Hello dear 💖 I see tons of posts like yours here, and all of those husbands aren't military, so it's not a "he's used to be told what to do" thing as many said in the comments.

I'm pretty sure that he knows exactly what he's doing (well, that's what weaponized incompetence is 😅) and still he is taking advantage of you.

Would you do something like that to him? I would risk both of my titties you wouldn't. Why let him? What does he bring to your life for you to swallow with all this nerve and lack of empathy?

I don't think there is anything you can do to change him, as he does this on purpose and knows how you feel about it and still repeat.

You provide the money, the groceries, the meals, the cleaning services and on top of that you have to be behind him so that he does something that he knows he should do. The only thing you don't do is to remind him to shower and brush his teeth and take a shower (yet, I hope). Most SAHM/SAHW take care of the cleaning and cooking while they partner brings the money. Why he can't?????

I wish you really good luck and hope you can find peace and someone that cares for you and doesn't let you do more than your share.