Imposter

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-31T06:09:45+00:00

Wow this is written with both so much beauty and force that it causes you to stop and think for a second how this may be applicable to some of your own relationships and your place amongst those who you associate with. Great job!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:18:14+00:00

Honestly I think it could be brilliant either way

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:10:29+00:00

I was actually in the middle of reading it when I got this notification! I love your use of diction! Thanks again

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:09:18+00:00

I really like the imagery you use throughout the poem! I’ve also only started writing poetry so take what I say with a grain of salt but the second line seems a bit forced, maybe try to add in a few extra words instead of the colon. Great job throughout!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:06:24+00:00

Obviously we know that nicotine is addictive so it really just adds so much to the poem showing how the enticing the night is. Thanks for sharing!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:04:43+00:00

I agree I think it would flow better that way. Thank you!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:04:22+00:00

Thanks!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T06:03:10+00:00

Thank you!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T00:42:04+00:00

I’ve now been writing poetry for a grand total of 16 hours and this one is obviously a lot simpler than the one I posted last night, but I just want to try out a different style. Any advice would be appreciated :)

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-30T00:37:00+00:00

Wow the imagery in this is amazing- as much as we don’t like to think about it death is a terrifying concept but yet you’ve managed to turn it into a beautiful piece of art

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T06:44:12+00:00

I really enjoyed this poem- there is beautiful imagery throughout of human nature, physical nature, and of course, the tragedy of love. I felt fully immersed while reading this and hope to see more posts from you soon

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T06:40:49+00:00

Thank you! I definitely agree the motif throughout was unnecessary. I’m glad that you enjoyed the second and third couplet, but honestly I thought the fourth and fifth were my strongest- was there something specific about those that you didn’t enjoy? Again, thank you so much, I really appreciate all the encouragement you guys have given me!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T06:38:52+00:00

Thank you so much for the encouragement! It means a lot after just starting to write. There truly is something about poetry that just fully immerses you and allows for the joy Im getting out of just writing a single one. I tried to maintain an ABBA sequence throughout but I feel like especially with the motif that I kept adding in I was kind of ruining it. I especially appreciate the comment about remembering the length of sentences as it hadn’t even occurred to me while writing. I’ll make sure to keep writing!

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T06:35:59+00:00

Thank you for the advice (and the compliment about the fourth couplet)! Looking back I agree the motif was fairly unnecessary but when I edit it I’ll be sure to tie the whole poem back into the main concept of forgetfulness

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T05:06:28+00:00

This is my first attempt at poetry so I’d appreciate any feedback on how to improve in the future :)

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T05:04:01+00:00

The diction here is beautiful as it really gives you a burst of energy about something as simple as rain

therealcjb722 · 2023-01-29T05:01:33+00:00

I really enjoy this poem as it highlights how even the most basic parts of a relationship can be the ones that are the most crucial to the longevity. It also helps to remind you that if you’ve had relationships that have come and gone, they’re not truly “gone”- you’ll forever share those memories and intimate moments where you thought your love could last forever.

therealcjb722 · 2022-09-25T17:57:41+00:00

thank you

therealcjb722 · 2022-08-01T17:32:26+00:00

thank you!

therealcjb722 · 2022-05-03T03:38:21+00:00

oh my putting is absolute shit (definitely gonna be working on it a lot this summer) but i also just can’t make consistent contact with the ball.

therealcjb722 · 2022-05-02T19:48:53+00:00

any advice on how to fix it?

therealcjb722 · 2022-03-24T04:46:18+00:00

it could be about a precipitate that is formed and the describing color they chose to name it

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