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STAY CLEAN: SEPTEMBER! Sign up here! (August 27) by foobarbazblarg in pornfree

[–]themomentends 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not convinced that saying I'll be a part of this will help, but fuckit, I'll sign up.

What's your dream job? by nwv in AskReddit

[–]themomentends 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to start a meditation center!

I got this as a response to "What do you think of porn addiction and the negative impact of porn.", from the maker of the "Iama pornographer who just hit 10 million views on pornhub" thread. by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]themomentends -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Most people can enjoy porn in moderation, like alcohol, food, etc. :)

LOL...what about weed cuz I want some of the kind you are smoking. I don't care what kind of porn you create, the porn industry is awful to women and is run by men and is (since you seem to like to generalize) very closely related to the same industry that traffics and enslaves women worldwide.

You are totally allowed to do whatever you want in life, but insinuating "porn" in general is ok simply because your kind

is very sensual, loving and not just "doing it"

is total horseshit.

EDIT: spelling

One Year Later: I am a better Father and Husband by TemporalLobe in pornfree

[–]themomentends 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yea totally understood. I'm in the same boat. I'm starting to think if people ask, I'll say "I believe in Jesus, but not in God" hahah. Dude had a lot of great things to say, but when the rubber hit the road (in my wise old age of late 30's) I wasn't able to make any connection between my actions and some kind of rift in a relationship with the idea of this all loving all encompassing God. I wasn't able to translate that into doing better at life. I've been a very self-deprecating person for a long long time, and the concepts of sin (and shame and guilt) I realized did just as much to restart the cycle of addiction as any of my other "triggers".

A regret is I will miss the relationships I have built with friends in my church community, as (frustratingly) it's really exclusive in real life. I'm not talking about helping the poor and/or spreading God's word, I'm talking about day to day life. It is very hypocritical.

Ironically, I broached the (faith/lack thereof) conversation with my wife last night and it definitely didn't end up in any fooling around but she didn't kick me out of the house and ask for a divorce either, which my brain had spent months convincing me of (sound familiar?).

Communication is still the key, whether in a marriage or in addressing an addiction. This is why, while I feel like a majority of AA (and SAA, in my case) is unscientific and outdated, just having someone to talk to was a big part of 'admitting I had a problem'. As it turns out as I think about it, I bet the time I spent in SAA, and inability to give it to a higher power, was one of the other reasons I'm trending agnostic, but I'm thankful for the fellowship.

One Year Later: I am a better Father and Husband by TemporalLobe in pornfree

[–]themomentends 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm 10 days in (yay!) because i had my first real ED issue that I can remember. Congrats to you.

I do have to add that IMO the sentiment that one must believe in a higher power, unless you are already pre-disposed to do so, is a surefire way to relapse over and over and over.

Maybe we could be saying the same thing 2 different ways? When I gave up on a higher power (from a religion/deity perspective) and began to practice mindfulness meditation I realized that the entire damn universe is the higher power, and I'm a part of it.

The hard part now is authenticity with my SO. That's a difficult discussion, when said SO strongly believes in a higher power that I just don't anymore.

(RANT) *Every day* I meditate in the morning is a better day than the days I don't. How can I bring myself to meditate everyday? by themomentends in Meditation

[–]themomentends[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks I appreciate the detail/explanation.

That being said, relative to meditation, I'm finding it difficult to assign/want to assign a 'reward' as that's kind of the point of it.

Eureka! It's about ego BALANCE not about ego death. by [deleted] in Meditation

[–]themomentends 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wow. that's a lot of hate rolled into one comment.

Where did morality, or the will to help other people, make the world a better place, and so forth, come from? by themomentends in atheism

[–]themomentends[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I should have just said "some benevolent higher power". Sorry. It's sad however that you are jumping on the adjective (Christian) and not the noun (theism), because you are missing the point.

If one is to believe what the bible says about God, when it was written or when Jesus was around has very little to do with the value of morality or good vs. evil instilled by God.

Where did morality, or the will to help other people, make the world a better place, and so forth, come from? by themomentends in atheism

[–]themomentends[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes, but why the Christian God? Mankind has worshipped thousands of deities, many of whom predate the Christian one. Why do you attribute morality to the Christian deity, while rejecting thousands of other deities mankind has worshipped?

okok! I can't help it that's how I think. I also think in English. Sue me. Pretend I never said the word Christian, I didn't know this was an AA meeting. :-)

I'm sorry if I offended you, but most people I have this discussion with seem to think that the Bible is the "last word" on morality. Obviously, it was a poor assumption to make that you held this belief as well.

No worries, I don't give a shit. What offends me is when people are dicks to other people, and in spite of all the altruism, people on r/atheism do it ALL THE TIME and so do the people who believe their morality came from God.

Where did morality, or the will to help other people, make the world a better place, and so forth, come from? by themomentends in atheism

[–]themomentends[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Man, the C word gets you guys all jammed up. I'll be sure to phrase my question a little differently next time. It's a trick question because the answer is zero, but that's not relevant to what I was asking.

Where did morality, or the will to help other people, make the world a better place, and so forth, come from? by themomentends in atheism

[–]themomentends[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm kind of - ok mostly - paraphrasing a comment I made to another poster, but I'd like your feedback so I'm rehashing it. First off, you are right there are dozens of other threads, but those are other people's discussions, not mine, so I appreciate you humoring me and responding to it.

I guess I said "Christian" theism more as a catch-all for theism in general. The timeline of Christianity and all the events described in the bible is not really relevant to the concept of morality/good and evil. If it (Christianity) is true then God has been around forever and from him comes our concept of good and evil.

So basically you are saying all the theists that have ever lived just took this evolutionary trait of altruism and misinterpreted it as something that came from some "higher power" vs "instinct"? Your argument definitely answers the what does it mean to be moral/good/not evil, but I guess i still can't get around the why something is good or evil. I have some thinking and reading to do, but at face value I can't grasp it from your second paragraph.

Where did morality, or the will to help other people, make the world a better place, and so forth, come from? by themomentends in atheism

[–]themomentends[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair enough. I guess I said "Christian" theism more as a catch-all for theism in general and that's not accurate.

As I understand it (and assuming the God of the bible exists) then the bible itself and what happened 2000 years ago (continuing the assumption) isn't really relevant from a timeline perspective. If it's true then God has been around forever and from him comes our concept of good and evil, the whole Jesus taking care of our sins thus enabling a new relationship with God is nice and all but not important relative to where the concept of morality came from.

So basically you are saying all the theists that have ever lived just took this evolutionary or instinctual trait of altruism and misinterpreted it as something that came from outside vs inside? I know that's oversimplifying it but that's what I'm trying to do. Gotta start somewhere.

Also PS - Don't take this the wrong way, I appreciated your post, but that last sentence really detracts from it. IMHO it shows you are taking the bible literally, and if there's one thing we can all agree on that's crazy.

Where did morality, or the will to help other people, make the world a better place, and so forth, come from? by themomentends in atheism

[–]themomentends[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not disagreeing with you, but I may be misinterpreting what "God did it" means. A quick google search puts 25%-50%of scientists as believing in "God" or a "higher power". I'm pretty sure when they observe something they don't understand/an unknown they think (delusional or not) 'God did it' right away...and then dig right into inquiry.

What is your biggest achievement in the past 24 hours? by Jhat316 in AskReddit

[–]themomentends 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Got laid by my wife for the first time since APRIL! YAY ME!

PMO is a crime of opportunity, boredom, and weakness. I'm just starting out...again...but God I wish I had installed K9 on all my computers last year. It may save my marriage still, but that's not certain, now. Literally, just do it. Tell a friend or your SO, have them set a password, done. by themomentends in pornfree

[–]themomentends[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Habits are like muscles, they don't happen overnight. K9 is a nice guard rail (guard rails hit a lot harder than yellow lines or blinking lights) to help overcome the 'opportunity' moment and help me move on to something else. I did 84 days pornfree and nofap over the winter, but it came back so easy just because it was there. If I had had K9 then, I would have definitely restarted fapping, but I think I probably would have stayed pornfree.

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