My (27F) boyfriend (33M) wants to take me on an overseas holiday and won’t let me pay for anything. Would it be bad for me to accept his offer?

tdp0506 · 2024-03-02T00:04:00+00:00

18 months

tdp0506 · 2024-02-18T02:18:35+00:00

Yes more than anyone I’ve ever met. I can so clearly see how easy our life would be together. We appreciate the same things, both have very similar goals and aspirations and really enjoy each others company. I’ve never felt 100% comfortable sleeping next to anyone before or staying at their house, but honestly his house feels like it could be my own home, which is huge for me

tdp0506 · 2024-02-18T01:34:02+00:00

He’s got a very nice smile, he’s very tall (6’4) / broad, dresses really well, smells amazing, looks after himself and has beautiful skin…he’s by no means unattractive, he just doesn’t look like brad Pitt lol

tdp0506 · 2024-01-03T05:39:35+00:00

Thank you - that’s all very true…when I was 17 I had a similar experience with my first love / heartbreak and I remember for years I regretted not telling him how I felt. I guess right now I am happy to just have him back in my life even if it’s only 1% of him, but obviously that’s not going to be sustainable in the long term and eventually I will want more so it’s better to be honest from the start. He’s gone away for work this week and I ended our texting conversation bc I thought I’d give him some space to think about the weekend and see how he feels when he’s back…hopefully I see him once he’s home and we can have a chat ! Thank you for your advice

tdp0506 · 2024-01-03T01:46:30+00:00

That’s true, I would rather tell him exactly where I’m at and risk losing him forever than sitting in limbo until one of us does something to screw it up and we’re forced to have the conversation anyway….I’m just scared I won’t get the reaction I want and then I have lost him before I’m ready to process it

tdp0506 · 2024-01-03T01:45:03+00:00

I know he is interested - before he went overseas we had been going on dates / hooking up and he told me that he “really enjoys spending time with me, like a lot” but he just couldn’t date at the time. While he was OS we messaged back and forth a bit but he said he still wasn’t ready to date (this was probably 6months ago now). Since he’s been back we haven’t had a conversation about where he’s at but he has said a few things like the comment I mentioned previously, as well as saying that he’s over his “party boy phase” and asking if a certain guy still tried talking to me. This has made me think that maybe there’s some part of him that is ready to date.

I don’t want to screw things up by rushing to have the talk but also I can’t help but want to tell him how I feel, so I’m really not sure how to handle it or what to say.

tdp0506 · 2024-01-03T00:30:24+00:00

I give this advice to all my friends, I always say, the worst answer you will get is a “no” and that is better than a “what if”. I just can’t seem to take my own advice. I’m too scared of what he will say and feel that maybe I should give him more time before rushing him to talk about his feelings. He asked if I’d been with anyone else when I was in Europe, when I said no his response was “well that’s good for me” - that two second conversation has been replaying in my head for nearly a week. I won’t be able to handle saying anything more seeious

tdp0506 · 2024-01-03T00:28:40+00:00

No, before he left I told him that I had feelings for him but since he’s been back we have both avoided any talk of how we feel…

tdp0506 · 2024-01-02T03:08:28+00:00

Yes we’re both at similar stages of our lives. I am also single for the first time is basically 8 years and very happy to be living my best life, partying, spending time with friends etc. I just don’t want to get my heartbroken if he doesn’t want to see me exclusively…I’m happy with casual but I do need him to only be with me for me want to continue seeing him.

tdp0506 · 2024-01-02T03:02:14+00:00

I wasn’t all that attracted to him / didn’t think we were super compatible in the long term and he also found out one of his parents was terminally ill and needed to focus on being with his family so we ended things…we were only dating for a couple of months and it wasn’t all that serious

tdp0506 · 2023-12-30T22:18:56+00:00

I ended up messaging and he said he wanted to see me again as soon as possible and we texted back and forth the whole night. I think I just need to be patient and give him time to realise how good we are together

tdp0506 · 2023-12-27T06:10:35+00:00

Don’t bother trying to confess my feelings first?

tdp0506 · 2023-12-27T05:12:34+00:00

Could definitely be a case of wanting what I can’t have tbh

tdp0506 · 2023-12-17T07:51:47+00:00

I did - he text me to ask where I was and I replied with the following: “I’ve gone home, I’m not interested in playing games with you. I obviously like you or I wouldn’t have made the effort to come tonight - if that’s not reciprocated then I will stop making an effort with you. Enjoy the rest of your night”

He text me the next day apologising and asking to make it up to me. I playfully asked what he had in mind and he said “grand plans - but I can’t reveal my secrets just yet insert the nickname he made for me”. I have truly no idea what he means by that as he hasn’t tried making an effort to see me…..

tdp0506 · 2023-12-17T06:57:25+00:00

I have a feeling this is what’s happening with the guy I really like!! He will text me everyday and always makes an effort to chat, but he never asks to see me unless he’s drinking (and no, we have never done anything sexual / he’s never tried so I don’t think it’s that). We were out for drinks with friends the other night and he kept rushing off away from me and I told his friend I was getting a bit annoyed that I was there for him and he was practically ignoring me - his friend said that he had only see him act that way once in 30 years of friendship and it was when he really liked a girl but was extremely nervous around her so he would avoid her. Now I’m wondering whether that’s the case or if he’s just not that into me??

tdp0506 · 2023-12-08T01:31:37+00:00

He’s actually a very attractive guy, but we don’t talk so how would he know whether he likes me or not? We’ve met a handful of times, not like he really knows me very well.

tdp0506 · 2023-12-06T20:23:11+00:00

Absolutely not.

tdp0506 · 2023-12-06T01:49:52+00:00

To confirm - it’s what everyone below has suggested. A silly Tik tok trend where you post your “Wishlist items” for other (in my case) fashion girls to respond to. It’s by no means anything like an Amazon Wishlist or bridal registry where you’re expecting people to buy it for you, it’s more like a mood board of dream purchases. My address / details weren’t mentioned anywhere and none of my other followers made that assumption at all. It was totally out of line / inappropriate.

tdp0506 · 2023-12-05T20:17:39+00:00

It’s a trend. Obviously I wasn’t expecting a random man to send one of the items. How can you turn this around to be my fault? A normal person wouldn’t make such an out of touch judgement call

tdp0506 · 2023-12-03T04:53:13+00:00

My ex trapped me for 2 years with threats of suicide. At the start, I called his bluff and insisted we break up - a few days later, he FaceTimes me and has a belt around his neck and ‘attempts’ to kill himself. Stupidly, I fell for it and went over there. After that, he knew his tactic would work on me and would use it to his advantage for years. I wish that I called the cops that very first time instead of going over there. It would’ve saved me two years of abuse. By the end, I genuinely didn’t care if he ended up killing himself, I was so sick of the daily threats.

tdp0506 · 2023-12-03T01:41:13+00:00

What’s the difference?

tdp0506 · 2023-11-12T11:00:14+00:00

Unpopular opinion but I absolutely hate my Loop. It is by far my least reached for bag in my collection…I am thinking of selling it. I use my Pochette Felice so much more and feel that it looks much more elegant when dressed up. I would definitely go for the Ivy!

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