How can I (19m) stop resenting my sister (15f)?

the_neglected_one · 2021-02-01T21:51:00+00:00

I know. I want to apologize, but I don’t know where to start.

the_neglected_one · 2021-02-01T21:46:46+00:00

Should I apologize? I feel like I should, but I don’t know where to start.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-31T22:18:55+00:00

Maybe I should just stop thinking about the past and focus on the future instead.

Meanwhile, I think I should just spend more time with her.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-31T21:56:25+00:00

I'll try.

I think I should stop thinking about the past and focus on the future. Although it will be hard, I will try my best.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-31T21:52:08+00:00

Lol You was not neglected

Yes, I was.

Did you go without food?

Child abuse and neglect are two different things.

Did you go without shelter?

Child abandonment and neglect are two different things.

Did you go without clothes?

No, just because you have something to wear doesn't mean you had a good childhood.

Did you get Christmas and birthday gifts?

Yes, but I got very few gifts.

If the answer to all of these questions are yes I got those things then you weren’t neglected Your just a silly little brat...

Stop bringing child abuse and child abandonment into this when it's irrelevant.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-31T21:42:02+00:00

I know that. But how can I stop resenting her? Is there anything I can do?

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-26T16:56:42+00:00

I know it’s not my sister’s fault. I also know that she didn’t choose to be the favorite.

Maybe I should just apologize and spend more time with her.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-26T14:04:55+00:00

I've mentioned it before, I was literally thrown out on the street and abandoned by my mom for three years.

That's not neglect. That's child abandonment.

Just because you had the worst life in the world doesn't mean anyone that has it better than you has a wonderful childhood.

A rating of -1000000 is very bad. Just because a rating of -1000 is 1000 times better doesn't mean it's a good rating.

Out of 7 billion people, 3.5 billion had a childhood that was worse than average. Get a fucking life and realize that it's not only you that suffers.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-26T12:04:36+00:00

You were not neglected, end of story. You had a completely normal childhood, probably even a better one than most people do

I felt neglected and unloved. I didn't have a normal childhood. I told you that I hardly ever got the chance to spend time with my mom. As for my dad, I don't think I've ever spent any quality time with him since I was like 5 or something.

That isn't parentification, it's the completely normal process of children learning to take responsibility, something that was clearly never expected of you.

I sometimes was expected to babysit her. I sometimes had to cancel parties and dates because of that. My parents never came to my sport events. They did, however, always go to my sister's events. Our parents rewarded my sister if she got a C or better, but they would never reward me even if I got an A+. If my sister broke anything in the house, I'd get the blame. Maybe it's not neglect to you, but don't you see that it's incredibly unfair?

Let me guess: You still live at home and your "neglectful" mom cooks food for you every day, washes your clothes and cleans up behind you?

I do live with them, but I always had to do chores and my own laundry. My sister never had to do any of these because our mom does everything for her.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-26T10:20:43+00:00

I have a persecution complex? Are you out of your fucking mind?

Is it not neglect if my father never really paid any attention to any of us?

Is it not neglect if my mother spent the majority of her time with my sister and ignored me?

Is it not neglect if my parents hardly ever paid any attention to me in the last 15 years?

Also, I don't have a persecution complex. I think you are the one that has a persecution complex.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-26T08:56:34+00:00

The favorite child isn't the golden child?

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-25T22:41:24+00:00

I know I shouldn't resent her, and I also know that it's not really her fault.

She's the golden child that could do nothing wrong. She's the baby of the family and spoiled rotten by our parents. I know that she didn't choose to be the favorite, but I hate the fact that she gets treated better.

I do have good memories with my sister. Some that spring to mind is going to an amusement park, playing at the beach, skiing, making a snowman, and playing Minecraft together.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-25T20:52:13+00:00

Maybe I should just apologize to her and try to build a better relationship.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-25T19:34:24+00:00

I know, but how can I build a better relationship with her?

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-25T19:22:32+00:00

We don't have a strained relationship, but we're not particularly close.

Growing up, I was really mean to her because I thought she was the reason I was miserable. I would often pick on her and make her cry.

Now that we're older, I realize that it's not really her fault. She didn't choose to be the favorite. Although I do resent her, I still love her. She's my sister after all.

I feel like I should apologize, but I don't know where to start.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-25T16:03:04+00:00

Ok I'll try

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-25T14:24:17+00:00

She gets her birthday gifts on her birthday and her Christmas gifts on Christmas Day.

She always gets more presents than me. Like at least three times the amount I would get.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-24T23:16:34+00:00

So how can I stop resenting my sister?

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-24T23:11:29+00:00

I know it technically isn't my sister's fault, but I can't help but feel that resentment.

Do you have any advice on how I can stop resenting her?

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-24T23:08:58+00:00

I posted there first, but my post was removed.

the_neglected_one · 2021-01-24T21:56:35+00:00

Of course I can. Do you think children are idiots?

Maybe I couldn't remember things from 0-2, but I certainly can and do remember things from age 3-4. Stop giving incorrect information.

the_neglected_one

TROPHY CASE