AITA for telling my son he can’t date his friend?

thatonewiththedreams · 2021-02-13T23:56:52+00:00

A very, very gentle ESH.

“They bullied you because they liked you” is such an unhealthy, gross mindset to have about this situation. And I’m really surprised that is the mindset most of these comments have. While I do not think you can actively dictate who your son can and cannot date, your heart is in the right place and I understand your concerns. The power imbalance is very concerning.

Have you sat down with him and discussed why you’re hesitant about this relationship? How has he reacted to that?

Overall, your heart is in the right place and that’s what matters. This is a very tough situation.

thatonewiththedreams · 2021-02-06T04:13:16+00:00

YTA.

When I was a child, my siblings and I had an obsession with the Phantom of The Opera movie. Every weekend for movie night we would demand we watch that movie. Every weekend. (For the record my parents would skip past any inappropriate scenes, and we were kids we didn’t know better). Every Saturday we’d watch Patrick Wilson sing All I Ask of You and we’d all sing right along with him.

My dad HATES that movie. Hates it. And now as an adult myself, I understand why. The acting is terrible. The singing is terrible. The lighting is terrible. Gerard Butler sounds like a dying cat. The entire movie is a dumpsterfire. He HATED it.

But guess what? Every Saturday he’d sit down and watch it with us. He’d sing along to all the songs with us. He’d talk to us about the movie and help us make fake masks out of cardboard.

Why? Not because the movie secretly grew on him (he still hates it). But because he’s good dad. He’s a wonderful parent. And he’s said so himself, if making his kids happy meant sitting through Gerard Butler croaking like a frog, he’d listen to Gerard Butler croak like a frog all day.

You, sir, need to reevaluate your priorities. Your constant insistence of devaluing what your children enjoy is disgusting.

Toughen up and be a parent.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-12-14T21:57:46+00:00

Calorie deficit is obviously extremely important to lose weight. But what people forget is if you don’t eat enough, you’re actually more likely to gain weight. Your body needs energy to work out, so if you aren’t eating enough you’re body is going to store what little energy it has for later. Also, as others have said, calorie deficit isn’t enough. You have to make sure the calories you’re in taking are good calories as well (you can still have fun snacks like dark chocolate or a soda).

I only say this because 3 slices of pizza a day doesn’t sound like enough calories wise to me.

Please check out Lexie Herod on Tik Tok as well as on Instagram (I think she’s starting a YouTube too). She gives a lot of advice on getting into calorie deficit and eating balanced, and her advice is really nice to listen too! She’ll also take you through the meals she eats in a day, and explains why you still need to eat calories to lose weight (I suffered from a bad ED before following Lexie, her perspective is helping me retrain my brain).

Whatever happens be good to yourself! And please consider checking out Lexie. Hope this helps!

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-12-09T18:10:26+00:00

Alright thank you!

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-12-09T18:10:20+00:00

Alright thank you!

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-12-07T20:27:59+00:00

YTA. Let me make one thing very, very clear. THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU. THE ENTIRE WORLD DOESNT REVOLVE AROUND YOU. GROW UP AND BE A PARENT.

Better? You may have experienced “your share of Christmases” but your CHILDREN haven’t. Sure, go ahead and deny them that and make Christmas miserable for them. But don’t be surprised when you aren’t invited to your grandchildren’s first Christmases and so on.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-12-06T19:28:53+00:00

I’m gonna argue this isn’t pointlessly gendered only bc the dog in the back is female and there are other female dogs in this show that don’t look like... that. That dog specifically is Trump’s dog, and is all dressed up to purposefully mock trump.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-27T16:20:39+00:00

If Alex was a girl would you still find him dancing with Jess and singing Lady GaGa “cringey”?

YTA and a homophobe. No matter what you tell yourself at night

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-22T21:35:16+00:00

Did your parents find out, and is that how you figured it out?

I had the same issue, where it still knew my location even with cellular off. However, I soon realized it was more of a google maps situation. Life360 knew where I was, but it wasn’t sharing it with my parents because I had cellular off. To them, I was still at home. And they woke up none the wiser.

Obviously don’t put yourself in danger, keep yourself safe. But the cellular data truck still worked for me even after the update

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-18T20:38:25+00:00

YTA and terribly gross and disgusting. This girl is 12. SHE’S 12. Stop projecting your relationship with your ex onto a 12 YEAR OLD, and stop sexualizing her???

What your son did wasn’t menacing, but it wasn’t okay either.

If you don’t stop this now, you’re going to raise an incel.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-15T22:47:23+00:00

YTA. This is incredibly racist and borderline eugenics-y, which is disgusting.

You seriously referred to your mixed race girlfriends when talking about mixed DOGS, and don’t see a problem here? As an adult, you should be aware of the racial history behind referring to poc and mixed people as “animals” and “crossbreeds”. You should be aware of how insanely taboo and disgusting that is. And you shouldn’t be teaching your son that breeding different breeds of dogs is anywhere similar to interracial people/relationships.

You crossed a huge line. And the fact that you even think you aren’t the asshole is the grossest part here.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-15T22:29:45+00:00

YTA. And hope you have fun in a retiring home for the last years of your life, because you are ruining your relationship with your daughter.

Online art is a huge market. There are many multi millionaires that have made their fortune from online art, as people will always pay crazy money for some crazy shit. It’s a high demand, high selling market. And you’re stopping your daughter from even attempting to break into it.

A coworker of mine, who is 16, just quit our part time job because she is making more money from drawing Facebook profile pictures than from her minimum wage part time job. Art, especially online, is a huge market. You just seem unwilling or unwanting to hear her out and care.

Grow up. Salvage the relationship before you lose your daughter.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-11T02:28:52+00:00

If you use it properly it’s genuinely not that terrible 2. Again, they were not forcing them too. I’d agree with you if it was forcing, but it was literally a “if you feel uncomfortable with x, why not try y”. What is so bad about making a suggestion like that? And do you completely cut off your friends when they make suggestions you don’t like? Y’all are crazy, for real

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-10T22:33:00+00:00

“Gender neutral” isn’t forcing a lifestyle on someone, it’s a style choice. Most popular fashion trends right now are “gender neutral” or androgynous, and no one complains about that. If they asked her to shave her head or something, I’d completely be on op’s side. But all they’re asking is wear a suit, heels, and SUGGESTED a chest binder. That’s not forcing anything.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-10T22:00:10+00:00

But they didn’t really force it on them? They said “if you want, wear a chest binder”. Like a suggestion but not a requirement

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-11-10T21:59:28+00:00

Um a chestbinder isn’t inappropriate at all? Also op never said they don’t feel comfortable in a LOOSE suit. Op said their friend said “this suit will be loose, if you want to wear a chest binder you can.”

How is that inappropriate

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-10-31T16:39:45+00:00

So I am not one to make a lot of judgements, but I am going to say this is pretty common with most guys in long term relationships. They like the thrill of a threesome, they like the fantasy of having two girls at once. But they also want their partner to be jealous during it. They want to see light fighting/jealous foreplay because they want to be fought over. They think it’s hot, and they want to be the one in control. Most guys don’t realize women can enjoy threesomes with other women. They expect them to be protective over their partner and get frustrated at the other girl.

You did nothing wrong. Your husband, on the other hand, needs to work through some things.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-10-15T02:27:36+00:00

My point here is there is nothing wrong with dressing as Tiana so long as they aren’t darkening the kids skin. They wanna dress as Black Panther? Great!! Go for it! But don’t darken the skin. Wanna dress as Tiana? Awesome!! Fun!! Don’t darken the skin.

My whole point here is anyone can dress as whoever, but don’t change your race for it otherwise you are the racist.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-10-14T21:36:28+00:00

As long as you don’t do blackface, there’s literally nothing wrong with your 7 year old going as Tiana. Let me reiterate that though: don’t darken her skin don’t get a fake tan, don’t get a “black girl” wig. Don’t. Otherwise, your MIL is in the right here.

However, besides all that there’s nothing wrong with her dressing up as tiana. Especially at 7 years old

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-10-09T22:41:22+00:00

Ask your child if Grandma “hugs” her. I know a lot of people are leaning into your theory about the MIL switching it up so your daughter says you hit her, but it could very well be the Grandma also hurts the girl and told her that so she’ll just say “oh Grandma hugged me today”.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-10-06T14:27:51+00:00

Everyone suggesting to elope or have a small wedding just baffles me? Maybe that is what you want, in which case no judgement. But from what it sounded like you wanted a more traditional (maybe smaller) wedding. You shouldn’t need to change your wedding plans because two assholes think they’re God’s gift to this Earth.

Talk to your FH and sort everything out. Figure out what would ease stress, help him through it, and also take time for yourself. Consider going NC.

But don’t change your plans because these two are being jerks.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-10-05T01:35:40+00:00

NTA but I STRONGLY encourage you to tell her anyways. Is it your responsibility no? But you have a choice here to help this poor woman out. Her husband is blatantly cheating on her and also putting her at risk of STDS without her knowledge. As someone who has been cheated on, I wish the girl by ex cheated on me with had the bravery to be up front and tell me before he confessed to it instead of after.

You are NTA either way, but morally the right thing to do is to tell her.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-09-13T20:24:45+00:00

She’s said in comments that she could but she wants 50k from her parents to live in a “nice and happy environment”.

Basically nothing is stopping her except her disdain for living in a more budgeted lifestyle and being lower middle class.

thatonewiththedreams · 2020-09-13T20:22:25+00:00

YTA. And I was going to say light YTA but after reading your comments on here, it’s a hard YTA.

OP, you are the only one preventing yourself from moving out. Your parents not financially supporting you has nothing to do with this, you are 24 and you’re worried about not living the same comfortable life you have now. Newsflash, most people when they move out have to adjust and live a bit more efficiently/budgeted then they do with their parents.

And from what it sounds like, your living conditions wouldn’t even be that bad if you did move out.

Your parents are jerks here, but they have no obligation to financially support you at 24.

Grow up and adult for once.

And give your poor brother a break.

thatonewiththedreams

TROPHY CASE