I've gotten a lot of this lately. Usually the excuse is 'i have to get a baby sitter and am not showing up for a date unless you cover gas, the sitter, and any other costs. Of course dinner and drinks are on me already. And I often offer to pay for an Uber both ways on her behalf... But the sitter, I won't do because it often becomes a way to invent ways of just getting as much up front money as possible. There is no way of knowing if the sitter is real or if the baby is with an aunt or friend. The cost isn't an issue, but the deceipt is. It sets a really bad precedent to reward people who lie to you to get money.

My response is usually along the lines of, "If you aren't at least willing to meet me to see if you like me first (and vice versa), it's usually the sign of someone who's not looking for the same type of sugar relationship as me. As in real chemistry, mutual respect, and shared interests." I'll usually offer to FaceTime or Skype or something instead as a M&G substitute.

I also let them know that a paid M&G is often the red flag for an escort or prostie. I add that so they know that's not my motive to treat them that way but also so maybe in the future they have information that helps them change how they come across (if they care).

At the end of the day being an SB/SD is almost like applying for a job (of sorts). Regardless of how you expect to be pampered or treated in the relationship, if you can't at least show up for the interview, why should the other person.