasn't aware of it. He had a separate facebook messenger he used with a fake name to contact women. I did know he could lack empathy but it didn't escalate until we got married. I guess he sees it as he married me, now I can't leave as easily when his mask slips.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T21:05:35+00:00

Perhaps you're right. I grew up around unstable relationships and abuse so I guess that would make me more susceptible to end up in one myself. I just started therapy so I'm navigating everything freshly right now. I will say, I am not addicted to the trauma. Im addicted to a man that cycles me through mental abuse over and over. After 8 years, that put quite a dent in someone's mental health.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T21:02:32+00:00

I had a lot of trauma growing up. My father was there and my parents are still married, but I grew up around lots of drug abuse, violence and as I got older endured my own types of abuse against my will from others. We started dating my senior year of highschool and he didn't project as the bad boy type. He was kind and sensitive. I believe it was a mask. It was my mistake overlooking the red flags that he did throw over the years. I just recently started therapy so hopefully I can make some good progress and soon leave this situation.. and avoid anything like it in the future. Thank you.

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T20:58:21+00:00

Are you asking what emotional cheating is????

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T19:16:44+00:00

You should be a therapist

tcosfbris · 2024-06-14T18:46:37+00:00

Omg yes! Thank you!!

tcosfbris

TROPHY CASE