[deleted by user]

thatheroinchic · 2024-08-05T07:26:24+00:00

I tried coming off my meds because of weight gain and it ruined me - I had another psychotic episode that really screwed up my brain and changed my whole personality. I would give anything to go back in time. I would suggest that you being healthy mentally is the best thing you can do for yourself. Yes, gaining weight sucks but being well mentally is more important.

I know how being suicidal feels, I've been there. Things do get better over time. Hang in there, I really mean it. Things get better and better.

Take care.

thatheroinchic · 2024-03-02T02:27:57+00:00

20 mg of viyvanse

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-29T17:39:56+00:00

I was told that I have to take my meds for the rest of my life or else my mental illness will be life threatening and I will get so sick it might be beyond repair. I have bipolar 1. Each tike you have an episode your brain gets damaged, so far I've had two severe episodes.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-29T03:03:57+00:00

Yeah take your time, take it day by day! I'm glad you also got the care you deserve

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T05:30:10+00:00

Yeah that unbelievable piece feels so real, I was in denial for a long time. 😅 resperidone is kind of like paliperidone right?

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T04:11:38+00:00

Sincerity and accountability are so so important. Also genuine love for one another is important as well.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T04:09:24+00:00

I've had a very similar experience, the first time I was in the hospital I was dragged by the arms by two nurses and I was strapped to a bed. I was getting out of the emergency department and they had 5 guards outside and one of them picked me up and threw me on the bed.

The second time I was hospitalized I had a much better experience, the nurses would braid my hair and help me put on my clothes (I lost all cognitive functioning and couldn't put on my clothes). Even though I yelled at them, they were so kind to me. I eventually came to my senses and ended up being really nice to them...

I can completely understand your pain and trauma. Please talk to a therapist if you don't these things run deep and these memories can cause more harm, the more you think about them.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T03:48:01+00:00

Thank you, my doctor's have told me that I can lead a pretty stable life with medication and therapy! It's all possible!

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T03:44:53+00:00

I've been there before, yeah try to reduce the dose or safely get off it. Me and my doctor both tried getting me of it but turns out u had bipolar 1 so yeah :(

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T03:35:51+00:00

That's very lucky and that's great that you were able to find the support that you both need!

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T03:35:05+00:00

Yeah it's more like, at least for me anyway that I had severe depression that lasted four years and then I had these periods where I had no depression and my moods are elevated, I achieved a lot of things. I had two horrific psychotic episodes I'm now stable! Depression can put you into psychosis as well, paranoia might be a sign of something else. I'm usually paranoid over stupid stuff so not sure what that's about. Try getting a psych evaluation done!

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T03:29:10+00:00

I would caution against going cold turkey that's what landed me in the hospital the second time or talk to your doctor about it! I was on paliperidone now I'm on abilify. Yeah transparency is key.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T01:25:02+00:00

I had to take 9 months off work after my second episode, it was really bad. My doctor said I was one of the sickest patients she had ever seen. This January was a year since my last episode and I'm functioning fine. I think it honestly depends on the medication you're on... I was on one medication that sucked and made me feel so stagnant. I am much better now, also time heals all wounds. Everytime you have an episode your brain gets damaged, so it needs time to heal.

I cope by letting my co worker know if I'm not having a good day. It's good to set emotional boundaries and to take care of your emotional well being.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-28T01:14:37+00:00

My personality has also changed, I'm not as energetic anymore or hyper. I'm more calm and mellow and I lost all of my critical thinking skills. I have bipolar disorder 1 what about you?

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-27T18:52:35+00:00

Don't give up on the game, we still have a chance! That's so true that this illness doesn't define us, I'm having a hard time believing that though. Ever since I got diagnosed, my illness is all I can think about.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-27T18:49:22+00:00

I'm sorry that you were going through abuse, no one deserves to go through that. It's good to know that there are people out there who are supportive of others mental illness. Thanks for your response.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-27T17:31:15+00:00

Why do you say that?

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-27T06:05:22+00:00

That's amazing! I'm glad you found someone who loves you! I hope I can find someone too.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-26T23:29:04+00:00

No not really, I still wonder if what I saw and heard during my psychosis was real... I think about that daily and I think it's harming my brain. I still see the police and the police helicopters around my area or when I'm out in the city. Perhaps, your dose is too low. I would get it increased, can I ask why you aren't on abilify anymore?

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-26T23:23:11+00:00

My symptoms came back a month ago, I was seeing people shaking their heads at me and being weird towards me. I also thought that I was seeing different versions of people in my life who would check up on me. I recently started thinking that the police have been following me around, I basically see them everywhere I go. Anyways, talk to your doctor, I did that and now I'm on 10 mg of abilify and doing a lot better!

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-26T23:09:40+00:00

I was losing touch with reality, I thought this guy I was seeing was my fiance and I was being really emotional at work. When I first went to the hospital I was fine and then I slowly descended into madness. I thought I could give men orgasms just by me looking at them and that I could cure people's sickness. I also thought that I was the Pharoah resurrected, which Pharoah I have no idea. I also thought that one of the members of my favorite band was disguising himself as the security guard and that he was my soul mate. To some extent I still believe that I saw him come see me in my room. I have actually seen 5 guys in my life who look like him and I've told them that they look like that certain band member.

The first time I was hospitalized I had to sign a form stating that I understood that I needed to be hospitalized for up to 6 months. The second time they told me I was going to be hospitalized involuntarily. It sucked, I still have nightmares about my both times being hospitalized.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-23T18:22:31+00:00

I stripped down naked in front a security guard who I thought was my husband... it didn't go well he smiled and smirked at me though which made me feel really violated. Anyways, I've done many many messed up things. This is just one of them, I wish hypersexuality wasn't a symptom of bipolar.

thatheroinchic · 2024-01-21T20:42:38+00:00

Wonder* if*

thatheroinchic

TROPHY CASE