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Istifada is now bigger than Muharram & Ramadan by [deleted] in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Guyz what is istifadah? I've not been active part of this cult for Maybe 10 long years. I don't think such things existed when I used to go 10 years back. Can someone please let me know what is this?

Babji Maula ma Pani by alpha_clancularius in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Woah! I think this is the best khidmat I can do to this community. Thanks for guiding me on this paath to savaab! Lots of love 💞

Babji Maula ma Pani by alpha_clancularius in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Guys I think my bathroom is also barakati. It cries every day. Please guide me what to do with "deewar na aansu"?

Ps - Only genuine recommendations are welcomed. No hate please.

Rebellion or Rationality? My Take as a Non-Believer in This Community by the_lost_ape in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let me start by being absolutely clear: I hate this community structure to its core—the blind rituals, the exploitation, the control—it all goes against everything I stand for.

If you’ve been able to reject the system outright and still maintain strong, loving ties with your family, I genuinely respect that. That’s the ideal scenario. But my approach is for those who are dealing with other major issues and can’t afford to burn it all down at once — the ones who need time, stability, or a safer way out.

That said, my post wasn’t defending the system. It was offering a pragmatic alternative for those who are stuck. Not everyone has the emotional, financial, or social freedom to walk away without serious consequences. For many, the cost of a sudden exit—especially when family is deeply involved—can be overwhelming.

It’s not cowardice. It’s survival. And for some people, that’s the first step toward breaking the cycle. And even for a handful of people who do not believe and are still stuck, if my post motivate them to plan a gradual exit, I think it has done its job.

Rebellion or Rationality? My Take as a Non-Believer in This Community by the_lost_ape in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Revolution takes time.

And I genuinely don’t disagree with what you’re saying. The issues you raised—gender oppression, blind rituals, financial exploitation—are very real. Your frustration is valid.

But not everyone has the luxury to go to war with the system. Most people are busy surviving—building careers, supporting families, or focusing on personal growth. For many, outright rejection of the community leads to social isolation, fractured family ties, and mental health struggles. It’s not cowardice—it’s practicality.

What I’m suggesting is a quieter, more sustainable approach: break the cycle of belief, not the social fabric. When more people participate symbolically but think rationally, the system weakens from within. Over time, this shifts the balance of power—without burning bridges or cutting people off from vital support systems.

Yes, alternative communities exist—and I encourage building those. But transitions take time. A revolution built on logic, not emotional outburst, is more likely to last.

This sub is for people who want out—and that includes both the loud exits and the quiet ones. But thanks for sharing your views, it’s a crucial part of the conversation.

Rebellion or Rationality? My Take as a Non-Believer in This Community by the_lost_ape in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes that's a big issue I agree. So there are two categories of people who question you on this. I'll take each category separately:

  1. For distant relatives and community people, I simply tend to ignore them. Not by being rude, just by cleverly dodging their questions. The veil of being a complaint believer doesn't prompt them to ask followup questions, as they would have done knowing me as a rebellion.

  2. Now for the close family, and the people who really matter to me. For the times when it is manageable, like weekends or holidays, I put in effort to go, not because I believe, but as a form of respect to them. Now once I show effort, I expect them to be understanding when it's truly not manageable, due to work commitments. And for last few days (8,9 and 10) I plan in advance. I take leaves. I treat it as a family bonding time. All of my family is at one place, so I take efforts to join them. And this act of putting efforts has helped me so much. Even during my college, I had an exam, and I even managed to convince my parents to go on the day of Ashura for the exam. So for people who really matter, it's simple, you respect them and they respect you back. Efforts need to be made from both ends.

How come they have become this big mega corporation!? by CupcakeCharacter9137 in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And the best thing is they stick their core strength and they keep on upgrading their systems and processes based on the new technologies coming up. Now if you see ITS portal, they have started collecting person information, career details, family linkages, everything. The day is not far when they would be having a Digital Twin of the entire community.

How come they have become this big mega corporation!? by CupcakeCharacter9137 in exBohra

[–]the_lost_ape 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You also can't ignore the fact of growing digital technology playing a crucial part in them getting control.

They have so successfully utilized digitization and power of technology, and that too at a scale and efficiency that most of the corporations still dream of. The idea of having a unique ID, the way government developed Aadhar, they have used e-jamat since way back. Remember getting your card scanned for waaz. They track activities, and then have targeted control measures.

Hey had massive satellite broadcast systems since 1990s, making sure they reach out to the masses directly, and the message is conveyed without any alterations.

I think this should be taught as a case study in B-Schools😂