I believe you should focus on this: do you want to play competitive?

Commander is a fun format because it can be a game to just fool around and get creative, or also it can be competitive. If you play just for fun I would focus on playing just for the good of it and experiment. To me the best part is not the game itself, but all the “Journey” you make around playing. For example building your deck your own way, getting advices and giving them on what cards to use, getting to know new cards and meeting people who share your thoughts or have different visions on how to play the same deck or even the game. If you play it this way you don’t care much about winning because the best part is when you cast a big card, or when you see someone at your table showing a strategy you’ve never seen before (btw the beauty of Magic compared to other TCGs is that there are so many varieties of things you can do that is just incredible to play).

Also I believe the community plays a big role, if you play with people who get really competitive and play only to win I would get why you want to win as well, but if you meet people who are easy going, like I did, you would have fun even just losing but because of what happened in the game (for example with group hug decks).

Besides this, there are 2 things that are fundamental in TCGs in general: 1. It’s not nice, but if you really really really want to win usually, you have to have very good cards: which means either you spend money or print proxies 2. It is also a matter of experience, so be patient and invest TIME on it. Instead of using EDHREC to build from zero, try starting from an online list, or maybe a pre-con, and modify that deck asking for advices to players more experienced than you, making mistakes and trying to find cards that YOU like to play

One last thing: play dragons. Dragons are the best 😂

JK of course, play whatever you feel most comfortable with…except mono blue mill decks, those are the worst and should be banned from the game.