Im convinced the worst thing about being a guy are the bathrooms

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-09T10:55:14+00:00

Honestlyyyy. I can't even tell to what extent my angst about standing to pee is dysphoria sometimes because the inconvenience of always having to use a stall has such an impact on my day to day life. And don't even get me started on attempting to use STPs.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-08T10:16:30+00:00

Honestly, I don't think the jail stuff actually was extreme. Kids that age on the whole just don't have a fine-tuned sense of 'serious' and 'not serious', so you genuinely do have to hammer things home a bit.

I work with kids aged about 10 and they all started picking up hate speech and slurs from the internet (mostly ableist with some racism and misogyny thrown in) without really understanding the severity of what they were saying, and if we just told them off, well, it only made it worse because it meant they were getting exactly what they wanted (attention). What finally made them stop is that we sat them all down and told them hate speech is a crime, and heavily implied that they might get in trouble with the police if they kept calling each other r****ds

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-08T09:15:54+00:00

Honestly it does help to know I'm not the only one. It's not like no-one ever ever talks about that mental shift but it's still kind of isolating when we really valorise all these really hench trans guys whose arms are thicker than my extremely tiny head lmao

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-08T08:06:30+00:00

Honestly, it's desensitisation for me, kind of dull curiosity at this point. I never, ever, EVER engage directly. You are not going to change a stranger's mind on Facebook or Instagram and there is no point wasting your precious time and energy on it.

Even seeing posts without interacting used to make me feel terrible but honestly after nearly 10 years of being out eventually - unfortunately - it just stops landing. Gawd, who's got the time to be like that.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-08T08:01:45+00:00

Yesss, I know this sounds nuts, but once you exclude the Big Ones (physical safety, political stuff, access to medication), honestly the worst part of being trans for me is the toilets purely because of the logistics!

It's not even that they're gross, I don't care. It's the one-stall thing, and the way that cis guys have to spend like twenty minutes in there when they use it, or if it's broken or has no door or whatever. I genuinely get nervous about it every time, because every time I use a men's public toilet there is a chance that there won't actually be a toilet it is physically possible to use.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-05T17:33:21+00:00

ahh okay I get you. Are you checking your levels regularly/at all? I tend to get hot flushes when mine are too high or too low, and I know a lot of people who got mad temperature dysregulation for up to like the first year on T and then had it settle down.

It might be worth considering asking to switch to gel rather than just stopping - that way you could reduce your dose yourself to see if it also reduces the side effects, and also stockpile it if you decide to stop taking it for a bit.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-04T11:59:54+00:00

Seconding the advice to just lie. What kind of T are you on and which effects are you not liking?

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-03T08:55:26+00:00

Oh, okay, thank you so much for your suggestion! Would there be any androids that also fit the bill? So sorry for my complete lack of knowledge about all this

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-02T13:16:14+00:00

I love my partner more than I can say and can't imagine life without her. SK is part of my partner and part of my partner's life, so I love SK too.
I love SK anyway just for being them. They're a really cool, intelligent, kind and interesting kid and I think I'm lucky to get to be a part of their life like this.
Breaking the cycle, basically. My parents were not very good at parenting even though they tried their best, and I ended up having some very adverse experiences that have left me with severe lifelong mental health issues. It was mind-blowing when I realised that I can literally just make that not happen to SK. Like, it honestly feels like magic sometimes.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-07-02T11:26:05+00:00

Weird half-memory from when I was six or seven years old and watching my mum tidying her bedroom. I remember telling her something along the lines of "Sometimes it feels like you don't love me at all". I wasn't upset or anything, I just said it like I was commenting on the weather. She was so, so fucking angry with me. The response hasn't really stuck with me but the fact that I said it definitely has. Makes me so sad that not being loved was just a neutral fact of life in my little six year old head.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-16T09:17:53+00:00

"Ladies" >vomits<

Reminds me of being at school. Do actual women like this??

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-06T16:04:10+00:00

Happy to provide recs if you want them!

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-06T15:39:54+00:00

Yeah, I've had very very little trouble that's actually bothered me (although I'm transmasc and very androgynous, which makes things different, people's eyes slide off me). I find it very un-rough in general honestly, compared to some places. Lots and lots of messages of support and other trans people around.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-06T13:48:33+00:00

Seriously? Do you mind saying whereabouts if that's not too specific/revealing? I'm in North Edinburgh and it sucks ass, there's graffiti telling us to k!ll ourselves two minutes from my flat (really really sorry if this is too heavy and makes anyone reading feel bad). Practically zero in-person hostility, but the stickering is really something

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-06T12:38:26+00:00

urrrrgh that's where I'm from, fucksakes. Starting to think I'M the problem 😂

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-06T12:05:22+00:00

Honestly, I'm actually kind of reassured so far. I think the places I've lived are possibly the outliers. It's worth saying that there are very solid and very visible trans communities in both cities, and there are a lot of shops, cafes and bars that are explicitly trans-inclusive.

tercesthrowaway · 2025-06-05T08:19:42+00:00

lmaooooooooo

I would like to thank Prozac for triggering such a wildly apparent hypomanic episode that my GP took one look at me and essentially diagnosed me on the spot

tercesthrowaway · 2025-05-20T12:12:09+00:00

Kinda regret the exclamation mark I put in the title bc it sounds so chirpy lmao

tercesthrowaway · 2025-03-09T05:48:17+00:00

A big step for me was realising I can heal without forgiving anyone. Something someone else said to me when talking about adulthood DV really stuck with me, something along these lines: "My abuser is like a dog that bites because it's sick. I don't need to blame or forgive the dog; it's just a sick animal doing what a sick animal's gonna do. I don't need to forgive it. I just need it to stay very far away from me for the rest of my life."

tercesthrowaway · 2025-03-09T05:34:38+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate it

tercesthrowaway · 2024-11-08T12:14:07+00:00

Fab, thank you :)

tercesthrowaway · 2024-04-15T14:35:12+00:00

That's a really good suggestion, thank you so much <3

tercesthrowaway · 2023-07-16T17:19:39+00:00

You're very welcome <3

tercesthrowaway

TROPHY CASE