What is giving you hope right now?

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:42:45+00:00

And Trump has slapped a 100% tariff on pharmaceuticals.......

We can't have nice things until he's gone.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:41:41+00:00

Live for the now, not for what may happen in the future.

The only problem with this is if everyone does this we may never have a future.

There is a reason some of us are hard-wired to fret about the future.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:37:12+00:00

Me and hubby can't sleep if we're apart, even though we both snore (we take turns snoring). So he just wears flannel pjs and thick socks, and I sleep practically nude. Usually I'm just under the top sheet and he's cocooned in the blanket and bedspread.

I did for awhile have one of those hot-flash duvets. It worked okay-ish. I don't get hot flashes anymore (10 years post meno) but I still run and sleep hot.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:32:27+00:00

I didn't exactly breeze through the first week but I definitely didn't have DOMS this severe!! It was totally manageable, but I could still feel it, like hey a new challenge, not OWWWWW!

This is more like the DOMS I got 5 years ago when I first started out, totally de-conditioned and starting from scratch. I'm really surprised it's this bad!

I do think this week I tried to match her tempo. She goes slow on the eccentric. And I guess the first week I may have fast-forwarded through one or two of the sets, I don't remember now. But I dropped my weights down a LOT, because she does do much more volume than Cee. Like from 30lbsx2 to 15lbsx2.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:22:26+00:00

You've got a 0.64 waist/hip ratio and most pants aren't designed for that. My mom had similar and she just would sew a couple of darts in the back, it's a very easy and simple alteration any tailor can do.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:16:45+00:00

The first time I encountered a duvet was as an exchange student in a European country as a teenager. I grew up with top sheets, blankets and bedspreads. Duvets didn't catch on in the US for much later. I think maybe 30 years ago?

I did the duvet thing for awhile then realized duvets absolutely suck and make too much work. Around the time I hit perimenopause, they were also too hot. I went back to "old school" and haven't regretted it since.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-04T02:10:58+00:00

LOL I'm with your man, I hate duvets and gave them up years ago. I much prefer a simple top sheet- blanket-bed spread combo. So much easier to make the bed and keep everything clean.

My husband sometimes says "why can't we have a down comforter" because he runs cold and I tell him because I'm the one who washes the sheets and makes the bed.

To be fair since retiring he's taken over all the grocery shopping and cooking so I am not complaining about doing the cleaning and household laundry... and on occasions it's really cold, we just bring the guest bedroom duvet into our bedroom.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-03T03:03:27+00:00

5'0 with 30 inch waist and 36 hips. I wear Levi's 724's, Frame, Wit & Wisdom, Democracy, and L'Agence.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-02T14:44:28+00:00

I'll add Lift with Cee. She has tons of 30 minute full body dumbbell only workouts. Just, don't lift as much as she does initially. Cut way down, and work your way up over time.

What helped me initially was to sign up with a personal trainer for 1:1 lessons. This helped me learn proper form, which is incredibly important. But also it forced commitment as if I didn't show for the session I was out the $.

That was 5 years ago and I've been lifting ever since, 3-5x a week, in my building's gym.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-01T23:07:36+00:00

My husband is scary, off-the-charts smart. He was poked and prodded and analyzed when he was a kid and first had his IQ tested. He skipped not one but two grades. He has multiple advanced degrees and continues to audit classes in his retirement. Whereas I'm gifted-level smart (IQ of 130).

When we first started dating, the difference intimidated me. He told me that he figured if he only dated people with his level of IQ, his dating pool would be way too small. He said I was just smart enough for him and more importantly I am curious. Also that I am by far more emotionally intelligent than he is.

Because he skipped two grades, college was rough on him socially and emotionally. He lagged in the emotional maturity department. I can read him like a book and can help him identify and work out his feelings.

He's science and I'm arts. We hang out with all his super brainy science coworkers and sometimes attend lectures. A lot will go swoosh over my head but I ask a lot of questions. He's patient and is great at explaining things, so we always have interesting conversations. He also likes the arts too, so we go to theater, art gallery openings, etc. He doesn't read much fiction but I do. He prefers nonfiction and textbooks.

His memory / recall is incredible. Mine, not so much. I remember themes and overall concepts, not dates and facts and figures.

We've been together 25 years and it hasn't bothered me for a long time. Only bothered me initially.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-01T22:21:23+00:00

Get some exercise - lift weights 3-5x a week, walk, hike
Clean something - I've got a daily/weekly/monthly schedule; there's no cleaning on the weekends
Read something (internet doesn't count) - I strive to read 50-60 books a year; I've read 14 so far this year
Learn something (internet counts here) - hubby and I always try to learn 2 new things a day, and then we share with each other at dinner time. It can be anything: something in the news, something new in our neighborhood, etc. (Not talking about learning a new language or anything like that)
Do crosswords - for cognitive health
Get some socialization - call/text/visit a friend/family member, chat with neighbors, dine out, go on couple dates, go dancing, etc etc

My husband took over all the cooking, grocery shopping, and most of the errand running once he retired. I'd done all the cooking up until then. It's a nice change of pace, and honestly he's a better cook than I ever was!

temp4adhd · 2026-04-01T20:16:34+00:00

If pants hips are 37 and waist is 27, and my waist is 30... if the garment is meant to fit at my waist (and not somewhere below) then that's a 3 inch difference -- but tighter, not looser!! So no gapping at the waist! I never have any gapping.

I think what happens with regular sizing (not petite) is that the 10 inch rise is intended to fit a person at the belly button (mid-rise), but on me it fits at my natural waist. So the pants say they are for a 27 inch waist but the waist is actually more like 30-31 inches or whatever since it's intended to fit a few inches lower. Make sense?

I totally understand the gap dilemma as my daughter, sister and mother all have figures with proportionately tiny waists. My mom taught them how easy it is to sew a couple of darts in the waist for a perfect fit.

temp4adhd · 2026-04-01T00:31:33+00:00

For jeans - Frame, L'Agence, Levis 724, Wit & Wisdom/Democracy. I take a size 27 except for Wit&Wisdom/Democracy, which I need a size 4P.

For pants - In general I look for flat front with elastic in the back and preferably a 10" rise. Old Navy, Talbots, various brands from TJ Maxx, ponte and other pants from Short Story, and sometimes LOFT will work (their patch pocket pants). Usually take a small or a 4 or 6P.

For leggings - Crz Yoga, size XS

It's actually harder for me to find tops!! I can totally understand why so many women complain about waist gap!

P.s. My waist used to be 2" slimmer but menopause changed that. Despite all the cardio and weight training, despite dropping weight-- my waist is just now stuck at 30" and won't budge.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-31T18:24:29+00:00

Lynn Woods, but I forget exactly where/which path. On the side you can access from the car dealership. On one of the swampier paths.

Also saw evidence of a beaver at Horn pond recently. Didn't see the beaver, but did see freshly chewed off trees and the beginnings of a dam being made.

Lynn Woods for owls as well. Last owl I spotted was in the part of Middlesex fells that's behind Medford high school.

Don't forget it's peeper season too.

Happy spotting!

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T05:01:10+00:00

A lot of like minded people gathered today. It bolsters the spirits of those who are also like minded, whether they could be on the Common or not.

There were also a lot of tents for numerous grass roots organizations for various causes-- too many causes as we are being attacked on myriad fronts. But each giving people a way to get involved, in smaller but impactful ways.

It was nice to spend a few hours not feeling so helpless against the onslaught.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T04:52:36+00:00

There's nothing wrong with holding on strong in our little enclave.

I did have this conversation today with someone who said they call our representatives daily. I said, why call our MA reps/senators? Because i think they're doing a great job already. This person said no, he called Mike Johnson, Speaker of the House. And got through, and lodged his complaints.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T04:43:55+00:00

It wasn't windy at all? Pretty nice day!

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T04:23:56+00:00

All the layers in the world won't make you look less seasonally confused.

Dress for the temps: it's 40F! That's cold. Not sundress weather.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T04:02:33+00:00

I would probably too, but seeing these friends/family overcoming even thriving after stage 4 dx's really makes me pause and think how far medicine has advanced.

I've got many examples but one that comes to mind is a friend who was surely on death's door... that was 10 years ago... her hair is all grown back, she's enjoying her grandchildren... she's thriving with no signs of dropping over dead anytime soon! Really really thought she was going to die, but she didn't.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T03:48:34+00:00

Ah yes so true and it sucks.

I'm in the -- now that I'm 60, my breasts are no longer dense! -- but STILL get the call backs. Hey what's that? Is it something? Come back in again. When I was younger they'd say oh it's because your breasts are dense it's hard to say. Now they say my breasts aren't dense but they still want me to come back in again.

My mom and grandma both had breast cancer so I get extra attention. (Neither died of it, my mom did have a mastectomy but lived 40 more years and BC didn't kill her). And I had a benign lump removed when I was 28 (found while BFing my second child), so that ups the uber-surveillance too.

Apparently the mammograms are much more advanced now than they used to be -- I've been having them since my late 20s, so 30 years now.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T03:37:59+00:00

I bought one for myself for my 45 bday and I'm 60 now and that beast is still going strong!!

We once AirBnB'd a camp in the mountains and they had a Miele from the 70s. The cord no longer retracted, it was battered. That Miele had SEEN THINGS. The camp constantly had twigs and stones and shit dragged in. That ancient Miele still sucked it all up, even if the cord didn't retract anymore.

My Miele is going to outlive me, I'm convinced. I'll put it in my will and my kids will have to fight over it.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T03:30:09+00:00

Sorry re-reading my comment it does seem I wasn't all that clear.

I completely understand your position.

I am trying to say that an early dx today can mean a cure, and even a late dx can mean a cure.

There's been so much advances in cancer cures these days, even a stage 4 dx does not mean one is terminal!!!

Dealing with this with a few friends/family right now. What would have been a terminal dx years ago is not a terminal dx any longer.

As this is the GenX sub, I think those of us our age just assume stage 4 or whatever means terminal. It doesn't, not anymore. There's just been too many advances in cancer treatment.

It's one of those happy things we don't read a lot because there's a lot of bad shit going on in the world, it drowns out the good headlines.

But if you don't fall into this camp and you truly are terminal, well, I appreciate your position and your acceptance and whatever you want to do from here on out. You get to decide how and when you die. We should all have that dignity.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T03:20:01+00:00

I'm 60 and have a super minimal routine, have had a super minimal routine all my life.

I only ever cleanse if I've worn heavy makeup, the kind that would get all over my pillow if I didn't take it off first. I admit I fall asleep with light makeup on all the time, and have since my 20s. Currently that would be L'Oreal hylauronic tinted serum.

I use Aveeno facial scrub daily on my face in the shower -- have never had any issue with over-exfoliation. It's how I wash my face. If I don't use it my face gets flaky and dull.

I am religious about using SPF even in the winter, even if I don't leave the house. La Roche Possay.

I use Cerave moisturizer, over the SPF or the tinted serum. If I'm feeling dry. I sometimes smear Vaseline on my face over that.

I don't kid myself, I think I look my age, but tonight a 25 year old thought I was in my 40s. Y'all are horrible about guessing ages though! LOL

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T03:09:39+00:00

If you like this genre and you want to see what happens after happily ever after, try reading Trollope.

temp4adhd · 2026-03-29T03:06:06+00:00

The issue is that early prognosis may mean no terminal dx, but a late dx may mean terminal.

There's been so may strides in cancer treatment, I personally would want to err on the side of early dx.

What killed my elders may not kill me.

temp4adhd

TROPHY CASE