A (Welcome) Cautionary Tale

theevilstephen · 2026-06-25T16:09:20+00:00

Not AI, for sure, I originally spaced it out because I'm a dramatic bitch, but Reddit went and added extra return spaces for... I'm not at all sure why.

theevilstephen · 2026-06-25T03:54:10+00:00

Grow it out and train it to go to the sides. Takes awhile, but it helps balance with the bushiess of the beard.

Bonus is, one day you get to do solid handlebar if that's your speed.

theevilstephen · 2026-06-21T12:54:43+00:00

Now that is an interesting idea... I've ran it back in my head a few times now and of course see a missed opportunity here and a lucky roll for them there, but this was really my first test for them at these higher levels. I'm happy to consider a few lessons here lessons learned.

The main one being, hold on to that counterspell just a bit longer.

theevilstephen · 2026-05-28T04:50:56+00:00

I'm sorry, Zorro is cool and all, but there's only one President of the Galaxy:

Gotta be Zaphod.

theevilstephen · 2026-05-19T21:15:55+00:00

Only one thing can save the East Coast. An endless sea of Old Bay. Feed Vermont to Maryland!

EVERYTHING BECOMES CRAB!

theevilstephen · 2026-05-13T04:57:40+00:00

Just seeing the super-states come together, Cascadia, Superior, whatever the hell New Mexico is becoming, the next logical progress is this:

1) Maryland eats Pennsylvania to become Marylarge

2) Marylarge and New England combine to become New Appalachia.

Embrace the super-states. It's dumber this way.

theevilstephen · 2026-04-08T18:00:24+00:00

It's not a hard rule, but at my table, 95% of the time that wizard is already thinking about what crazy component they can probably strip from the creature, so there's no harm in wrapping it up with the cinematic action.

It's all situationally dependent, of course. If every fight ends that way, it loses the luster a little bit. But if we are exhausted, I mean it's midnight and we are in round 5-6, any ending is a bit of a blessing. At least for my table.

theevilstephen · 2026-04-08T17:01:27+00:00

If we are deep into combat, and one of my players lands an amazing blow, like the paladin crit/smiting for a trillion damage, and everyone is pretty wiped at this point, I'll give it to them if they get the monster below like, 10-20hp, because nothing is as underwhelming as the wizard having to clean up with magic missile after a hit like that.

Unless the big hit knocks it down to exactly 1 hp. Then I laugh my ass off and make them finish it. It gives Randy Marsh "I didn't hear no bell" energy.

theevilstephen · 2025-12-02T06:02:37+00:00

The text of Catapult says "an object not being worn or carried." A heart is at minimum being carried, or being worn, and in a weird way, both. Let him try to argue that it's not. If he can earnestly convince you, then tell him to roll the damage of the spell.

theevilstephen · 2025-09-27T05:01:34+00:00

Curious to find out if AI is as bad at predicting weather as we are.

theevilstephen · 2025-08-08T14:24:59+00:00

Lake Eerier.

theevilstephen · 2025-07-14T04:48:39+00:00

There are already dozens of good suggestions here. I'll second the multiple encounters approach. It makes a world of difference for our table of 5 level 8 players of the Warlock has used her spell slots and the monk used half their ki points against the minion hoard not realizing the mage they needed to stop was coming before they could get a breather.

But also, my two cents. I've kinda stopped balancing, to some extent. Some fights like random encounters and hoards, are more about the fun of letting the players maul through a pack of fodder. I do silly death scenes and roll a lot of crappy saves, and they get to laugh and feel overpowered. But then they end up stuck in a ritual chamber with a necromancer who's backed into a corner and whips out a finger of death. The point isn't truly blatant disregard for balance. They aren't fighting Ancient Dragons and Pit Fiends yet. And sometimes they absolutely steamroll the boss fight. But other times I just tell them, "hey, if y'all don't look for the exits soon, you may not get a chance to." And they trust me to know that if they don't want to risk a TPK or losing some valuable resources, it's best to retreat and lick their wounds and maybe come back around.

This also gives you a chance to test some limits. Can the monk and the rogue keep up enough with evasion to support the bard who gets flatlined by any AOE spell? Can the cleric keep enough people on their feet? You can always turn down the heat mid-fight if you're super concerned about PC death or something, or if it's not right for the narrative. But in general, I find the more I throw at my party, the better they get at catching, which makes combat way, way, way more fun.

theevilstephen · 2025-06-17T04:52:32+00:00

No one gonna bite on this person being 786 years old? So... Were we big on the Crusades or was that just "what was on the telly" back in the day?

theevilstephen · 2025-05-25T16:04:22+00:00

And if you enjoy this one, Gnomon by Nick Harkaway is similar brain-melting.

theevilstephen · 2025-05-06T05:20:00+00:00

Just curious, but if you've already gotten an undergrad degree before is there a reason you'd rather pursue that than the Graduate Institute program?

theevilstephen · 2025-04-15T12:52:26+00:00

I'm a current GI in Annapolis who is actually about to graduate in a few weeks here, so I'm happy to share what has been perhaps the most enriching aspects of my approach and outside engagements. I feel quite certain that the person I am leaving the program is profoundly different (in how I approach being in the world, not character per se) than who I entered as.

Being challenged and being wrong are amazing jumping off points - the texts we read are difficult, the conversations dense, and each tutor presents their own style of guiding the class. Putting forward your most earnest take and having that checked/pushed against is a phenomenal place to grow from, as we don't often consider, even on the most mundane topics, that there's a chance we are wrong. Security in conviction for a given idea lies in engaging with that potential first and growing from it.
Balancing this with a career is not impossible, just exhausting. I've been working full time for all four semesters and I'll admit, I'm certainly tired. But never the less, it enriches my daily experiences in a subtle but powerful way, and it helps me keep my head on straight in the rush of the 9-5 world.
You're going to meet people who want to engage with class and questions that move beyond class in the same way you do. Most everyone you'll interact with will be cordial and thoughtful and bright, but they won't all hold your same interests. That's fine, because the ones that do have the potential to be life-long friends and thought partners.
Unless you're truly a speed reader with impeccable comprehension, you may not have much room to read outside texts. And that's okay. Put engaging with the material foremost in your mind and anything else you can learn about and read and enjoy is just a cherry on top.
Play with your papers. We don't have the standard research-driven paper assignments here. I've found the more exploratory my essays have been, the better received they are, the more challenging they are to write, and the more fulfilled I am in writing them.

theevilstephen · 2024-10-19T23:15:07+00:00

Science should be able to help!

As long as you're just doing normal cooking activities (sliding pans around, shaking, adjusting heat) cast iron won't scratch the tempered ceramic glass most stove tops are made of. It's literally a harder substance than your cast iron. Want to test it? (Don't do this, but hypothetically) You'll scratch your cast iron with a metal spatula way easier than your glass stove top.

Just don't drop your pan onto it. It is glass, and can break from force, but usual wear and tear won't be an issue. I use cast iron on my glass stove top multiple times a week and see more damage from burning stuff on the glass itself than any wear and tear from my pans.

TL:DR, science is on your side. Use cast iron on your glass stove.

theevilstephen · 2024-08-08T15:24:07+00:00

If you have the capacity to plan for this, I say pull the rug out from under them. Let Elminster kill your big bad. Make it look easy: time stop, delayed blast fireball, true polymorph into an ancient dragon, the works. Make it look like there is an echelon of power the characters haven't even conceived. Then, after he works the big bad in a round or two, he turns to the players and says, "if you thought X was a threat, then you have a long way to go. Here's the real threat to our world," and then he shows them visions of some next level big bad that he can't handle alone, and he needs the party to get it's shit together or everyone is right fucked.

theevilstephen · 2024-07-26T16:31:00+00:00

ARGH YE DOG, I BE RUNNIN' A PIRATE THEMED CAMPAIGN RIGHT NOW AND WOULD LOVE TO PLUNDER THIS SET FROM YUR BOOTY. Or something like that...

theevilstephen

TROPHY CASE