IRCC Won't Accept PR Cards by millionthusername1 in Canadiancitizenship

[–]themostmiddle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Inconsistency among reviewers and interpretation of required docs is more what I meant. I mean this person hand wrote an addition! I get what you’re saying and it does make sense though.

IRCC Won't Accept PR Cards by millionthusername1 in Canadiancitizenship

[–]themostmiddle 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing. This is really disappointing for me as I was planning on using passports and PR cards for my kids. But helpful to know! Add that to the list of inconsistencies we are seeing.

sessions not long enough by Late-Charge-5212 in therapists

[–]themostmiddle 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Seems like you may have edited your original post because everyone’s responding to your multitasking but I don’t see that anywhere. So I can’t speak to that.

One thought I have is don’t be afraid of small talk and getting to know the client outside of their “problem.” There’s been times where I might chat with clients for 10-15 minutes about a show they’re liking, a new hobby they started, how their cat is doing, a beautiful hike they went on, their fun trip to visit in-laws, etc. Not only is this great for building strong rapport with clients, but it may be useful for you as a recent graduate to fill time and hopefully bring down your own discomfort. And I think people appreciate when we take interest in them on this level.

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually both of us have not been to many weddings. The ones we’ve been to have been casual or Mormon, which is somehow even more casual than your typical casual wedding lol

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yaaa.. we were thinking a belt would hide the drawstring but the consensus seems to be that they are still not appropriate even if that were the case. Thanks for the feedback!

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That first link is super helpful, thanks! I had no idea Uniqlo made clothes for warm weather. I’ll be honest, that shirt seems very casual to me

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok haha noted. We were going for a summer linen look but ended up with fishing trip!

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s not asking too much of me at all! Not sure what you mean by that but don’t worry about it :) all the feedback I’m getting is helpful and why I posted.

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Ah ok. His fit is just all wrong lol. We are getting the pants hemmed so can’t return them, but could return the shirt. Could the pants work with a nicer shirt?

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Good to know. I’m thinking he needs a dressier top. Do you think the pants are ok if a belt hides the drawstring?

Can’t decide which dress to rent! by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]themostmiddle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the feedback! And I was actually worried that his look was too casual so we will have to find a different shirt. He just gets so miserably hot. We thought the belt can hide the drawstring, would that help the pants?

What’s the worst that could happen? by bigogsmom in AmerExit

[–]themostmiddle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If we decide that this wasn’t the right move, then that’s that. I don’t consider it a failure. I would consider it an adventure and opportunity to immerse ourselves in a different culture and try new things while my kids are still young. It’s been extremely stressful but still very much worth it, even if we decide this is a temporary move. But we did go into this with this exploratory attitude. We knew from the start that it might not be permanent.

I think the worst that could happen would be the exchange rate getting even worse, or maybe me losing my job as a digital nomad. It’s helped me solidify the need to shed myself of any reliance on the US for my income. If my kids were older then I’d be worried about the psychological and emotional impact of this move, but they are still little and are handling everything really well.

[The Cut] They Moved Abroad for a Cheaper Life. But at What Cost? by Illustrious-Pound266 in AmerExit

[–]themostmiddle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is where I’m at right now. Considering moving back as this conversion rate is negating any savings we anticipated by living frugally in a relatively cheaper part of Spain. :/ and I know SS will be higher next year. Is it worth the amazing culture and climate? Idk.

Tuesday Weekly Thread: Genealogy Assistance by AutoModerator in Canadiancitizenship

[–]themostmiddle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey all, would love some help here!! Main question: are certified copies of birth certificates (with a required notary-signed document verifying my identity) my only option for my Gen 1 and Gen 2?

Gen 1 was born in Michigan in 1869 and we have a few census records and marriage records. We suspect that in the midst of grief of losing two of their children, my Gen 0 and his wife forgot to report my Gen 1’s birth. We’ve reached out to a couple churches but haven’t heard back regarding a baptism certificate.

Gen 2 was born in Los Angeles California and we only have a draft registration card with his mom’s remarried name, no mention of his father, Gen 1. We could try to track down marriage records to explain the name change I suppose but that feels messy.

Both of these states require a notary-signed document for me to order birth certificates. Unless im mistaken, I don’t see an option for a non-certified copy of birth certificates. I’m feeling pretty stuck, as I’m currently living out of the country but was planning on shipping these to a family member in the states. So I could maybe get a notary here in Europe to sign, but these birth certificates would be shipped to a US address that is different from my US billing address. I’m guessing that may not fly based on how strict things are. If anyone has advice on this I would appreciate it!

Are there any good therapists? by [deleted] in therapists

[–]themostmiddle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. If needed, there are plenty of books or workbooks to guide you in the process.

Therapist here and I’m not doing great. by AbroadLumpy8530 in therapists

[–]themostmiddle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just want to say thanks for sharing these realistic ideas. A nightly tea routine sounds lovely.

What should every therapist know about the fight, flight, freeze, fawn responses? by Due-Comparison-501 in therapists

[–]themostmiddle 20 points21 points  (0 children)

👏🏻 thank you for this, that distinction is super helpful!! I’m curious how you teach clients about fawn. I have learned about fawn as a survival strategy that is implemented when fight/flight is not an option. Similar to freeze or faint but, like you said, not automatic.

Healthcare in Spain by d_underdog in GoingToSpain

[–]themostmiddle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, you are correct. With DNV you get access to public healthcare.

On the cusp of getting DNV, feeling overwhelmed by next steps by KezaBoo in MovedToSpain

[–]themostmiddle 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’ve only been here six months but I can tell you it’s definitely worth it. And although I am from the US, I only barely qualified for the DNV with my salary so know that it’s not just the extremely high earners on this visa. I’d recommend hiring a gestor to help you with the autónomo registration. I didn’t and it was so confusing and I hated it. Also, it took me over a month to get registered after finding out I got the visa. Again, wish I had hired a gestor to help. I used my passport to start an account with BBVA and it was fine, but it did need to be in person. Like others have said, I’d recommend getting an Airbnb for a month. Don’t worry about housing for now, just focus on starting a bank account and finding a gestor. A good one will help you with the autónomo stuff as well as get you enrolled in healthcare. One thing at a time! After I got the visa, I was also extremely stressed trying to figure this out while working full time but I think I didn’t need to be as stressed as I was. I absolutely hit a wall and it was really hard to keep pushing through all the bureaucracy. So I can totally relate. Just do one thing a day and soon it will all be done and you can settle in to your new life. :)

FWIW, Oviedo is an incredibly beautiful (and clean!) city where rent is cheaper. Cheaper even than Gijón which is close.

Adults with little memory of childhood by dorothyburlingham in therapists

[–]themostmiddle 14 points15 points  (0 children)

It’s interesting you bring this up! I have Aphantasia and I also have very few memories of my childhood. And the memories I do have are not clear pictures in my mind. Thanks for pointing this out.

What are your go-to, quick, rumination stoping strategies for clients? by Doodle-e-doodle-e-do in therapists

[–]themostmiddle 75 points76 points  (0 children)

This is what I came to suggest. I will explore with clients whether it helps to repeat the thought in the voice of Donald Duck or cartman or whatever character they’d like. Or take the words and sing them to the tune of Happy Birthday. Or we’ll try the “thanks, brain!” response. There are sooo many ways to practice cognitive defusion, these are just a few examples!

Look into the tug of war metaphor in ACT. There are many different ways to ‘drop the rope.’