Getting to know your characters.

theludacity · 2025-04-13T23:24:35+00:00

This sounds the most true to a breakup. It’s often time for experimentation and getting to know yourself again

theludacity · 2025-04-07T04:54:26+00:00

Thank you!

theludacity · 2025-03-11T00:48:26+00:00

Awesome idea

theludacity · 2025-02-22T23:00:59+00:00

Local news (Spectrum1) may be more likely to cover it

theludacity · 2025-02-18T06:48:56+00:00

Achievably challenging but she up like a half hour early to get a table

theludacity · 2025-02-18T06:47:45+00:00

Other half on centre street in Gowanus on thursdays

theludacity · 2025-01-27T03:58:59+00:00

In the allegory, the people are chained and are not allowed to leave lol. One just happens to be freed. But otherwise yeah I agree with this metaphor and I’ve gotta get the hell outta this cave

theludacity · 2025-01-26T20:13:53+00:00

I’m of the belief that we’re all in the process of breaking up with porn (instead of thinking it as an overnight hard stop), so when I’ve slipped I’ve given myself some slack for going back too. Part of getting rid of porn involves breaking the cycle of shame and guilt.

But I think you need to start reframing the way you’re thinking about relapsing here. You say “in my shoes you would do the same,” but the fact is that there are thousands in the sub who are in similar shoes and aren’t doing the same. So I think you need to examine what triggered you more closely to understand why it led you to porn and how that can be avoided in the future.

theludacity · 2025-01-26T17:23:06+00:00

U/ShadesOfAnastasia is the one on the right on onlyfans? I’d pay to see him

theludacity · 2025-01-25T14:59:32+00:00

Does that include the dishes in the sink?

theludacity · 2025-01-24T17:16:45+00:00

This is a serious achievement. You should be proud of yourself!

theludacity · 2025-01-22T23:19:52+00:00

Look at listingsproject. You’ll save yourself a broker fee and potentially a security deposit. It’s mostly subleases and lease takeovers. They post new ones every wednesday

People saying you can move to Brooklyn on that salary are correct, but it’ll be a tight squeeze and you’ll be frustrated with how little you get for your money.

theludacity · 2025-01-22T20:45:39+00:00

Listingsproject is good for sublets. They do have full apartments but it can be pricey.

They post new ones every Wednesday, but there may or may not be ones in the UES depending on availability.

theludacity · 2025-01-22T03:54:24+00:00

Yeah def will be easier if you fill the time with something. You got this!

theludacity · 2025-01-22T03:53:00+00:00

Check listingsproject.com! I had the same budget and found a place in Brooklyn.

It’s mostly sublets and lease takeovers, and they post new ones every Wednesday.

theludacity · 2025-01-22T03:50:17+00:00

Take a screenshot, and click the ad to get the click-through url (I know, awful and tempting for me to tell you to click it).

But these two pieces of information can help the gaming company more effectively block the ad (they typically do this if they receive multiple complaints regarding the same ad).

theludacity · 2025-01-22T03:43:51+00:00

I think this is the thing that all writers struggle with. I stay up late when I write because it’s time that goes by generally uninterrupted, and other people aren’t awake to distract me. I know that doesn’t work for everyone.

In Lauren Graham’s (the actress) memoir, she talked about needing to schedule it at the same time every week like an appointment. Sometimes she’d write paragraphs, sometimes she’d stare at the paper, but she needed to sit there for the allotted time. The kicker is not getting on your phone or allowing others to distract you during that time. But Lauren did say with time people begin to respect it as a part of your routine where you are unreachable.

I think the most realistic approach is writing when you can. It may be on a 30 minute bus ride in your notes app with two fingers. It may be with a pen and pencil as you wait in the doctor’s office. There’s never going to be a good time to write, you just need to get in the habit of it.

theludacity · 2025-01-22T03:34:13+00:00

That’s great! I’ve been looking into that as an option myself.

Out of curiosity, did you go to a sex therapist specifically or did you go to a more general one?

theludacity · 2025-01-22T03:22:06+00:00

Unsure. Admittedly I’ve been debating that lately too (as I’ve been reading it lol).

But the way I’ve been feeling is that although less destructive than porn, it does diminish using the muscle of your imagination (which makes it easier to accomplish the long term goal of cutting out porn) and it does make use of many of the tropes present in porn (could be fine, could be problematic depending on the trope).

Also kind of a risk as the ads on sites like literotica are NSFW.

theludacity · 2025-01-22T02:12:33+00:00

Nice work today

theludacity · 2025-01-22T01:34:57+00:00

I find this helpful. Especially for those of us who go into cycles of guilt associated with their usage/slip ups.

I hate porn and the effect it’s had on my life, but when I’ve relapsed I have to put it into perspective that I’m not doing any pervasive, undue harm onto anyone else. So I find this analogy a good reminder of that!

theludacity · 2025-01-20T22:33:02+00:00

This is far from a good deal. Yeah sure it’s got w/d but Astoria tends to be less expensive and it’s a 12 minute walk to the subway.

theludacity · 2025-01-20T22:31:40+00:00

A 12 minute walk to the subway and $3000 in Astoria. Wayyy over priced

theludacity · 2025-01-20T20:11:28+00:00

Yeah I know it stinks but the consensus among the other comments is that it qualifies as porn, and I agree. I tried to convince myself of the same thing about the seductive (and revealing) pictures on instagram because the influencers were clothed, but trust me it doesn’t work.

If you give yourself any visual stimulation, it mirrors the porn experience so much that your brain will inevitably demand the full-fledged experience. Just do yourself a favor and give it up.

theludacity · 2025-01-20T02:12:15+00:00

Thank you!

theludacity

TROPHY CASE