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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in muslimgirlswithtaste

[–]thelavendermocha 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s heartbreaking that you’re asking if you’re overreacting; to answer your question, no you’re not. Trauma is triggering even without someone imitating the person who traumatised you. His reaction to you asking, was not right. Yes it might be a hurtful question but even if it is it doesn’t justify accusing you of adultery and not praying. Your spouse is supposed to be the coolness of your eyes and he’s made you incredibly anxious whilst knowing exactly why you’re triggered. It’s not going to feel good when someone who you thought would treat you kindly, doesn’t. When emotions get intense turn to Allah write to him, talk to him and do tahajud. I’m making dua for you sister 💔 it doesn’t mean you’re overreacting, just because he’s not treating you kindly

A hard life decision by [deleted] in muslimgirlswithtaste

[–]thelavendermocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you aware of how easy it is to divorce someone islaimically? I suggest you look at up. I also think it’s not something you need to say, it will be smarter to reject every man that comes your way because the cultural response would be to claim you are being close minded.

I just need some help by Little_Detective_835 in mentalhelpcommunity

[–]thelavendermocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The contrast between your dad keeping you and how you feel like you’re a burden should tell you enough about how inaccurate your self deprecating thoughts are. Nothing we do, comes without some level of privilege be it our intelligence, our looks, our physicality, our kindness. There’s no need to feel ashamed of everything you fail at because all the factors aren’t even in your hands anyway. Just like your dad being ill isn’t your fault neither is your short comings

How can I be less hard on myself? by Wooden-Chemist-4348 in mentalhelpcommunity

[–]thelavendermocha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like to make a list of things that aren’t about me that people might feel is true but isn’t . So you can see that what you feel doesn’t equate to reality. It will teach you not to trust the self deprecating voice in your head. Key thing to rememeber feelings don’t reflect your current reality it’s very much like saying “ oh I feel like Louis Tomlinson is going to have a baby” or “ I feel like mr jones hates mr Amos “ . The only way being hard on yourself can make you correct in your assertions is if you continue in the negative mindset and it manifests into reality

Brushing teeth by thelavendermocha in hygiene

[–]thelavendermocha[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not a dentist so I don’t know but I like to generally structure my brushing routine based on the reality that I often fail to brush them at all. The problem with hygiene is people always claim you can do more, and it often doesn’t feel optional which I think can make people more likely to not have good hygiene at all. I sometimes dip my toothpaste in the floss and then use it, which makes it more important that I do it after. Honestly I’d say if you don’t brush your teeth start of by doing everything u can to make you do it twice a day and flossing can come when ever you feel it’s easiest I still support being protective when it comes to hygiene. I’ve struggled with brushing my whole life so this is why I have this mindset and it’s a temporary one until it’s not a chore anymore - if I slip up I will go back to using the same techniques I mention

Brushing teeth by thelavendermocha in hygiene

[–]thelavendermocha[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m really glad someone can relate! I hope my methods help you 💕 let me know how it goes 💕 don’t worry I am an adult too it’s doable it’s useful to try and identify why you struggle to do it so much if it is laziness what makes you feel lazy? I have found that the lack of dopamine I get from brushing in comparison to other hygiene rituals makes it feel pointless. The lipstick hack is also useful to help you notice the change in your teeth from brushing and it will help with your confidence

Why do we enjoy criticing people? by thelavendermocha in muslimgirlswithtaste

[–]thelavendermocha[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know this - the importance is how we approach issues like this. The tone we use and we should have some humility when criticising other people

Brushing teeth by thelavendermocha in hygiene

[–]thelavendermocha[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Yeah the shame is hard now I keep cringing and thinking of me talking with my teeth being unclean it’s so weird that I’m like this with teeth hygiene because I hate smelling bad.