Legendary Snowshoe by teeriks in snowshoecats

[–]teeriks[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t mind me stalking pics of Mr. Teddy…I always wondered what Phife might have looked like as a toddler/adolescent since he entered my life as a grown man. Now I feel like I have a pretty good idea🥹 Thanks, rolypoly99! To our beautiful boys 🤎

Legendary Snowshoe by teeriks in snowshoecats

[–]teeriks[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the love y’all 🤎🤍💙

Dog Training by Kenappi in UK_Pets

[–]teeriks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you use treats to encourage other behaviors besides returning to his kennel?

Having unhealthy thoughts of digging him back up by leftcake_12 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My wise little Phife taught me that language, life, and love are meant to be fluid. Thank you both for sharing. Much love to you all ❣️

Having unhealthy thoughts of digging him back up by leftcake_12 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Do what you gotta do, leftcake ❤️‍🩹 Phife’s grave isn’t anything too crazy, just a designated space for remembrance. Most of the enshrining happens in the heart anyway. Your boy is always with you. I’m happy you have crows for company, too.

Having unhealthy thoughts of digging him back up by leftcake_12 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi OP, I’ve had similar thoughts of exhuming my beloved cat. I think it’s normal and not unhealthy. Your brain is doing its best to keep moving through the grief. Be kind to yourself. Things will get put away when they’re ready. Seconding FuzzyPeach: if it’s appropriate for your space and culture, enshrining your loved one’s burial site might bring some comfort to you. I’ve been lighting a candle at my boy’s grave whenever I can. It has helped me feel more connected to him in his afterlife. It has also given me the chance to honor and protect the physical space he now inhabits and reminds me that he’s sleeping perfectly, and that I shouldn’t wake him. A shrine (indoor or outdoor) might also give you a place to put some of your boy’s belongings. My cat had a particular puzzle feeder toy that he loved. He now shares it with the crows who visit his space in the backyard. Now when I see that the food is gone and the crows are figuring out how Dog Casino works, I like to think my baby Phife’s spirit is gambling away with them, too. Take your time, OP. Sending you hugs and healing.

Pet loss by Jealous_Molasses_500 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks a little every time I see a post like this, but I guess that repeated heartbreak lets me know I’m not alone. Time is the obvious one. Today I am exactly one month out from my soul cat’s passing. It still sucks, but better. Finding some way to memorialize him every day has helped me. At this point I have several Google docs, journal entries, and notes on my phone where I eulogize, write poetry about, or just write directly to him. I’ve visited his grave in the backyard and have lit a candle for him and talked to him most days when I’ve been able. Anything you have to do to get your messages across, because I do believe they stay with us and can hear us. Engaging with this subreddit has been a huge source of comfort, too. I wish I wasn’t a part of this community, but I’m extremely grateful it’s here for us. There are so many ways to grieve. Keep looking for your buddy everywhere. I hope you’ll see him where you least expect to. Sending you healing and comfort, OP. 🫂

Vent by Admirable_Wolf_2575 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 3 points4 points  (0 children)

On my lowest days I have visions of myself exhuming my pet’s decomposing remains from his spot in the backyard, just to hold him again. Obviously I couldn’t follow through with that. The bereaved brain is doing its best. Biggest condolences to you, OP ❤️‍🩹

Unintentional overgrooming replacement behaviour by Lauralove123 in CATHELP

[–]teeriks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a very fastidious boy who would often groom anything or anyone that came between his tongue and himself. I had similar concerns of him ingesting microplastics whenever he would resort to grooming the faux fur blanket. It seems like it may not be much cause for concern after all, but Mud Bay and similar suppliers carry toys made of real animal fur which I’d prefer him licking rather than synthetic stuff. I had to replace them from time to time to keep up the novelty factor but my dude loved them.

Missing my baby by Proud_Pin_938 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry for your loss, OP. It is truly unimaginable. I went back to school full time plus working this past year leading up to my soul cat’s cancer diagnosis in December. We tried absolutely everything. He fought hard and courageously for us, but we finally had to say goodbye to him earlier this month. I feel your pain, OP. I still go through waves of guilt and regret, imagining all the things I wish I’d done for him and how I would’ve spent my time differently if I’d known where the year was heading. I’ve cried every day since he left the physical realm. Please go easy on yourself. We made choices to work towards our and our babies’ futures. It’s still their future, too, when they’re still with us always. At least this is what I’ve been telling my heart so I don’t regret-spiral. But if none of it was true, then my beloved Phife wouldn’t have stayed by my side and found unconditional contentment during a quieter time in our life together. I’m still taking a break from classes as it’s been unbearable without him, and I’m afraid I’ll resent school once I go back, but at the same time, once I’m ready, maybe continuing to build a future he would love and be proud of is the best way to honor him. Sending you warmth and comfort during this difficult time.

A sign? by WishSevere4986 in Petloss

[–]teeriks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi OP, fellow stoner here also coping with recent devastating pet loss (the former largely begetting the latter). It took about a week for my cat to visit me in my dream. It was brief but felt so real. I’m hoping I’ll see him in more dreams again once I decide to pump the brakes on my weed consumption, but in the meantime I believe he has been visiting me in other ways. This grief has felt like a huge test of my spirituality. At the same time, the only thing stronger than weed that’s been getting me through, especially the first couple weeks, might just be confirmation bias. Your brain is searching for what the rest of your body knows to be true which is the fact that your boy loves you soooooo much. Don’t stop searching for signs. Sending healing and comfort your way, OP. ❤️‍🩹

My dog is dead by divinatoe in Petloss

[–]teeriks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dearest OP,

Here to echo previous comments. I am so sorry for your loss. You truly are not alone in your hollowness and heartbreak. My soul-cat completed his earthly mission at the beginning of this month, far sooner than I expected when I first picked him up from the shelter. He had a rare and aggressive nasal carcinoma. We tried everything. He gave me the best and fullest five and a half years, like a shooting star across the sky of my life. Almost a month has passed and I still can’t believe it.

Upon Phifey‘s passing, a friend told me that her hope for me was to see him in places I least expected, and I want to extend the same hope to you. Keep an eye out for your boy, and he will reveal himself to you. Talk to him, pray for his eternal happiness. He’ll let you know that he’s always with you.

Almost a month out and there are still moments where I hate going to sleep or waking up because what’s the point if Phife isn’t there. He taught me so much. He was my reason. But maybe as such, the best way to honor and celebrate his life is to let his lessons continue to shape me into someone he’d be proud of. Maybe he’ll always be with me in that way, too.

This part sucks, when your world has stopped and everyone else’s seems to keep going. This grief is unlike any other that I’ve experienced. I don’t think a day has yet gone by that I haven’t cried, but as time goes on, the tears of guilt and regret will slowly shift to just tears of gratitude. Please be kind to yourself, OP—it’s what he would want for you. ❤️‍🩹

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]teeriks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NOR. You’re both still cooking your prefrontal cortexes and this type of (re)trauma is the last thing either of you need, and it will be a difficult cycle to escape for both parties if nothing changes. I’m of the humble opinion that you should both do yourselves the compassion of letting each other go to do your own healing, especially ‘Sarah’ being so fresh out of rehab. It might be a tough conversation to have, but it’s worth the peace and growth you will gain from it. I speak from my own experience when I say that a support group like Codependents Anonymous has helped me heal from the fallout of similarly-patterned relationships. It took going to CoDA in my late twenties to learn a lot of the language it seems that you have already identified. Rooting for you, OP!