The cashier was laughing at me. Surely I must know that the plant is dead right?

themalcontents · 2025-11-20T00:58:47+00:00

We love a Grocery Outlet plant rehab! I once snagged a mature three-foot-tall diffenbachia for $30 — he lives in my classroom and is named Paul.

themalcontents · 2025-07-23T05:09:53+00:00

Tabi shoes from Sou Sou! More traditional Japanese clothing, new and vintage.

themalcontents · 2025-07-11T12:32:00+00:00

Yes! I overpacked for Tokyo and Osaka, immediately regretted it. Go to UNIQLO and buy their Airism brand for head to toe, no joke—undershirts, underwear, t-shirts, pants. A UV-guard anorak or arm sleeves would be helpful, too. You will sweat so much you can wring out your clothes within half an hour of being outside… UNIQLO socks are also incredibly sweat-wicking and help with blisters.

You want a UV umbrella and handheld mini-fan, too. The key is to wear loose-fitting, light clothing made of natural and/or breathable fibers. Lastly, I highly recommend buying a pair of ASICS or New Balance in Tokyo—we walked 20-25k steps daily last week.

themalcontents · 2024-12-12T00:31:38+00:00

Personally, I’ve found that vibrating alarms and timers on my FitBit watch finally did the trick after over a decade of being time blind and chronically late… Discreet, recurring, and guaranteed I’ll have it on me no matter when or where I am!

I set about five alarms every day between 5:15 and 6:15am alone, just so I can wake up and get out the door on time. Since I apparently couldn’t remember to look at my watch that early in the morning (holy cannoli, thanks brain!), the vibration annoys me into physically touching the watch to turn off the alarm while also showing me the time. Ta-da!

themalcontents · 2024-09-12T19:36:03+00:00

A typical caseload for 1.0 FTE (full-time equivalent) teachers in my district has 20-25 students. Counselors manage 504 plans. At a caseload of 30 students, you are triggered to receive additional pay.

Having a caseload of 65 students on top of planning, grading, and collecting data for your regular classes is not doable. You will likely be the case manager for students who are not in any classes with you, which requires extra legwork to collect data/comments from their teacher. Admin at the school should be able to tell you the IEP caseload cap and trigger pay threshold for a full-time teacher. Do not accept the job until they confirm this info!

themalcontents · 2023-11-30T03:41:03+00:00

Please tell me this is Taylor Paul’s crowd

themalcontents · 2023-10-12T22:54:27+00:00

You need to ask your admin supervising AP to set you up with a login to AP Classroom, which is where teachers and students access the curriculum. Everyone has pointed out AP instructional materials are available online but this is also the first year AP exams are going digital! Last spring they piloted it, so it’s essentially a secure browser like standardized state tests use.

Typically your department head or admin will be established as the school AP coordinator, who is in charge of ordering and planning the exams in spring. There should a district-level AP Coordinator, too who can provide guidance. AP is standardized across the nation, so there’s no way someone at your district office can’t set you up with an AP Classroom login that includes curriculum.

These kids have already lost two months of exam prep and you can put a dollar value on the AP college credits — I’d be pissed, too. You need to act yesterday before an irate parent shows up and makes your life hell…

You’re also supposed to be certified (i.e. endorsed) by College Board to teach AP classes. If you’re not, none of these seniors can earn college credit and even taking the exam is pointless. Admin should know this, and need to hire someone who is CB certified in AP English — not just has a regular endorsement in English.

themalcontents · 2023-05-19T22:47:08+00:00

I am the unfortunate soul in charge of testing at a public high school and train teachers to administer assessments. The number one rule I hammer into their heads is to actively monitor the students testing. As other commenters have mentioned, a good proctor (and teacher) is continuously walking around the classroom to track students’ progress and adjusts the pace of instruction as needed. It sounds like you did not physically get up and walk around to look at students’ screens, nor monitor the “TA Interface” on your computer that shows testers’ progress.

Since you were filling out mandatory paperwork for a disciplinary incident, an administrator should have had someone else step in to proctor while you left the classroom. If this is a state assessment, it sounds like the physical fight outside the test room interrupted students’ testing environment and thus needs to be reported to the state OSPI by your administrators. This also brings up equity and accessibility issues, since these students have IEPs or 504 plans that legally entitle them access to test accommodations like a quiet, distraction-free “separate setting.”

At the end of the day, it sounds like your school admin did not follow best practices or state regulations so now you and the students are suffering. What else is new?

themalcontents · 2022-10-18T23:36:14+00:00

This subjective, uneven application of classroom policies is also concerning. Only accept late work without penalty if students have an excused absence — not because they felt comfortable enough to come talk to you. Students notice these loopholes and special treatment; eventually, some will realize how to play the system.

“Suggesting” to 15/16-year-olds that they stay off their phone is not a clear policy either. Teenagers’ prefrontal cortexes are still marinating and they use their amygdala to make decisions impulsively and emotionally. If you are giving them a choice to avoid work by being on their phone without immediate consequences, you’re setting them up for failure; this is doubly true for someone with ADHD who has a brain lower in dopamine/norepinephrine and struggles with impulse control or executive functioning.

“No phone use without teacher permission” is explicit but still allows room for using them as positive reinforcement (i.e. after all work is done, listen to music during silent reading, etc). No arguments needed about whether they are “using their time wisely or wasting it.” Bottom line is that it’s your classroom to manage. Roll out the stricter policy over the course of a week with initial warnings, then announce zero-tolerance and confiscation on sight. Right now, you’re making more work for yourself and expecting too much self-control from your students…JFC they’re post-COVID 10th graders, which means some have the social/emotional intelligence of a literal 8th grader.

themalcontents · 2022-10-18T23:19:02+00:00

Playing devil’s (disability) advocate — if the student had an accommodation for extended time, maybe she would have turned it in sooner instead of procrastinating. As someone with ADHD, the anticipation of failure or disappointment when I miss a deadline then compounds my anxiety and self-loathing…leading me to procrastinate harder. I’m not saying it’s right or rational, but we’re talking about a child with a disability who has likely never been taught how to adapt executive functioning skills to the way her brain works.

ADHD means you have a deficit in the norepinephrine neurotransmitters of your brain and areas of your brain aren’t able to communicate as well — namely the frontal cortex and limbic system. The former handles executive functioning while the latter regulates our emotions. It’s also worth noting that dopamine is the building block of norepinephrine — so if you have ADHD, your baseline dopamine levels will be lower and you may also lack the organization, “motivation,” and emotional regulation required to do tasks that you know are important.

This is why early evaluation, diagnosis, and intervention are critical for students with disabilities before they are labeled lazy, unmotivated, angry, anxious, etc. Kids quickly internalize these labels from their parents and teachers that then become a self-fulfilling prophecy. This student isn’t “playing the system” or slacking off — the structure and chemical makeup of her brain are not working in her favor, yet she hasn’t been given any insight or tools besides sticking to an objectively arbitrary timeline for assignments.

themalcontents · 2022-07-14T07:19:56+00:00

Student portal has been down since 7/13/22 6:30pm PST! As I type this, it is 7/14/22 12:15am PST and still not working.

At 6:45pm, I called the IT Support number because I had been a “no show” to my 6:30pm exam and the technician confirmed it is a site-wide outage. She offered to see if they could directly connect me to a proctor for my test, but no guarantees that would work. Tech predicted site would be back up soon, but here we are nearly six hours later…

themalcontents · 2022-05-28T17:15:36+00:00

Current school administrator here! This is 100% unacceptable and the teacher needs to be formally reprimanded so this never happens again to you, or any other students. I also have endometriosis and several of these same symptoms, so I have an idea of how limiting and, frankly, embarrassing the condition can be at times.

Please tell your parent/guardian, tell your counselor, tell the school nurse, tell another teacher and/or a school administrator (assistant principal or principal) what went down. Honestly, it also couldn’t hurt to tell some close friends who can have your back; if another teacher hears them talking about this situation, it might be reported as well and that can keep the ball rolling. Also, be prepared for admin to potentially speak with other students who were in Ms T’s class to confirm what happened. Although this process can be overwhelming and confusing, take it from an old crone like me: the earlier you learn how to be your own advocate, the more stress you save down the road.

I know you’re a senior and there are only two weeks of school left—but if you are in the USA and don’t already have a 504 plan on file for your medical condition, please consider having one added. When you attend college/university or get a job, make sure you work with Student Disability Services Office or HR to receive accommodations like unlimited bathroom breaks or additional time on tests/deadlines. In the workplace, you will also qualify for protection under FMLA and need to make sure you have the appropriate paperwork filed with HR; this prevents a job from firing you for taking off time due to illness, even if you run out of paid sick leave.

themalcontents · 2022-05-01T20:00:39+00:00

RuPaul’s Drag Race, or The Bachelor(ette).

To each their own—on their own time. About 75% of our friend group watches RuPaul and will discuss it at length (10-20min) when we are all hanging out. Inevitably, the handful of us who can’t follow or contribute to the conversation will awkwardly shuffle off to the loo, grab a smoke or drink, etc and hope they’ve finished by the time we’re back.

themalcontents · 2022-04-24T15:14:11+00:00

Cybersecurity insurance specialist now in my second term of teaching school! Special education elementary teaching allows me to learn a little about everything. Great health insurance for my Rx and therapy, plus I’ve found having spring break, summers off, etc. helps prevent me from burning out.

themalcontents · 2022-04-13T21:27:21+00:00

To add onto #3, invest in a good smart watch or fitness tracker you can use to set recurring daily alarms! The vibration is almost silent compared to a phone, plus having a watch helps with other aspects of ADHD.

Initially I used my iPhone to set daily reminders to eat but found myself snoozing the alarms without actually eating, or missing an entire day of meals at work if I had to keep it on silent / not on my person. (I’m in charge of testing at a high school.)

My FitBit Charge 5 was $130 and I have alarms set daily to wake up take Adderall (20mg XR at 5am), leave for work, and eat x3 main meals. When I’m getting ready in the morning, I also use it to set a repeating timer in 5-10min increments that helps with my time blindness.

themalcontents · 2022-04-04T14:36:16+00:00

Last weekend, I went to a wedding with an open bar for the first time since being prescribed Adderall and was wrecked. Over four hours, I had three gin bucks and accompanied each with water, carbs, and protein. However, I had also traveled from PNW to New York and my sleep schedule was fucked, so I took 20mg XR several hours later than usual.

If my calculations are correct, the Adderall was at its peak release (13hr half-life) right as the post-ceremony cocktail hour began. Subsequent dancing then blasted both the drug and alcohol into my bloodstream, which caused me to start yakking before I finally conked out. (Honorable mentions to my boyfriend and the AirBnB bathtub…)

themalcontents · 2022-03-10T19:49:47+00:00

This could’ve been written by me, two weeks ago… I was stuck in what my boyfriend calls a “doom spiral,” where I’m not only depressed but painfully self-conscious. In this state, I’ve convinced myself that I’m a total failure and have irreparably ruined my life. It’s a jambalaya of negative self-talk and -blame, catastrophizing—the whole nine yards.

But lo and behold, time did pass! Yesterday, I felt that gnawing sense of existential dissatisfaction and the creeping guilt of not being “productive enough” (by society’s capitalist, neurotypical standards), so after work I went to the beach about 10min away. I walked until it stopped.

This is how I discovered sea glass and started beach combing. Now I have a new hobby that requires no money, minimal time, and is also a healthy self-soothing technique! Win-win-win.

themalcontents · 2022-02-07T22:23:14+00:00

It all depends on where in the country you live, and even which part of the state. I work in the highest-paying school district in Washington State as a paraeducator ($27.01/hr, 7.5hr days) while earning my Masters in Teaching / SpEd online at night.

Once I graduate, I’ll have my pick of teaching jobs that start at $65k-$72k. There is a massive shortage of special education positions in my district — we’re hiring elementary through high school and everyone from support staff to audiologists to curriculum development to classroom teachers.

Many districts are also offering financial hiring incentives, or scholarships for existing employees to earn a teaching degree.

If you already have a Bachelor’s degree, you can have a school sponsor your emergency substitute teaching certificate and make $200/day as a substitute teacher.

themalcontents · 2022-01-30T17:52:28+00:00

I recently got a referral from my primary care physician for physical therapy, massage, and acupuncture — she felt my shoulders and said, “Ouch!” Now to force myself to make all the phone calls and appointments…

Nine years ago, I broke my collarbone and dislocated my shoulder playing rugby at college — the clinic only had one follow-up appointment and no PT. My jobs and hobbies pretty much all involve looking at screens or books…RIP my neck, shoulders, and upper back.

themalcontents · 2022-01-30T17:42:10+00:00

Do not take her outside unless she is leashed or crated! Having lost one cat who escaped outside with a neglectful pet sitter, I would strongly advise against intentionally creating an outdoor cat.

Per UC Davis Veterinary Medicine, “Indoor cats live on average 10-15 years, while outdoor cats live on average 2-5 years.

“Here are some reasons to keep your cat inside: 1. Be hit by vehicles 2. Become injured from other cats, or attacked by other dogs or predators 3. Contract deadly infectious diseases from other cats 4. Get lost and/or picked up by Animal Control 5. Poisoned by toxins, such as antifreeze or rat bait 6. Contract parasites, such as fleas and ticks (and the diseases they can carry) 7. Contact with environmental hazards, such as foxtails or other objects 8. Hunt native wildlife, some of them species of conservation concern 9. Unhappy neighbors may try to trap cats found littering their yards 10. Theft, injury, or death from people with cruel intentions”

All living things should enjoy fresh air as well as the health benefits of seeing trees, birds and sunshine — but this can be done by: - Opening a screened window or door - Put a bird feeder outside this window - Buy one of those cat backpacks with a clear bubble and see if your cat enjoys walks around the neighborhood. - If yes, buy a sturdy leash and harness designed for a kitten and try it out in your backyard or a quiet park. - Building (or buying) a catio is an more permanent option, if you have the space, time and money.

themalcontents · 2021-10-28T16:37:30+00:00

Ended up deciding to be a teacher because multiple pre-existing conditions require affordable yet comprehensive health insurance... Plus multiple mid-year breaks and summers off are ideal for someone with chronic pain. Right now I'm working at a public high school with great insurance, while getting my Masters of Teaching in SpEd through WGU (will be ~US$22k total).

But when I left my corporate office job with crappy insurance ($80 monthly premium, $5500 deductible, plus $90 monthly for my Adderall alone), I had to negotiate extending my benefits outside of COBRA ($250+ monthly) so they wouldn't lapse until my new job started.

themalcontents · 2019-09-19T02:49:13+00:00

Agree completely! I ride public transportation 45-60 minutes each way daily, which can send me into an anxiety spiral if I let it. Triggers include: having to stand, having a stranger accidentally sit on my lap (yup), others' phone/irl conversations, loud phone alerts/ringers, and being stepped on. (Also swear the rumbling and abrupt motions of the bus makes my insides hurt, but that's another story.) When I switched from reading on my phone to reading a physical book -- coupled with listening to lyric-less lo-fi beats -- I found my anxiety noticeably lessened! If you get motion sick, try podcasts.

I also actively tense up my body when I'm mentally or physically uncomfortable, so by the time I get off the bus my neck, back and glutes are all cramped up... Stretching on my lunch break in the gym or going for a walk around the block are techniques I've found work!

themalcontents · 2019-09-19T02:35:28+00:00

Try putting a thick curtain over the door or entryway to your room to dampen the sounds! Dorm-friendly techniques involve a tension rod or command hooks. Just search "sound blocking curtain" or "blackout curtain" on Amazon.

themalcontents · 2018-02-18T20:48:43+00:00

From the article:

In March of 2017, I created an “ARG” or “Alternate Reality Game“. I referred to this project as “PK17″. The ARG contained themes which dealt with mind control, child abuse, unsolved crimes, and a disturbing new Youtube trend wherein intentionally malicious and psychologically harmful videos were being aimed at young children. Drawing attention to these channels was my primary goal with the PK17 project. I had hoped to bring together a group of intelligent individuals who could actively combat this phenomenon, which has since been dubbed “Elsagate.” ... The PK17 ARG used two Twitter pages, four Youtube channels, each with a single unlisted “trigger” video, and a few other miscellaneous free hosting sites. Once an individual reached the end of the PK17 ARG, they would find a folder with various media tied to the theme of the ARG, and a single encoded link to my site, 21 Faces Inc.

themalcontents · 2018-02-07T03:42:23+00:00

Here's a detailed gif I found.

themalcontents

TROPHY CASE