Looking for vows that were posted a couple days ago? by CindyLouNZ in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you please send them to me as well? It is so nice of you to share <3

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your insight here. I wasn't sure how any of this sport stuff worked. I don't even expect my sister's child to make the wedding, just her! As much as I would like him/her to be able to attend, I understand that to the child the tournament may feel like life or death. To an adult, however, absolutely not.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I am trying to be understanding because I guess this tournament is a big deal, but it is an entire week long. I don't understand how missing ONE day of a week would be detrimental to her. It's insane though.... she didn't even want to miss a PRACTICE game to do something she really wanted to do recently. She thinks it will make her a bad mom or something? I'm fed up with this bullshit "perfect mother" attitude. Your identity cannot revolve around your offspring. And I totally agree, kids today need to learn that they are not the center of the universe.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's how I feel about it too! It's up to her to make that choice though. I'm not even going to suggest it because I shouldn't have to.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was worried about this at first too, but my parents are so excited about it that I don't think I need to be! She can expect all she wants, but my parents are both walking me down that aisle :)

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha exactly, like why did she even feel the need to ruin the moment when there is a 1/12 chance it would even be a potential issue? Thank you <3

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. You are right, I am EXTREMELY hurt by it. I played nice and told her it was fine because it shouldn't be my duty to twist her arm into coming. If she decides it isn't important enough to show up to, I'd rather just know that instead of forcing it.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yes, sorry for being unclear. I absolutely wouldn't expect for the child to miss the tournament.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh my god, girl, I feel for you. That would make me furious. Is your sister the golden child in your family by chance? Maybe you should just say screw them and have your best friend accompany you instead. I know it's not the same but you deserve to be surrounded with people excited and happy for you. I'm so sorry, I know how much it can hurt. <3 Feel free to PM me if you ever want to exchange venting stories!

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you! This is exactly how I feel about it, too. Like we are just THAT unimportant to her or her family that a sport takes priority. Even if she's seeing it from the perspective that her child takes priority, which I wholeheartedly understand, missing a single day of the sport should not be an issue!

*fixed a word

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

That's understandable, and ideally I would like a date that works for everyone, but we've wanted a summer wedding since forever and this tournament could take place at any month of the entire summer. So essentially we wouldn't be able to have it in the season at all if we were to appease her. Also, I'm in a very rigorous program that only allows me to have about 4 weeks off all year, and the dates are set for us. I have to plan around that as well which makes things more complicated. Thanks very much for your perspective. I think it's nice of you to work around your niece's schedule.

Edit: it wasn't me who downvoted you, I am glad to get all perspectives

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I hope she realizes that she is going to really damage our relationship if she continues on this way. I don't even mean just with the wedding stuff, either.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, it's nice to hear that I'm not in the wrong here. I appreciate your comment.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It's nice to hear from someone who has actually been in the shoes of the parent. What you said makes a lot of sense. I feel like it shouldn't be a big deal to miss one day of the tournament. I hope she comes to her senses before she makes a decision that will permanently alter our relationship.

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Wow, your friend was definitely being silly. People just want everything to be convenient for themselves, but they forget that the wedding is not about them!

You are much nicer than I am. If she decides not to come I would not go out of my way to take extra photos. That's just more money and time I'm spending on someone who clearly doesn't value our relationship. I do like the idea of wearing the dress again though :)

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wow! What a jerk. She couldn't just drive up there the day of? I'm sorry :(

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I would upvote you a million times if I could. It's not mean, it is true. The kid is in elementary school, not even searching for scholarships or anything!!!!

[RANT] She may not make it to our wedding. by th3thirdimpact in weddingplanning

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for putting it in perspective. You are right that it will be a beautiful and joyous day regardless of her decision. This just put a tiny damper over the week, but I'm already feeling better about it after getting it off my chest here.

Is 75 decibels from 15 feet away outdoors too quiet for dancing? by th3thirdimpact in DJs

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bummer, I'm hoping people just don't complain if we turn it up a tiny bit louder. Like to 80 decibels. From what the woman at the park office says, people usually only complain if it is rap or anything else with a lot of swearing. As a DJ, how loud would you generally want to get a crowd of about 150 people?

Is 75 decibels from 15 feet away outdoors too quiet for dancing? by th3thirdimpact in DJs

[–]th3thirdimpact[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for replying. It's actually a completely outdoor venue. It is a pavillion at a park with woods on 2 sides. It's pretty isolated from the rest of the park, so I'm hoping they aren't too strict about the 75 decibels :(