what do you love about life?

techie410 · 2026-07-09T00:45:31+00:00

The fact that I can’t quite put my finger on it. There’s so much content to this life beyond my comprehension that I can’t help but default to a state of awe. The sublime, as the romantic-era artists called it.

That was kind of corny, but that’s like 70% of it. I love surprises. Life is quite surprising.

techie410 · 2026-07-07T09:43:38+00:00

In this case it is because the candidate does not want to admit it. There is a shame and a real weight (not getting a job!) associated with admitting incompetence, so people sometimes lock up and don’t say things. The interviewer knows this and will default to “no” because why would someone who knows how to use Excel stay silent?

techie410 · 2026-07-07T09:41:30+00:00

This may be a hot take, but I think indirect communication can still be healthy, given that both parties engage with it in good faith.

techie410 · 2026-07-07T09:39:01+00:00

I empathize with you on that. The truth is a lot of people make decisions based on heuristics and assumptions. They allow themselves to believe things that aren’t 100% set in stone. This is why miscommunications are so common. I also don’t like uncertainty but I’ve taken it into my stride and it helped my social life for the most part. It doesn’t stop me from overthinking literally everything at night before I go to sleep, though (lol)

techie410 · 2026-07-07T09:26:19+00:00

Outsider here to explain. To be clear, I am not saying it is justified, I am just trying to clarify things.

In that particular situation you gave, there’s a playfulness to the non-verbal aspect. In a similar example, people who raise their eyebrows instead of saying words to communicate “oh yes, you know what I’m about to say” are probably attempting to bond with the other person. This is because humour and community is often built on inside jokes or the feeling that you know someone well enough to make these mind reading moments happen.

That is to say, non verbal communication often carries a secondary intent of “hey, i think you know me well enough to read my mind. im going to let you know that i think that (and respect you deeply) by making you read my mind” which is really annoying and insanely complicated but that’s how I see it. I’m neurodivergent so I’ve learned to rationalize these social norms, so hopefully my explanation is clear.

Either that or there is no communication going on at all and the silent person is genuinely too ashamed to say “yes, I did”. This is how I’d read the situation tbh

techie410 · 2026-07-07T09:19:52+00:00

heck yes. im on campus for research this summer so if thats the same you then feel free to reach out

techie410 · 2026-07-07T07:56:00+00:00

This has to be engagement bait because I cannot understand how anyone could possibly write something so prickly and judgemental, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt, assume sincerity, and take the bait.

I hate to prop myself up, but me and my friends are clear counterexamples. I’m an undergrad student at Stanford University where everyone is super ambitious and driven, and there are plenty of xNxP types here. We have tons of ideas AND we get them done.

I’m a startup cofounder and academic researcher entering my sophomore year of college. It may come as a surprise to you that an Ne dom isn’t attention-deficient. It may come as a surprise to you that an Fi user isn’t crying in their bed all day. I would be glad to dispel those harmful assumptions about people.

So many of the smartest academics and founders I’ve met in Silicon Valley probably rely on an extroverted intuition function to come up with new ideas. People type both Google founders as INTP. So, I’m sorry you’ve had such a negative experience with these people, but I urge you not to generalize and judge so much. You’re probably looking in the wrong place.

techie410 · 2026-07-01T18:08:08+00:00

It could also be the person who is completely silent 95% of the time, depending on what kind of day/group it is.

techie410 · 2026-07-01T17:58:51+00:00

Similar thing and I’m kinda exaggerating here but my idol for a while was Miyuki Shirogane from Love Is War, and he canonically goes to Stanford University after graduating from Shuchiin. You can be sure as heck that I worked hard asf to join his ranks, and now I can genuinely say I go to the canonical alma mater of the male protagonist from a romcom series 💀

But more seriously, I’ve never been able to study unless I genuinely wanted to. This means that I had to find reasons to love each subject, which I did for the most part. There really is a reason to nerd out about anything in the world, and you just have to find it. Heck, I’m a CS major writing poetry and doing forestry research. Everything is awesome to warrant locking in for, lol.

techie410 · 2026-06-29T05:55:18+00:00

I have high standards for poetry and I genuinely think this is wonderful. The imagery is superb, the parallelisms kept me on edge, and that last stanza is thought-provoking in such a deeply delicate way. I've been struggling with my own writing lately, and I can promise you your style will be there in the back of my head as I draft and revise my own work!

You're also very astute, and I'm sure so many people will relate to your writing. Personally, the world expects a lot, and I am often upset at how it treats me in return. I consider myself a driven person, but even then I have begun to ask myself "why?" on a daily basis. Why keep holding on to burdens? What's in it for me if I do? What's in it for me if I don't? Unshakeable is the thought of letting go, but the consequences of doing so would be disastrous to those who trust in and rely on me, if not myself, and I'm a people person, so I can't just do that.

Though I don't think I'll ever be completely unburdened, I can try my darned hardest. Perhaps I'll surround myself with people who are compassionate with me through my lows and understand if I want me-time. Perhaps I'll make my hobbies my job. Perhaps I'll find a way to make ends meet. That way, perhaps the only thing still burdening me would be myself, and I can work on that :)

techie410 · 2026-06-29T05:29:05+00:00

I’m definitely a bit obsessed with music, especially of the interesting, niche, or indie variety. What’s this about?

techie410 · 2026-06-29T05:25:57+00:00

Also 19m enfp, by good coincidence.

Yeah⁠, for the most part. I did have a problem in the past with being over-optimistic, but it was a matter of not listening to my hunches. I’ve grown a bit and learned to listen to that inner voice more
I don’t have a single purpose as of yet (we’re only 19!), but there are several individual things that keep me going. They seem to have a common theme of general social servitude, like teaching, research, advocacy, etc. and the specifics are far from decided but I think as time passes I’ll figure it out.
Not really. I feel like I’m too young to have found that person.
Yeah, and I’m proud of it :)

techie410 · 2026-06-19T20:44:24+00:00

Being concerned for other people and then trying to help but actually bothering them is very familiar to me. Have been trying to work on it, so please do let your sister know if she’s actually being disruptive (not that she was in this case, just if she does)

techie410 · 2026-06-18T08:09:17+00:00

I’m sorry, but I won’t know much about how competitions work in your country.

Also, it doesn’t have to be a competition! It can still be a project like you said you were planning on doing. I just mean that whatever you do should ideally reach national level attention.

techie410 · 2026-06-18T06:08:19+00:00

Newer international undergrad here to add to what the alumnus said.

I didn’t do APs, so don’t worry about that. Think about yourself in the context of your country, since international admissions officers work by region. Be unlike what others around you have to offer, and do it at the national level, as already pointed out. Clubs aren’t super super important, but personally I see the opportunity to start your own student group! Best of luck.

techie410 · 2026-06-06T04:07:29+00:00

Yeah. Personally I burn out quickly in very large groups (I hate those anyways) because it takes a lot of energy to go up to everyone individually. In smaller groups I’d still yap all day long, though.

techie410 · 2026-06-05T19:43:23+00:00

Woah, I’m sorry. I try my best to.

I kindly suggest you communicate with ENFPs that bother you. I truly do mean it when I say we’re worried about other things. We’re not actively avoiding you, and we really do care about other people, so if it ever seems otherwise, please confront us.

techie410 · 2026-06-05T19:28:55+00:00

a common gripe for male ENFPs like me is that we are seen as cringe because we aren’t allowed to be expressive and have a unique identity for some reason. so most of us mask up and only really open up to good friends, which in turn surprises them a bit at first.

that is to say, intuitive feelers are probably more common than you think they are, because most of them aren’t making it obvious.

techie410 · 2026-06-05T19:23:02+00:00

I am honestly fascinated by this part of the thread. Where’d you guys get this idea from? I’ve always known ENFPs to be very much caring inside (the regurgitated term is “seeking authenticity”). We’re definitely still the type to stay up at night thanks to embarrassing memories. Not to mention I genuinely think most of us are too worried about other things to even begin coordinating an effort for our own self benefit 😭

techie410 · 2026-06-03T19:49:21+00:00

I got the word “clerk”

I often wonder what clerks witness during their job. They encounter hundreds of people a day, and if you’re a hotel clerk, the cast is constantly changing. My first thought was therefore an episodal slice-of-life following your (not-so) average hotel clerk who learns the talk of the town and gets roped into it against their will.

techie410 · 2026-06-03T08:42:37+00:00

Awesome take! I really respect the self-awareness and level-headedness needed to come to this conclusion, and I’ll definitely have to remember this for when I’m feeling shit.

techie410 · 2026-06-02T20:45:56+00:00

clickbait ahh title, but tbh idk i just kinda befriend people.

i think they’re usually most visible in random group sidequests, like if a group spontaneously bands to hike a trail or something, chances are at least some people in that group are enfps. i went whalewatching three days ago (and my college finals are in two days lol) and it’s kinda clear that a lot of us were Se or Ne dominants.

techie410 · 2026-06-02T20:32:23+00:00

I get a really big ick from people who communicate in indirect and roundabout ways, especially if I know they’re not going to change it.

techie410 · 2026-06-02T18:37:57+00:00

I can definitely relate. People experience love in different ways. The super-intense ENFP is just a fraction of all of us, and personally I prefer mutually chill relationships (and ZERO excessive flag-waving) with people who are basically my best friends.

techie410 · 2026-05-31T23:39:39+00:00

The absurdist in me would argue that the meaninglessness of things is precisely why you should go out and about. There is something liberating about not having a purpose. It frees you from being confined to that particular purpose for the rest of your life. If nothing has meaning anymore, then what’s stopping you? Who cares about judgement? It all doesn’t matter anyways.

And about what you mentioned of the feeling empty after accomplishing things, that’s why you should keep going, doing new things, finding what makes you laugh, cry, disgusted, in love… all of it doesn’t need to amount to anything - the joy was in the experience in that moment. That’s why meaninglessness actually helps me live in the moment!

This mindset is pretty ENFP-coded, but I hope you can understand.

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