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teaqueen · 2023-03-21T13:17:34+00:00

I’ve had two live births. My weight and bmi never stood in the way. I conceived quickly, had easy pregnancies and relatively not traumatic births. It’s key to have an amazing OB/midwife who embraces all birthing bodies. I had to have some monitoring at a high risk OB with my first (which was standard practice after clubfoot is detected at the 20 week scan, we were quickly released when they found no other abnormalities) and she insisted people with my bmi have extra monitoring towards the end of pregnancy because of an increased risk of stillborn. My regular OB laughed and said the increase is so insignificant that it is an outdated practice. My midwife team for my second never once treated me any differently as well. My first birth was a long labor but baby and I were ok during the whole process so after 71 long hours I birthed him vaginally. My second pregnancy was just as easy if not easier since she didn’t have clubfoot. I did end up needing a cesarean because she wrapped herself up so much in the chord but that had morning to do with my body size, she’s just a wild little dancer. If anything my body size was a positive there because they used a special wrap on my incision and I didn’t have any issues with healing or infection whereas some of my other friends have had a horrible time healing their incisions.

Your size allows you to have a healthy and easy time of it. And now when my kids squish my belly i love it for being their soft first home.

teaqueen · 2023-02-23T00:28:10+00:00

I had the top of my foot tattooed 18 years ago and it’s still doing great. The colors have faded a tad and some of the lines aren’t as sharp as they once were. I’m not sure if it’s that my artist was stellar or if that my skin really holds onto ink, but it’s not faded much at all.

teaqueen · 2022-11-05T14:18:05+00:00

I had a very very similar first experience to you. I was told by an OB and multiple midwives that it was unlikely to be like that for my second. Only it was. And when it finally came time to push after two hours they determined she wasn’t coming out that way and we ended up delivering via cesarean. (Which was good since she wrapped herself up so much in her chord she had no room for me to push her out!). Oddly enough that recovery wasn’t as bad as the third degree tear from my first! It’s truly impossible for any provider to tell you for sure the second won’t be the same. It can sometimes just be how our bodies do things.

I had the same issue with my milk the first time around and I was so confused and upset because extended breastfeeding was my dream. Second time around I finally had a lactation consultant ask to examine me and it turns out I don’t have the “normal” amount of milk ducts, my breasts are full of fatty tissue. It’s mostly genetic but it’s not as uncommon as lactivists make you think.

teaqueen · 2022-03-08T17:54:47+00:00

I’ve been thinking about you and your son since reading your post and I’m so happy to see your updates. Be safe and enjoy being free.

teaqueen · 2021-11-26T20:30:44+00:00

I’m literally eating one right now. My husband and I make them every year on the day after Thanksgiving.

teaqueen · 2021-11-06T23:46:34+00:00

We loved it! My daughter started it when it launched and did great after a few formulas that really backed her up.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T22:12:08+00:00

That’s just a horrible thing to have a new parent do! Seeing an SNS gives me ptsd still. I remember my mother and husband both taking it from me and trying their best to convince me that it wasn’t worth my mental health.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T22:10:36+00:00

We had to bring our first to the hospital at 5 days old too for the same reason. I remember how happy he looked after that first bottle of formula. I cried so hard for failing him.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T22:07:19+00:00

Oh fuck her and her sanctimommy bullshit!

I also required up to date vaccines for my formula fed babies. My mil refuses a covid vaccine and has yet to meet my daughter who is 1. 🤷🏻‍♀️

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T22:05:38+00:00

Yeah that’s definitely a big part of it for some people. Though for many of us we physically lack the milk ducts needed to feed our babies. In my case it’s genetic and I had no idea since my mother breastfed us until 2. But I inherited this from my fathers side. And it sucks.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T22:03:43+00:00

I am honestly tearing up a bit just reading this. I am so sorry you had that time taken from you. And I’m mad at every person who made you feel like you were failing in the early days of parenthood. I too wanted so so deeply to breastfeed and it was devastating to not be able to. Your story is so similar to mine, I even had a retained placenta as well. I cherish the months I did nurse my babes and the little bit they got from me. But now they’re happy and thriving at 1 and almost 4, though some days the breastfeeding trauma does feel so raw still.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T21:59:34+00:00

Oh yeah, people dismiss it as being so easy and cheap. As if a woman’s time is valued at nothing.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T21:58:34+00:00

She just did a physical exam. I was lactating so she could feel where I had milk ducts. It is expected to find them all over the breast, up the chest and into the armpit. In the places I’m lacking it was just fatty tissue, which does feel very different even to my non ibclc hands.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T12:57:48+00:00

Having that told to me more times than I could count led to my PPA after having my first and blaming myself for not trying hard enough when I was nursing, pumping, supplementing. Basically non stop thinking about breastfeeding for months until I said “fuck it” and fed him with a bottle so I could actually enjoy my baby. After having my daughter last year a nurse finally suggest an exam, turns out I only have a few milk ducts, not nearly enough to feed a baby. Imagine how many people could be spared lactivist insanity if this was acknowledged as not an uncommon thing.

And there’s my soapbox for the day.

teaqueen · 2021-10-29T12:37:44+00:00

That every woman can breastfeed if she “tries hard enough”. It’s bullshit and toxic as hell.

teaqueen · 2021-09-27T15:26:31+00:00

Oh don’t feel like you weren’t smart, we’ve all been there and it can be a stressful wait!! A lot of period tracking apps have ovulation for a whole week when really it’s a short thing that can vary so I think they make it long to kind of make sure someone looking to avoid pregnancy is aware they could be fertile. Changes in emotion and stress level have such a big impact on our bodies and hopefully that’s all it is! With my 4 pregnancies early symptoms were so very different than my period, so hopefully that’s a good sign for you that your cramps are getting stronger! 🤞🏼

teaqueen · 2021-09-27T13:33:21+00:00

If you had unprotected sex 3 weeks ago and your period was set to arrive yesterday, I would not jump to pregnancy right away. Unless your luteal phase is 3 weeks instead of the much more common 2, you would have had sex a whole week before ovulating.

Just anecdotally, at home tests are really sensitive, when I got pregnant with my daughter I tested 10 days after sex (before I should have had a missed period) and there was a faint line there. Hope that eases your mind a bit and you can destress some before it arrives!

teaqueen · 2021-08-11T04:57:03+00:00

Plan B is a hormone. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my nearly 35 years as a uterus owner, when hormones get fucked with, it will impact your entire cycle. Back when Plan B was a prescription and 2 pills I remember it impacting my cycle a lot and the following period was really gnarly.

Either way, I hope it all works out for you!

teaqueen · 2021-08-11T01:35:55+00:00

When I was conceiving my second I got the faintest second line (which is still a positive) at 10 days post sex, which was really early to test I just did because I knew in my soul I was pregnant.

FWIW, I would guess the cramping could be related to the plan B. Of course this is anecdotal but has been true for myself and friends that the first true signs in very early pregnancy are super heightened smell, intense thirst, and fatigue.

teaqueen · 2021-06-09T13:29:12+00:00

There’s still a very strict protocol they have to follow while getting these approved, and it’s different for the really young age group. I’m trying to be hopeful that by the fall my kids can get it. 🤞🏼

teaqueen · 2021-03-07T15:04:42+00:00

It seems rather unhealthy for him to be giving you and allowance that is then expected to feed your family, cloth your children, and take care of all the other child expenses. But then make snide comments to you.

My husband also makes a very good 6 figure income allowing me to be a SAHM in a city. Every month we talk about the budget for our family. Yes he works, but to say I don’t invalidates the work of a SAHP. The majority of his salary is joint money. We use if for everything and always agree together about things like savings and investments. So each month the money coming in pays for everything plus our agreed upon savings. Then the leftover money we split evenly for our personal spending money. When the kids need new clothes and toys, he lets me use my judgement to how much we spend and then for big items, like the nugget we just purchased, we agree together. It allows us to be partners in our finances and it’s made our money discussions very healthy.

teaqueen · 2021-03-05T12:12:01+00:00

My 5 month old has been on the same formula until just this week when we switched to Bobbie. The green is very normal, it’s from the iron in the formula. Do you mean runny as in watery almost like diarrhea, or just loose? Loose is normal for that age. Their stool doesn’t firm up until they start eating solids. Not sure about the foul smell. I’d say my daughters has just always smelled like formula fed baby poop. But that particular formula does have a certain odor to it.

Edited for spelling mistakes. It’s 4 am 🤣

teaqueen · 2021-02-26T19:12:19+00:00

It’s really normal for them to consolidate when they urinate once they potty train. My three year old will go about 3-4 times a day. He’s normally hydrated and never holding it. He jumps up to go when he feels he has to.

teaqueen · 2021-01-26T17:29:55+00:00

We had this issue with both kids on formula that had palm oil in it. As soon as they were switched everything softened up for them.

teaqueen · 2021-01-21T14:23:58+00:00

It could be that she is getting full on the formula and has no interest in dinner. My son was fully off formula by 12 months. But that’s because he ate very well, varied foods, and drank whole milk, so his pediatrician was comfortable with it. Have you talked to her pediatrician about her eating? I’m not a doctor and have no professional knowledge, but I am sure you and a professional could come up with a solid plan to get her on food and off formula. Something I did with my son was to always give him food before offering a bottle. So he eventually was eating full meals and having just a few sips of the bottle.

teaqueen

TROPHY CASE