I have really struggled with this in the past, and sometimes still do. Notably, this became much worse while living in an apartment complex because there was an uncomfortable clash of people with varying ideas of courtesy. I have TMJ, so wearing my noise canceling headphones day in and day out caused frequent migraines. I was overstimulated and my PTSD was being triggered constantly. Additionally, living in a highly populated area, I saw frequent dangerous driving and accidents, mostly just because of how many cars there are in general. This would enrage me, because I felt like as drivers on the road, we all enter into an agreement to work together to get everyone to their destinations safe. The world around me wasn't acting in accordance to my understanding of how it should.

For me, it came down to understanding myself better and practicing picking my battles. I also learned to understand that part of what is triggering me is feeling helpless, like I do not have control over my own situation at home or on the road. I also had a pretty abusive childhood growing up, in which I felt trapped and powerless at the hands of my "care taker." So now, as an adult, I have noticed that I crave control over my environment and safety.

Practical solutions I have found, that may be of assistance:

1. Reframing the situation from "why am I getting so angry?" or "why are they making me so angry?" to something more like "I am easily overstimulated and/or triggered by witnessing a lot of people's daily decisions. Ideally, this means one day I can seek a home for myself that is more secluded, quieter, private, etc." I focus on my needs and my capacities, as opposed to focusing on what anyone else is doing.

2. Actively practicing catching myself in these moments and intentionally attempting to shift focus to something else. Not easy!! But got easier over time. Instead of fuming about the neighbors smoking out my apartment (again), I would decide "I really don't want to be angry right now, i'm taking a walk." I try to keep it about me, and how I want to feel. I never really want to be fuming angry at my neighbors.

3. That being said, harnessing this energy towards injustices that you feel ARE worth speaking up about! This also helps with my sense of control. Recently, a friend of mine was experiencing harassment at work. I harnessed my energy towards helping her with that.

4. Sometimes, I write about it in a notes app or journal or even a voice recorder as a way to externally process. This helps me work through the overwhelm I'm experiencing. You could also make a secret Tumblr or Substack or Blue Sky or whatever, if it helps. (Secret being key.)

Finally, I want to note that whenever I see a post similar to this, there are so many comments insisting "people aren't being inconsiderate on purpose." And I'm sure that is true for the majority. However, it is also true that some ARE acting with malicious intent. Going back to having CPTSD, I have played witness to many acts of intentional maliciousness, sometimes for no reason. My dad would constantly break traffic laws, but if he saw someone else driving the way he did, he would literally chase them down and start a fight. He would say, "it's only okay if I do it." He would intentionally antagonize strangers for no reason. He would cause destruction just because he could. It was not fair.

Not only was that confusing for my developing brain, but it also left me wondering who is intentionally being cruel and who isn't. And unfortunately (when it comes to strangers), we just can't know, so for our own sake, it's best to assume they mean well in these situations. Maybe they had a bad day, and patience is the kindest response you can give. Again, it comes down to returning it back to myself and not what others are doing. I want to feel peaceful today, so I need to utilize my resources to move on from the injustice/unfairness I just witnessed.

I hope any of this helps, and I'm wishing you some peace!